Jun 28, 2009 01:00 PM
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San Francisco, 10:02 PM
Tue Feb 9
26 posts in the last 24 hours
Could this have been the biggest week of all time? The King of Pop bites it. A bit player from Saturn 3 and Logan's Run croaks. And ROBOT BAYHEM!!! Disaster!
X-BABIES:
From zombie heroes to killing Cap, do you get the feeling that maybe Marvel doesn't really think through all of their wacky ideas? I mean, X-Babies?! This will end badly.
EMOTIONAL ROBOTS:
There were so many complaints about the confusing design and lack of emotion in the first Transformer that Michael Bay went out of his way to add a sidekick character in this one that really can show that the Autobots are nothing but heart.
CAPTAINS TABLE:
I don't normally say things like this, but these two seem like good well meaning guys who are working on a really fun business venture. So I'll just mutter. sorryboutthis.
FUTURE WHOOPS:
An massive underground bunker devoted to dangerous experimental science... What could possibly go wrong?
COMMENTER AWARENESS:
Well, summer is upon us. This means that there are people out there with a bit more time on their hands now that they aren't burdening professors with sophomoric ideas on politics and philosophy. Instead, they inflict us with their thoughtless fandom. Reminding us what high art G1 Transformers were and how badly their memories have been raped via countless adaptations and sequels. They aren't really trolls as their opinions can be valid and they aren't looking for a fight, so they don't quite deserve good old Donald Sutherland. I think their problem isn't really a need for attention or a lack of intelligence, but rather a lack of direction. So they just need a street sign. So use this to point them in the right way.
IT'S A DISASTER!!!:
I'm sorry you guys. Pointing out disasters is taking a week off. As the man who created the tag "Michael Bay is Awesome" I am taking a moment to honor the man as he unleashed one of his greatest works of art on the world. My review? (and this is honest) It was awesome, I really enjoyed it. Though I will admit it was a bit much. But, complaining about excess in a Michael Bay movie starring 40' tall robots is like telling the waitress at Cheesecake Factory that your salad is too big.
So Sir Bay, as you dominate the Box Office and as the world Twitters away about your Bill Brasky-like facts, I want to share this fact. You naysayers are right, Michael Bay has no heart. It was replaced by God with a never ending controlled explosion so that he may forever bring to the world more grandeur. In honor of his sacrifice I created this painting which I titled
"Deliver Us Some Awesome"
Garrison Dean's real name is not Garrison Dean and he understands that some of you may be crazy enough to want wallpaper.
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