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io9: The Site That May Make Keanu Reeves Cry.

I knew that I wasn't a fan of the news that Keanu is going to star in a live-action Cowboy Bebop, but you guys took it much, much worse than I did.

Here's just a sampling of the responses that Friday's post got:

edosan: "Dear God, no."

Aleksandr Kalininskiy: "No please please don't do this! Bebop was for me what Star Wars is for folks who were teens in the 70's. So don't ruin my childhood! Damn it all...I will have to watch this movie but..grahhhh"

Mazda Eric wants to make sexy time: "NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO this story isn't here! I am not reading this, ((cover ears)) LALALALALALALALALALALA....."

Efflux: "No...No....no,no,no,no,no,no,no. NOOOO!!!!!"

Evil Tortie's Mom: "to chime in with everyone else: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO...!!!!!!!!"

br4nd0n: "NO! NO! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!"

Apparently, the consensus to this news was "No." Although some felt slightly more strongly than that:

johnnyichiban: "ARRRRGGGGGHHHHH!!!!ARRRRGGGGGHHHHH!!!!ARRRRGGGGGHHHHH!!!!ARRRRGGGGGHHHHH!!!!ARRRRGGGGGHHHHH!!!!ARRRRGGGGGHHHHH!!!!
ARRRRGGGGGHHHHH!!!!ARRRRGGGGGHHHHH!!!!ARRRRGGGGGHHHHH!!!!ARRRRGGGGGHHHHH!!!!ARRRRGGGGGHHHHH!!!!ARRRRGGGGGHHHHH!!!!"

snowcrash: "ARRRRGGGGGHHHHH!!!!ARRRRGGGGGHHHHH!!!!ARRRRGGGGGHHHHH!!!!ARRRRGGGGGHHHHH!!!!ARRRRGGGGGHHHHH!!!!ARRRRGGGGGHHHHH!!!!
ARRRRGGGGGHHHHH!!!!ARRRRGGGGGHHHHH!!!!ARRRRGGGGGHHHHH!!!!ARRRRGGGGGHHHHH!!!!ARRRRGGGGGHHHHH!!!!ARRRRGGGGGHHHHH!!!!

ARRRRGGGGGHHHHH!!!!ARRRRGGGGGHHHHH!!!!ARRRRGGGGGHHHHH!!!!ARRRRGGGGGHHHHH!!!!ARRRRGGGGGHHHHH!!!!ARRRRGGGGGHHHHH!!!!
ARRRRGGGGGHHHHH!!!!ARRRRGGGGGHHHHH!!!!ARRRRGGGGGHHHHH!!!!ARRRRGGGGGHHHHH!!!!ARRRRGGGGGHHHHH!!!!ARRRRGGGGGHHHHH!!!!"

Yes, that's right; snowcrash feels exactly twice as strongly about this as johnnyichiban.

Thank God for RossFenelon and his reasoned thinking:

Alright *exhale*... Now that my co-workers have talked me down off that ledge, I have had a chance to look at this rationally. I understand why he did this. This is just a self indulgent fanboy fantasy being fulfilled by someone with more clout than taste. I have nothing against his appreciation for Shinichiro Watanabe's masterpiece. But if he would take an honest look at his acting "style" and the demands for this role he would see that it would be better for him to step down and let a relatively unknown actor take this role. These are the reasons; 1) He's too old. He has the height and build for the character and also the martial arts background. But at his age, he would be hard pressed to convey Spike's boyish devil-may-care attitude. Maybe in his Bill & Ted days or even Devil's Advocate. Not now though. This brings me to my next point 2) He's too famous; Spike is a subtle and complex character. Outwardly aloof but deceptively deep and introspective. This is his main appeal. Reeve's fame will undoubtedly over shadow those complexities and this film will most likely devolve into a run of the mill Sci-fi action vehicle for the star. Average movie goers, uninitiated into the Bebop world, will miss out on the depth this character has to offer. the only thing that could give me any hope that this movie will be a quality effort is if they announce that Yoko Kanno is going to do the score along with the Seatbelts and the other artists who made the unforgettable music of Cowboy Bebop. Lastly, if Reeve's ABSOLUTELY had to be in the movie in a leading capacity, the only role I could see him filling is maybe that of Vicious. With his deadpan acting style he might be able to pull that off... maybe... possibly... Oh who am I kidding we're screwed.

Others, meanwhile, didn't see this as the This Is A Disaster that it so clearly is:

OlavRokne: "Keanu is a better actor than anyone gives him credit for. In fact, he may have been one of the only things *right* about the Day the Earth Stood Still (the other was John Cleese)."

DaltonKonowalchuk: "Keanu was one of the two good things in TDTESS, the other was John Gleese. The man was outstanding in Scanner Darkly and Matrix. He has a slate of good projects, give him some credit. And he has the looks, the vibe and the style of Spike, he will make it just right. Plus, they are bringing the original japanese team on board, what means they are serious about doing something good with it. As for Jet, bring Dwayne Johnson!"

Final: "I'll disent. I think he can pull it off. Spike wasn't that outwardly emotional. I'm more concerned about who will play Jet and Ed... Faye they're gonna screw up and get Megan Fox or some other eye candy that can't act."

SinsapaCassandra: "i love keanu reeves! u nerds are too sensitive over nothing.. dont kill my childhood!! blah blah stfu. look at transformers. he was great in constintine and the matrix. just stfu already"

Well, that's us told. From now on, we here at io9 will be stuhfooing on a regular basis. Or something.


Send an email to Graeme McMillan, the author of this post, at graeme@io9.com.


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