Trailer Reveals Who’s Hooking Up With Kirk and Why Scotty’s All WetClick to viewThe new Star Trek trailer revealed Spock’s inner toil and the color of Uhura’s undergarments, but it left us with a whole host of new questions. Who’s that in Kirk’s bed? Why is Scotty dripping wet? What’s causing all the earthquakes on Vulcan? And where did all those crazy ships come from? We take you shot by shot through the trailer and examine some of the theories and fan speculation. Spoilers ahead.The trailer opens on a red Corvette speeding down a rural road. After a few seconds, we realize that a motorcycle is in pursuit, while something like a police siren blares in the background. Several bloggers note that the license plate says “Iowa.” Trailer Reveals Who’s Hooking Up With Kirk and Why Scotty’s All WetS As the Corvette comes upon a cliff, it turns suddenly, trying to slow down, and a young James T. Kirk hurls himself from the car. Trailer Reveals Who’s Hooking Up With Kirk and Why Scotty’s All Wet Trailer Reveals Who’s Hooking Up With Kirk and Why Scotty’s All Wet As he scrambles up the cliff, we hear the car crash below. Trailer Reveals Who’s Hooking Up With Kirk and Why Scotty’s All Wet Some sort of space cop gets off the motorcycle. His face is covered in metal and we can see the number “924” coming down from his helmet. In a metallic voice, he asks the boy, “What is your name?” Trailer Reveals Who’s Hooking Up With Kirk and Why Scotty’s All Wet Charles Trotter in the TrekMovie comments notes that the numbers may offer some insight into our metal friend:
RoboCop’s model number is 924
So, it’s probably not a sentient android (since were pre-Data), but this may be some sort of cyborg or semi-autonomous law enforcement. Ever defiant, the boy responds, “I am James! Tiberius! Kirk!” Trailer Reveals Who’s Hooking Up With Kirk and Why Scotty’s All Wet Once again, we find ourselves on a rural road, following a motorcycle as it drives past distant futuristic structures. A voice over tells us everything we need to know about Kirk: “You’ve always had a hard time finding a place in this world, haven’t you? Never knowing your true worth. You can settle for less, an ordinary life. But you feel like you were meant for something better. Something special.” The motorcycle stops, and now we see a now adult-ish Kirk looking out on a Federation shipyard as it constructs the Enterprise. Yes, the Starfleet shipyard is on the ground. Trailer Reveals Who’s Hooking Up With Kirk and Why Scotty’s All WetS Trailer Reveals Who’s Hooking Up With Kirk and Why Scotty’s All Wet Now we move to Vulcan and visit Spock’s dysfunctional childhood. Trailer Reveals Who’s Hooking Up With Kirk and Why Scotty’s All Wet Spock is utterly adorable in his bowl cut and pointed eyebrows, but a steady voice warns him “You will always be a child of two worlds” Trailer Reveals Who’s Hooking Up With Kirk and Why Scotty’s All Wet Cut to Amanda Grayson, Spock’s mother, holding her infant son while Sarek sits beside her, looking appropriately grave. Trailer Reveals Who’s Hooking Up With Kirk and Why Scotty’s All Wet A somewhat older Spock appears before what looks like a sideways tribunal. Trailer Reveals Who’s Hooking Up With Kirk and Why Scotty’s All Wet The voice continues: “And fully capable of deciding your own destiny.” Now in Starfleet uniform, Spock beams down to the surface of Vulcan, which is shaking. Trailer Reveals Who’s Hooking Up With Kirk and Why Scotty’s All Wet Then we switch to a Starfleet hangar where, judging from the shuttle numbers, crewmen wait to be shuttled to the Enterprise. Trailer Reveals Who’s Hooking Up With Kirk and Why Scotty’s All WetS The voice over to Spock still continues: “The question you face is which path will you choose.” Kirk and Spock are on the bridge of the Enterprise. Spock is in uniform, but Kirk is not (presumably because he has not received a commission). And Kirk has some lacerations around his left eye. Christopher Pike is noticeably absent from the captain’s chair. Trailer Reveals Who’s Hooking Up With Kirk and Why Scotty’s All Wet The Enterprise leaves its docking station, and goes into Warp. Trailer Reveals Who’s Hooking Up With Kirk and Why Scotty’s All WetS Trailer Reveals Who’s Hooking Up With Kirk and Why Scotty’s All Wet We cut to a space battle featuring the trailer’s real star: the USS Kelvin. Trailer Reveals Who’s Hooking Up With Kirk and Why Scotty’s All Wet Back on the Enterprise bridge, we flash briefly on Anton Yelchin as Chekov, who, in his biggest moment of the trailer, sits at his station. Trailer Reveals Who’s Hooking Up With Kirk and Why Scotty’s All Wet The Kelvin crashes into a huge, oddly shaped ship, enduring its first fiery death of the trailer. Trailer Reveals Who’s Hooking Up With Kirk and Why Scotty’s All Wet Cinema Verdict echoes my thoughts on the matter:
And were those tentacles? What’s that about?
