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NASA is readying two spacecraft to slam into the Moon's South Pole in an effort to find hidden polar ice a year from now, which gives Hollywood plenty of time to prep the movie and release it when all of this Moon-violence is at a fever pitch. After the spacecraft crash dead-on into the moon, another standby ship will fly through the plume that gets thrown up, grab some of the debris, and then analyze it. But what if this were a major motion picture? Things would turn out a little differently. Here's our idea.
At only a $79 million dollar budget, a major studio could just buy this project out and turn it into a shot at box office gold. In the Hollywood version, the spacecraft would wake up a dormant alien being, long buried underneath the lunar surface, or they'd start a chain reaction that would cause the moon to break up into a billion pieces, which would begin raining down on the Earth. Then NASA would have to hire a maverick space jockey — Eric Bana? — to either deal with the alien menace, or the falling debris.
Or what if the moon turned out to be a deep space probe that's been orbiting the planet for eons? Silently biding its time. Then, a rude awakening comes in the form of us crashing things into it and the bot pilots running the probe try to send down big guns to mete out some stellar justice. It feels like the start of a bad Dimension Films plot, we know. But, there's probably a good idea buried in there somewhere. Just as long as it doesn't dislodge the moon from orbit and force us to watch the only good scene in The Time Machine again.
NASA Takes Aim at Moon with Double Sledgehammer [Yahoo News]
Image from the 1902 George Méliès film A Trip To The Moon.
Comments
sir, are you suggesting that we blow up the moon?
i wouldn't miss it... would you miss it?
The moonenintes have the quad laser, so the Earth is screwed.
David Weber wrote an okay novel based on the 2nd idea.
I'm guessing that the Hollywood version would be closer to this:
1) hot big breasted moon women (BBMW) aliens awakened by probe.
2) They decided to invade the earth
3) Most of earth enslaved by BBMW
4) unpossible 20 year old scientist/engineer/skateboarder/US Navy SEAL figures out how to defeat the BBMW.
5) 20 year old scientist/engineer/skateboarder/US Navy SEAL seduces the ultra hot rebel leader (Megan Fox) of the evil BBMW.
6) BBMW are defeated by earthican product placement (Mountain Dew?)
7) 20 year old scientist/engineer/skateboarder/US Navy SEAL and now BBMW new leader kiss.
For thousands of years mankind has longer to destroy the moon!
Now, finally, the dream is about to be realized!
Or it could force us to watch re-runs of Space 1999 :D
@Manchu...Nice!
But if we blow up the moon, what will all of us do with the shoeboxes with pinholes in them? I mean we only pull them out once a decade or so, but still...
@steven522: You can still use them to look at the Sun. Scout's honor.
@ManchuCandidate: Dunno....sounds more like a porno plot to me.
Why would we ever blow up the Moon when he's such a funny guy?
+ Watch video
@bonniegrrl: Now i know why we're taking potshots at it. That was painful.
@Gopherit: Oh dear. That was rather awful.
But I thought the moon was Ed Harris' 'Mission Control' in Burbank ???
Mr Show - "America Will Blow Up The Moon"
+ Watch video
Have you not seen The Time machine? Or ever watched Discovery. No moon = shit goes BANANAS here on earth. Let's blow up Mars.
((((((((The moon will glow for as long as mankind keeps her peace in the universe.))))))))))
The Moon is a Harsh Mistress
Yeah, the Loonies win in the Heinlein novel. Because of gravity.
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