io9
When society implodes, women need to make themselves easy zombie targets, so the boys can run to the hills and get weaponized. That seems to be the point of a lot of self-proclaimed post-apocalyptic fashion, at least. From floor-length hobble skirts with a million straps to straitjackets to kinky boots, the clothes in SludgeFaktory's post-apocalyptic collection would be worst thing to wear while trying to escape from cannibal bikers. Weirdly, mainstream fashion designers are creating more appropriate dystopian future-wear. Click through for images.
At least the pre-torn skirts and tops will save the cyborgs a lot of time, when they catch up with you. And it's good that one skirt says "CANNIBAL" on it, lest your captors forget what they are.
Meanwhile, self-proclaimed postapocalyptic designer Yeohlee Teng unveiled her fall 2008 collection last month, and it actually does look like stuff that might offer some protection from falling satellites and spattering monster blood. Could this be a rare instance where mainstream fashion is actually smarter than subculture wear? Look at this gallery and decide for yourself: Yeohlee photos by Scott Gries/Getty Images for IMG.
Comments
Apparently after the apocalypse, everyone tries too hard.
Isn't this part of Mugata's Derelicte line?
Mesh is good against radioactivity. Also, torn t-shirts stop bacterial infection.
Why do I need to wear pre-ripped crap after the apocolypse? Won't the mutant zombie hordes just do the tearing for me?
Apparently Siouxsie Sioux run Barter Town.
The next man on the moon will be chinese.
@zeppelined: Suburban goths are like roaches -- they're here to stay, a-bomb or no.
After the apocalypse, won't Jesus make my clothes? I'm confused, Father.
@Garrison Dean: Siouxsie Sioux wouldn't be caught dead/undead/fauxdead in the SludgeFaktory mess...nor in one of those half-ass haircuts.
I have a feeling the zombies will come just to rip these heinous clothes off these peoples bodies.
Looks like the hot topics been looted. Guess I'll have to go loot old navy.
I have a hard time calling that 'mainstream'. It's 'high fashion', but I don't think it fits a definition of mainstream I've heard. But yeah, ponchos and jumpsuits. woo
@92BuickLeSabre: Did I just piss of an old school goth?! And more importantly is LeSabre an old school goth?
@Plague: and death comes on little cats feet.
@jenndavo: Either that or the rips will come from climbing over the broken rubble of civilization.
You don't want anything with rings, strands, clasps or anything that will provide zombies or road bandits with a handhold of any kind, nor do you want anything in danger of getting sucked into the pulley of a supercharger. You need to make sure you can hop from vehicle to vehicle with a crossbow in each hand without fear of getting your garments snagged on a spike.
Geez... there's, like, no leather, chains, or fur in there. This must be the Vegan apocolypse.
I totes want black nailpolish after the apocalypse so you can't see all the dried blood under my fingernails.
@NefariousNewt: Well, in that case, SCREW corsets. I'm with Skeller -- let's ride out the Rapture in some sensible khaki slacks.
Saw this and all I can think was "Sneakin into the Movies" from Hollywood Shuffle.
Zombie pimps..
[video.google.com]
Shooting at the walls of heartache. Bang. Bang. I am the warrior.
@Garrison Dean:
Are you sure you aren't my good twin?
@Rus McLaughlin: True. Post-apocalyptic polyester is not easy to come by....
@Garrison Dean: The two previous songs playing on my iTunes were Devo's "Jerkin' Back and Forth" and Human League's "Don't You Want Me."
So, no, not goth; more like my TARDIS broke down in the mid-80s, and I can't seem to get back.
@Annalee Newitz: This is exactly why I don't trust it when your new hires are "seemingly nice."
Daymn, I want that fluorescent pink straight-jacket!
But, seriously, the second set of pictures is interesting, but the first set just looks like your run of the mill pseudo punk clothing. Nothing special there.
But I seriously want that jacket.
Those are awful cybergoth clothes. There's no such thing as good cybergoth clothes by the way.
I assume that the atomic bomb did that to the end of her skirt.
The Sludge Facktory model looks slightly mortified in the shots where her hair is not covering her face. And rightly so.
This is all very 1998. I rocked the long skirts with flair look hard back in the day.
I don't see anyone with shoulderpads. Where are the shoulderpads with big spikes in them?
@92BuickLeSabre: Ha! I'm still just trying to figure out what the hell "dogwitch" is. Post-apocalyptic hound?
@Plague: Not possible. I often sport a mustache, which would make me the bad one probably.
@92BuickLeSabre: And now I have "Don't you want me" stuck in my head. It was used really well in that cookie commercial. Here watch it.
[tinyurl.com]
Is this Chloe Sevigny's new line? Forgive the entirely probable misspelling.
@Annalee Newitz: According to wikipedia:
"I'm a neo-ecto-maxi-pagan...voodoo junkie and dabblin' ouija monkey! I'm the saucy spellbinder...the zoom-doom floozy, spawn of spooky... I'M THE GODDAMN TWENTY-FIRST CENTURY DOGWITCH!"
...which may, in fact, be the best wikipedia quote I've ever seen.
@Garrison Dean: Thank god the title pops up before the video starts...just enough time to not hear a single beat. *Whew, that was close.*
@Garrison Dean:
No, only a GOATEE makes you the evil one.
I really like the the skirt with the metal plate to protect your ovaries from gamma rays.
@Plague: we were both wrong, and right.
I was really jazzed to see that look on him as I have several pics of me like that, but sadly can't post them here due to the importance of anonymity among people I regularly argue with and pick on. Maybe if I get drunk and arrogant later.
I thought a dogwitch was hot dogs on sliced bread...
Maybe they don't mean fashion for a post-apocalypse world, but clothing from a post fashion-apocalypse world.
-Kle.
@Garrison Dean:
Yes.
Because we are both really important people and no one should know who we are.
;)
I thought a dogwitch was the same as hobodogs and iguana on a stick.
@Plague: That and I don't want to get recognized and sucker punched by some World of Warcraft nut.
But more because we are kind of big deals.
So apparently what they said about Cher surviving the apocalypse was true? This stuff belongs at a rave that happened 10 years ago. And those shredded skirts are so halfassed.
@92BuickLeSabre: Definitely best wikipedia moment ever.
Wow.
That's the most unattractive clothing I've seen on a woman in a long time.
They really would look better in burlap sacks.
that reminds me - Fashion Institute of Technology!!!
"When society implodes, women need to make themselves easy zombie targets, so the boys can run to the hills and get weaponized"
I had no idea Redeker was such a mysogynist.
According to Yeohlee Teng, this particular collection was inspired by Shakers. I'm not sure what that says about the nature of the apocalypse, but if I ever feel compelled to put on nothing but a spandex catsuit and a hood made out of a sleeping bag, I'll probably be about ready for the world to end.
I'd have to hike up all of those skirts around my waist to actually run from cannibal bikers...please tell me there's a lingerie line that actually has finished seams.
It's like they wanted to get eaten by zombies...
Maybe they're the bait?!
Are you sure this clothing line is for zombie-attack survivors and not the zombies themselves. If it's actually the latter, I think these designers are very kind for helping our undead foes pick their outfits. Once your brain has been destroyed by the virus/nanobots/MacGuffin, you might find it quite difficult to co-ordinate your wardrobe. Also, the reduced-mobility issues are entirely irrelevant if you're only going to shuffle slowly toward your prey.