Christian Slater really must be his own worst enemy. Why else would he have agreed to star in Alone In The Dark, Uwe Boll's worst film? Just check out this great mad-scientist/Tara Reid confrontation . Below: alien parasite throat invasion!

I love the fact that Slater puts so much energy into telling mad-science guy not to open that evil door that must never be opened, but then once it's opened, he's like "Ehh. Might as well go in."

Alone In The Dark does have several things to recommend it, including Slater acting even more pissy than usual, and Tara Reid phoning in a fine performance. (Although according to Wikipedia, Boll put out a DVD with all of Reid's scenes removed.) It has one of the greatest nonsensical opening voiceovers of all time. And there are about 500 scenes of people fighting CG monsters, mostly in such total darkness that you can't actually tell what's going on.

But then there's this great scene, where a random good guy gets throat-raped and taken over by an alien mind-control parasite that bonds with your spine, but somehow goes down your throat anyway. And then Slater and Reid take one of their occasional stabs at explaining the plot, not very well: