Today is the 30th anniversary of the ill-fated TV experience known as the Star Wars Holiday Special. Featuring a group of Wookiees trying to celebrate the holidays while being hassled by Imperial troops - along with song-and-dance numbers and comedy bits in a variety show format - the two-hour special was deemed so hideous that it was never aired again. Luckily you can celebrate this day of infamy with a little help from Shawn Moynihan, managing editor of Editor & Publisher, who has sent us a little song . . .

Here is Shawn's original musical tribute, intended to be sung to the tune of "Sgt. Pepper's Lonely Hearts Club Band":

It was 30 years ago today
We didn't have a VCR to play
George had given in to CBS
Who tried to do Star Wars with less

But it didn't take too long to see
What a horror it would come to be
Holiday Special, aww, you were so bad

Wookiees talking with a Shriiwook* sound
No subtitles to be found
Everything was going awfully wrong
Bea Arthur singing cantina songs

But that night they introduced you to
A bounty hunter in green and blue
Holiday Special, aww, you were so bad

Malla cooking with a Bantha stew
Art Carney brought a gift or two
Itchy fantasies to kids' dismay
Diahann Carroll where are you today

Lumpy watching animated Fett
Harvey Korman took one in the head
Holiday Special, aww, you were so bad

Now Chewie made it home in time
For a Life Day chorus line
And people, if we've learned a thing,
Don't let Carrie Fisher sing
Thank the Force that you will never see
Lucasfilm release a DVD
Holiday Special, aww, you were so bad

(* Shriiwook being the language of the Wookiees.)

We just don't know what to say, Shawn. It's . . . beautiful! And it even has a footnote!

Star Wars Holiday Special [via Wikipedia, source of all information about fiction]

Send an email to Annalee Newitz, the author of this post, at annalee@io9.com.