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A Rash of Bizarre UFO Abductions in Australia

The inter-webs are buzzing with reports that countless people in Australia are claiming aliens abducted them and took them to some kind of medical facility over the Blue Mountains.

George, a bank manager in Sydney, Australia, told a reporter:

I had the window wide open and was lying in my bed next to it trying to get a cool breeze happening. I was drowsy but definitely not asleep. Then I began floating out my window and over Sydney. I wasn't nervous but felt a bit surprised, like what the hell was happening. It was as if I had been sedated, thinking back. I saw the city pass by under or at least felt as if it was and then thought I might have been going over some bush or mountains.

I was on a platform and then on some kind of operating table in a chamber within a UFO, I think. I noticed odd ‘furniture' in the room: if you could call it that- unusual spheres and pyramids. There were beings over me. They appeared to be wearing white robes or togas of some sort. I could not see their faces or any bodily features. Nothing in this UFO chamber looked human. What looked somewhat like a dental or baking instrument was then inserted into my backside and pulled out and put away.

UFOlogist Michael Cohen says that he is confident that the people making these kinds of reports are telling the truth. He says many of them include similar details in their stories, and few of them have had any interest in UFOs before their abduction experience. They are just "regular people" according to him. It may not be clear what's causing the sudden interest in Australians on the part of aliens, but Cohen does have a few words of advice if you want to avoid having baking instruments put into your backside by aliens in togas. He writes:

I make a point of driving past the homes of abductees that contact me. I have noticed other common factors that in no way can correspond to the psychology of the abductees. Usually abductees will live on wide open, boulevard type streets and the window they floated through will face this street. There are never any bars on their bedroom windows. A large percentage of abductees are single men who won't be missed for a few minutes of absence at 3am.

This tells us a few things. The aliens doing the abducting are advanced: but they can't float people through walls. They like to make things easy for themselves. Many ufologists equate the ability to travel faster than the speed of light with the ability to do anything. This might not be the case.

More than anything else the aliens doing the abducting don't want any corroborative witnesses. They don't mind the abductees knowing what occurred but they want to keep their activities otherwise secret. They go to extra-ordinary lengths to this end.

It appears that cloaking technology is used to disguise any bodies floating through the sky and abductions are done in the dead of the night. it is also believed that the entire abduction process is completed within minutes.
Sydney UFO abduction accounts indicate that if you really don't want to be abducted invest in an air-conditioner or a fan. Avoid sleeping with an open-window if possible or install bars. Most abductions occur during Australia's hot summer.

Okay, Australians and tourists, you heard it here first: if you are in Australia in summer, please run the air conditioning as much as possible. Also, avoid proximity to cloaking technology and try not to be a single male at 3 AM. I think that's just plain good advice.

via All News Web


Send an email to Annalee Newitz, the author of this post, at annalee@io9.com.


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