Black Eyed Peas New Music Video: We're Not Robots, We're Just Awful

The Black Eyed Peas have piled everything that is terrible in today's science fiction into one giant Terminator Salvation-inspired music video. The 10-minute monster is fraught with lens flares, silver masks, plastic capes and break-dancing ray guns.


The following are my responses to the pre-video conversation the Peas are having pre-tin foil battle.

"Look at this robot outfit!" - Off to a great start already.

"Then the artificial intelligence blah blah blah does some shit." - Lil' Wayne's iphone app is the technology of the future, you guys.

"So I won't have to rap anymore?" - God willing.

"So you're saying a machine can do anything that an artist or a group can do?" - Well not any artist - but this group specifically, yes.

"This is what is going to take the peas into 3008." - If "The Peas" are around 1000 years in the future, we all have much, much bigger things to worry about.

"It takes the soul out of it. We're not robots." - Except for that time we dressed up as robots and rode space elephants, and shit. But that was just keepin' it real. And awesome.

Black Eyed Peas New Music Video: We're Not Robots, We're Just Awful

Look, it's not that I'm against fun pop music, or The PEAS in general. I don't hate the tune. It's fun for what it is: an itunes top ten anthem. The dancin' was fancy fun times, plus this was 5,000 times more enjoyable than the last Transformers. Let The Peas direct Transformers 3: more robot riffs, less robot balls.

Maybe we're looking at it wrong. Maybe this whole break dancing robot show down is a meta-interpretation of the music industry today. Why else would they complain that computers are taking your jobs, and then use computers to repeat the one line you sing, in a auto tune robot voice? Well done, Peas - you've made Lady Gaga for idiots, which is saying something. Now scratch-loop that meerkat again and make sure Fergie holds that ray gun gangster style, what what!

Black Eyed Peas New Music Video: We're Not Robots, We're Just Awful

UPDATE: As I said in the comments and above I don't hate it, it's just a lot, a lot, a lot. I do like the silver speaker dancer people, you guys can come over anytime. Bring the suits.

Black Eyed Peas New Music Video: We're Not Robots, We're Just Awful