From Slayer Placemat:
[P]lease, please, please, please don't be Romulan
Back on Vulcan, which is still shaking, Spock escorts Amanda on his arm through the crumbling landscape. Trailer Reveals Who’s Hooking Up With Kirk and Why Scotty’s All Wet Back on the Enterprise, eye injury Kirk is taunting Spock: “Are you afraid or aren’t you?” Trailer Reveals Who’s Hooking Up With Kirk and Why Scotty’s All Wet We briefly flash on Eric Bana as Nero as he extends his menacing weapon. Trailer Reveals Who’s Hooking Up With Kirk and Why Scotty’s All Wet Slayer Placemat notes that Nero’s surroundings look familiar:
But, above him is a now familiar weird tentacle thing in that observation bubble. Which means the organic [tentacle] ship is probably his.
On the Enterprise again, Spock responds: “I will not allow you to lecture me.” Trailer Reveals Who’s Hooking Up With Kirk and Why Scotty’s All Wet Kirk: “Then why don’t you stop me?” Big mistake, Kirk. Spock’s human side lays the smackdown. Trailer Reveals Who’s Hooking Up With Kirk and Why Scotty’s All Wet An explosion inside a building blows out two bodies. Trailer Reveals Who’s Hooking Up With Kirk and Why Scotty’s All Wet An away team skydives along a massive a massive drill that is boring into the surface of Vulcan and causing all that pesky shaking.. A yellow parachute and a blue parachute have been deployed, while a red body continues to fall. Trailer Reveals Who’s Hooking Up With Kirk and Why Scotty’s All Wet Trailer Reveals Who’s Hooking Up With Kirk and Why Scotty’s All Wet Based on reports from the press preview, the three are Kirk, Sulu, and Chief Engineer Olsen. If you’re wondering why you’ve never heard of Olsen before, bear in mind that he’s wearing a red shirt. Back on the bridge, the screen displays the wreckage of several ships. This is probably the debris field seen in one of the press clips, the wreckage of other ships sent on a rescue mission to Vulcan. Trailer Reveals Who’s Hooking Up With Kirk and Why Scotty’s All Wet Kirk (still not in uniform), Uhura, and a few other crewmen dash madly through the corridors, perhaps to warn Pike that they’re headed into a trap. Trailer Reveals Who’s Hooking Up With Kirk and Why Scotty’s All Wet Christopher Pike sits in the captain’s chair: “Prepare to fire all weapons,” while Kirk stands behind him. Trailer Reveals Who’s Hooking Up With Kirk and Why Scotty’s All Wet A strange little mystery ship whirls across the screen. Trailer Reveals Who’s Hooking Up With Kirk and Why Scotty’s All Wet Slayer Placemat’s theory:
This could be a Roumlan shippy thing. Early Romulans were weird and had strange shit going on in the aft hull. Like this whirly-gig critter.
