Slash fiction has let us down. Yes, fans are constantly writing their own stories about sexual/romantic liaisons between Luke Skywalker and Jabba the Hutt, among other bizarre pairings. But there are still places that naughty fanfic hasn't gone yet, and it's time to give it a little push. What are the couples you wish fans would bring together in the teeming cottage industry of slash?
What Slash Fiction Pairings Do You Wish You'd See?
8:20 AM on Tue Jan 22 2008
By charliejane
4,373 views
36 comments













Comments
Caprica Six, with hmm, Jadzia? I am a huge nerd. Also, there was a really hot chick in SeaQuest who I had a big crush on when I was young - throw her in there too.
How about a romantic relationship between someone made of matter and someone made of, or who was transformed into antimatter?
Emotional compatibility issues aside, it would take some doing for them to live together or even close to one another!
Perhaps they could make use of special materials or technologies to help them in this regard?
I dunno, you brought it up.
cloverfield vs. host seems like a missmatch of weight classes to me. the host monster is a couple tons at most, the cloverfield monster is probably a couple hundred tons.
somebody write me into a sci-fi franchise so i can be eligible for slash fic with xev bellringer. pleeeease?
Gaius Baltar is way too much personality for that piece of wood. He only belongs with Six.
Gaius needs Susan Calvin. (/Asimov Nerd)
I feel like one of the aliens from Encounter at Farpoint needs to get together with the Crystalline Entity. All I'm sayin'.
Recheck your standard definition of slash: Baltar and Jaime doesn't count.
Captain Jack probably has a clone out there somewhere...
According to Rule 34, all of the above have been done. So I suggest a story about Summer Glau and me.
hey, not to be pedantic, but I believe slash is defined as same-sex relationships, so Baltar and the Boring Bionic Woman don't count.
Still waiting for my Buffy/Blake's 7 slash. Oh wait, I mean that I'm waiting for MORE of it.
@sla: Yeah, that's what I thought too. Aren't het pairings "ships" rather than "slash"?
Perry White and Jonah Jameson? Human Torch and Mr. Freeze? Sarah Michelle and Kristy? Dr. Zhivago and Lara?
Slash = same-sex relationships.
Het = different-sex relationships.
Ship = any kind of relationship you like
Gaius Baltar/Jaime Sommers = het ship
Han Solo/Lando Calrissian = slash ship
Any of the above can be written as sexually explicit (which seems to be what io9 mistakenly believes "slash" to mean) or not. A rated-G story in which Han and Lando pick out new curtains for the Millennium Falcon would still be slash. The porniest porn ever porned about Gaius and Jaime still would not be slash.
This message brought to you by a whole lot of wasted time on my part.
@picardia: I've always heard that any pairing that involves explicit sex was "slash". But I'm willing to be corrected.
Deadpool and Black Bolt, because everyone knows that couple.
All 3 girls from birds of prey.
Almost anything involving two men, just so long as one of the men isn't James Marsters. You have no idea how much I'm dreading the Peroxided One's continued influence on Torchwood.
P.S. Before the Spikettes kill me, I should note I loved Spike circa seasons 1-4, and at times during 5-7 but the whole Spike/Buffy thing was v. annoying and caused him to be shirtless way too often.
I pity Poor Kitt and Optimus Prime's offspring that they will inherit Opti's prostate cancer problem.
@PVIII: Commander Mitchell! Oh wait, do you mean the Doctor/Shrink from the last season? Cause she was more 'hot' and Commander Mitchell was more military kick your ass and take your name down while being hot.
@justjack75: Spike on Season 5 Angel rocked and his Torchwood appearance oozed coolness.
I voted for the Jamie Sommers one, because, well, I want it to be Catherine Rymer (Moffat's Jekyll) and someone else. Anyone else really. Ryan didn't look nearly as good as Sommers as she did as Rymer, or maybe that was just Moffat's witty dialogue. A witty woman is so much more attractive than a bland one.
Which explains why Torchwood's women suck. The Trojan Horse alien rocked cause she was evil and witty, and they gave Tosh a good line in the last episode. We need more of that and less of the main characters simply being foils for the villains and Jack.
@aspiringexpatriate: Lt. Cmdr. Hitchcock. Sorry. The actress was on Heroes apparently. [imdb.com]
@charliejane: I don't know where you heard that, but it wasn't from anybody who actually writes or reads slash.
@aspiringexpatriate: We need more of that and less of the main characters simply being foils for the villains and Jack.
Totally. The first series they came off as terribly incompetent a lot of the time. But they look to be delivering for the slash fans this series, that's for sure.
@janine: NO NO NO! DEADPOOL AND CABLE (Plus its cannon :P )!
@PVIII: No way. More like Boomer and Ezri Dax >:D
Does this mean that Bender/Robby the Robot has already happened?
How about Baltar/Dr. Bashir from DS9?
@justjack75: As much as Spike/Buffy annoyed me in s6, it was more the execution than the idea, which I still think was a good one. Anyway it pales in comparison to Willow's story that season, which sucked hardcore until the final couple of episodes.
Torchwood this series rocks my socks.
Dude, Gaius doesn't pout--he whines. That's what kills the sexy. For me, anway :P
@melby:
You see, now that's a pairing! Quick, someone add it to the poll!
@picardia: Or anyone who doesn't read or write it and generally runs screaming from it, but is nevertheless familiar with the concept.
Baltar and Jamie would be a cross-universe, and a ship, but not slash. (new heights of annoying whineyness as well)
How great would Optimus and KITT's offspring SOUND?
Jamie S./No. Six/No. Eight. And maybe Three.
Oh my goodness.
That's MY Luke/Jabba. "What Says the Wind" is a fairly long Star Wars AU. I'm still rather proud of it.
These days I mostly write original same-sex romance for Torquere Press and Ellora's Cave. [www.angelsparrow.com]
On topic, definitely Hulk/Iron Man. There needs to be more muscly super-hero slash.
And Picardia, I wrote Han/Lando here and there.
I'm going to read the Baltar-Jaime Sommers pairing as a cheap shot at Baltar's manhood and NOT a misunderstanding of what slash actually is. Emasculation, yay?
How about some fem-slash? Martha Jones and Rose Tyler (after both effectively tell the Doctor to sod off)? Or (because a part of me wanted it to be true at one point) Admiral Cain and Starbuck?
Paraphrasing Gore Vidal, a gay bar is a place where you stand around drinking until your identical twin walks in. Then the two of you leave together.
On that criteria, the Bashir / Baltar pairing makes perfect sense. As does Admiral Cain with Ensign Ro.
My gay bars are where guys go "woof" at each other, so I could go for some Chief Tyrol-on-Sam Anders action.
GLaDOS and Chell from Portal. The videogame. That counts right? They could make tiny portals and do some portal-porn! As a matter of fact, lets see some mini-portal sex anyway! You could go in one ear and out the other... actually, I'm sure there are more interesting deviant acts than that you could do with portals...
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