With every new thing that comes out about this movie, I am more and more convinced that it's going to be utter shit.

"it's hard candy meets death race 2000."

When I was a struggling, young journalist about 10 years ago, my editor sent me to interview Christina Ricci about her latest movie. She fell asleep during the interview. True story.

Speaking of "celebrating her as a girl and a woman" how is that one Wachowski brother doing?

@Garrison Dean: lol! yeah I do kinda want to know what's up with the other Wachowski (brother).

I just can't bring myself to forgive them for the abominations that were Matrix 2&3. This looks really really bad...

@Garrison Dean: *ding**ding**ding*

If Speedie loses a penis, well, that explains a lot, that's all I'm sayin.

Pops Racer: "You think you can drive a car, and change the world? It doesn't work like that!"

That's the quality writing right there, that's has seeing this movie on opening day! CAN'T WAIT. All they could do to make this movie even more perfect is to include the 90's Speed Racer cartoon intro.

[youtube.com]

yeah what is up with that other wachowski and the whole gender swap thing i heard about?

Isn't "guy sad" in the movies when a tough (and heterosexual, of course) male succumbing to an unstoppable illness à la Brian's Song? Or maybe it's the guy's noble and loyal girlfriend tragically perishing.

Anyway, the apron business is just ick - nothing like a visible reminder that a woman's primary tasks are cooking and cleaning.

@iJake: Just like Thunderbirds.

@Szin: you need to tell me RIGHT NOW how to go back and time and not click on that link. My soul just died a little bit.

As long as it isn't Days of Thunder meets Cars.

Oops, forgot to link to the original theme song..

I smell an uptick in the sale of anti-epileptic drugs, right around the release date of this movie. All I really want to see is Rain aka Jung Ji Hoon do his thing [www.youtube.com] *highly embarrassed fangirl swoon*

the only thing that would make me cry while watching a movie, would be dropping my nachos on the floor.-blurey

@PeggyK: Don't forget about havin' to shoot Old Yeller... wait do they shoot the dog in this??

he gets rear ended and chim chim and that kid are in his trunk at the time.

pops blames speed for it. speed gets drunk and crashes during a race.

I once drove a car to change the world.

All I ended up with was a fractured windshield.

@Epaminondas: Maybe they have to put down a car. Poor Mach 5!

KEVIN! this is the funniest bit of writing on the internet today. If they're smart they'll put this on the poster.
--'The movie looks like a technicolor vomit comet that merged with a hyperactive video game, but we're not saying that's necessarily a bad thing. As long as the lipstick matches the hurl.'--

@schmattakid: Except if they put it on the posters, they'll edit it to say "Technicolor . . . comet . . . hyperactive video game . . . lipstick."

I got three words... 'black snake moan'. After seeing that the hawtie Ricci could do a remake of Beach Blanket Bingo (I wish!), and I would watch it. Just take a six-pack and chips with you.

People, people, people.... I know what "guy sad" is...

Well two things... obvious thing #1, a car gives it's life to save a dude.

Or... and this would make any true man cry... heroic monkey death.

I can't even go on thinking of a heroic monkey death, that is perhaps the saddest guy thing I can think of.

@btgoss: Castration usually ranks in my top.. 1

What's wrong with a positive female role model that isn't wearing skin tight leather and literally kicking someones ass? I've never actually met anyone like the "tough woman" who really just wants to be in the boy's super hero club in real life anyways. Modern female action movie characters are usually bizarre and unbelievable, and more than a little repulsive in their attempts to be masculine and sexy at the same time.

speed loses his penis?? well, thank god he's got the other one.

@X: The Eliminator:
Would that be 'Penis X', then?
-Kle.

@antimatty: Pfff. If the brat and the monkey bit it, the audience would cheer. No matter how sad Speed might be. I can't be the only one who was always hoping they'd get it in the cartoon.

Mach 5 dying, there's your "guy crying".

Mach 5 will die about ten minutes into it, and of course Speed will then get Mach 6.

If car commercials have taught me anything, it's unload that old junker and get the new model - it's MUCH better.

Mach 5 dying? That sucks!