Several commenters at TrekMovie suggest that this is actually future Spock’s “time ship.” Down on Vulcan, Kirk punches a Romulan. Trailer Reveals Who’s Hooking Up With Kirk and Why Scotty’s All Wet A shirtless Kirk looks under someone’s bed. Judging from the bracelet and the high-heeled boot, it’s either not his bed, or he’s been having a lot of company over. Trailer Reveals Who’s Hooking Up With Kirk and Why Scotty’s All Wet In one of rooms, Uhura takes off her shirt, revealing a white bra. We hear Simon Pegg say, “I like this ship" in a tone as perky as Uhura's bizarrely 20th Century bra. Trailer Reveals Who’s Hooking Up With Kirk and Why Scotty’s All Wet Then we get a good look at Scotty, who continues, “It's exciting.” Trailer Reveals Who’s Hooking Up With Kirk and Why Scotty’s All Wet Why is Scotty so wet? Judging from that heavy jacket and the several layers of sweaters, my bet is that he’s just beamed off the ice planet (see below). On Vulcan again, Sulu displays his awesome fencing skills. Trailer Reveals Who’s Hooking Up With Kirk and Why Scotty’s All Wet A blue explosion occurs behind the Enterprise, gradually engulfing it. Trailer Reveals Who’s Hooking Up With Kirk and Why Scotty’s All Wet On Vulcan, Nero looks down at Kirk, who his dangling from a ledge, holding on for dear life. Meanwhile, Nero’s drill sends a flaming beam into the planet. Trailer Reveals Who’s Hooking Up With Kirk and Why Scotty’s All Wet A voice tells us, “Space is disease…” Sulu shuffles across a ledge, presumably to save Kirk’s ass. Trailer Reveals Who’s Hooking Up With Kirk and Why Scotty’s All Wet “and danger…” Nero is now in a Klingon prison, trying to escape from a pair of guards wearing Klingon ridged masks. Trailer Reveals Who’s Hooking Up With Kirk and Why Scotty’s All Wet More explosions: Trailer Reveals Who’s Hooking Up With Kirk and Why Scotty’s All Wet Now we see the speaker. It’s Karl Urban as Dr. “Bones” McCoy, doing his best grumpy DeForest Kelley face: “…wrapped in darkness and silence.” Trailer Reveals Who’s Hooking Up With Kirk and Why Scotty’s All Wet On a snowy planet we haven’t seen before, someone gets a blast of bad breath from a giant monster. Trailer Reveals Who’s Hooking Up With Kirk and Why Scotty’s All Wet Trailer Reveals Who’s Hooking Up With Kirk and Why Scotty’s All Wet The press footage showed Kirk on an ice planet after Spock kicks him off the Enterprise, where he meets older Spock and Scotty. It would seem that he battles snow monsters as well. Now we’re back on some ship’s bridge. Kirk is wearing a command uniform now, and tells Spock, with a clap on the shoulder, to “Buckle Up.” He’s looking suspiciously captain-like in his gold tunic and braided sleeves. Trailer Reveals Who’s Hooking Up With Kirk and Why Scotty’s All Wet The Kelvin experiences its second fiery death of the trailer. Is this just cramming as much action footage as possible into the trailer, or is there a method to this double madness? Edward Duddy at TrekMovie thinks it’s possible:
Why are there 2 DIFFERENT shots of the Kelvin being blown up? I just noticed it after my 10th time viewing the trailer, ha. Time travel maybe? Something like TNG’s Cause and Effect? Hmm.
Trailer Reveals Who’s Hooking Up With Kirk and Why Scotty’s All Wet We’re back to angry Spock from before. Evidently, Kirk really pissed him off, because he’s got Kirk by the throat now and shows no sign of letting go. Trailer Reveals Who’s Hooking Up With Kirk and Why Scotty’s All Wet The bizarre tentacle ship drops out of warp. Trailer Reveals Who’s Hooking Up With Kirk and Why Scotty’s All Wet And, now Kirk gets his mandatory sexing. And who’s the lucky lady? YoJimbo at TrekMovie has it:
ORION SLAVE GIRL…. If you go through the 1080p trailer frame-by-frame you see that the girl Kirk is in bed with has GREEN SKIN! Ahahahaha.
He’s right. If you pause on the HD trailer, you can see she’s sporting skimpy underwear and green skin. Trailer Reveals Who’s Hooking Up With Kirk and Why Scotty’s All WetS In a hallway on Vulcan, a giant statue tumbles. Trailer Reveals Who’s Hooking Up With Kirk and Why Scotty’s All Wet The mystery ship reappears. Trailer Reveals Who’s Hooking Up With Kirk and Why Scotty’s All Wet A blond woman screams while a man in white stands calmly beside her. The consensus on the blogs is that this is Mama Kirk giving birth to the future captain. And if I squint, I suppose that could be Jennifer Morrison. Trailer Reveals Who’s Hooking Up With Kirk and Why Scotty’s All Wet Inside what appears to be the tentacle ship, Kirk has a gun that doesn’t quite look Starfleet issue. He fires. Trailer Reveals Who’s Hooking Up With Kirk and Why Scotty’s All Wet An attack ship sails past the tentacle ship. Trailer Reveals Who’s Hooking Up With Kirk and Why Scotty’s All Wet The Kelvin, in its final appearance of the trailer, sustains heavy damage, presumably before suffering the aforementioned fiery deaths. Trailer Reveals Who’s Hooking Up With Kirk and Why Scotty’s All WetS Nero closes out the trailer, looking particularly ragged, and says, “The wait is over.” Trailer Reveals Who’s Hooking Up With Kirk and Why Scotty’s All Wet Well, not for us. We’ve still got six more months to go. [Apple Trailers]