Become a vampire queen's slave and dream your own death, in this week's TV

This week's television includes some gems you might have missed, including Adventure Time, Warehouse 13 and True Blood. A woman dreams her own death and makes a documentary about it. Back To The Future is back! And much, much more.


Today:

It's clear, there can only be one pick of the day: Adventure Time, on the Cartoon Network at 8 PM! This show has been sneaking up on us with its previously unsuspected awesomeness for a while now. (Check out this clip from the spot-on Dungeons & Dragons spoof, thanks to Chris Sims for the heads up!) And tonight's episode features our hero, Finn, agreeing to become the henchman of the evil vampire queen Marceline. He has to do whatever she says, no matter what. But does she want to feed on sentient beings, or oats? Find out for yourself!

Also on the Cartoon Network: Scooby Doo: Mystery Inc. at 7 PM, Johnny Test at 7:30, and The Marvelous Misadventures of Flapjack at 8:30.

And then at 10 PM on Health, Mystery Diagnosis has "The Man Covered in Boils." Hopefully after you've already digested dinner. And VH1 has episode four of Scream Queens season two.

Movies:

Nickelodeon is showing Back To The Future for the first time ever, at 8 PM. Not sure if this is the cable TV premiere generally, or just the first time on Nickelodeon. Either way, it's always worth watching this gem again. And the second and third movies will be shown on the following nights. Here's a promo, sorry about the quality:

Also, The Simpsons Movie is on FX at 8 PM, and Big is on TVLand at 10 PM. Buffy the Vampire Slayer is on Encore at 9:40 PM, and Spider-Man 2 is on HBO at 7:45 PM.

Tuesday:

Today's pick of the day: PBS has a new episode of documentary film series POV at 10 PM (check your local listings), called "The Edge Of Dreaming." And yeah, it deals with dreams, in case you're still obsessed after watching Inception a half dozen times. Here's the fascinating blurb:

Scottish filmmaker Amy Hardie has built a career making science documentaries that reflect her rational temperament. When she dreamed one night that her horse was dying, only to wake the next morning and find the horse dead, she dismissed the incident as a coincidence. Then she dreamed she would die at age 48 - only one year away. When Hardie does get ill, just as the dream predicted, she visits neuroscience experts and eventually a shaman. The Edge of Dreaming is an evocative, intimate chronicle of that year and a fascinating investigation into the human subconscious.

And here's the trailer:

But if ominous dreams aren't your thing, Syfy also has another episode of Warehouse 13, a show that's been on a roll lately, at 9 PM. Will there be anything as great as last week's Timothy Leary glasses? You'll have to wait and see, but here's a sneak peek from this body-swapping episode:

Also, there's a new Unnatural History on the Cartoon Network at 8 PM:

And a new It's Effin Science on G4 at 9 PM.

Then at 10 PM, there's a new post-apocalyptic reality-show outing, with The Colony on Discovery, while National Geographic looks at Albino Murders.

And at 10:30 PM, IFC has another awesome episode of The IT Crowd!

Movies:

Starting around 12:30 PM, HBO has Monsters Vs. Aliens, The Dark Knight and The Time Machine, which is definitely an interesting mix. Nick At Nite is showing Back To The Future Part II at 8 PM. Also at 8: Dragonfly on Encore, in which a doctor believes his dead wife is trying to contact him, and The Box, in which we believe Richard Kelly is trying to tell us something, is on Cinemax.

At 2:00 AM Wednesday morning, USA is showing Children Of Men, and at 3 AM, TBS is showing the direct-to-DVD movie Get Smart's Bruce And Lloyd Out of Control, starring Masi Oka.

Wednesday:

It's all about the science programming — Science has a new Wonders Of The Solar System at 9, followed at 10 by two choices: Chasing Mummies on History, or the season finale of Monsters Inside Me on Animal Planet.

Or you could just watch Psych on USA, also at 10 PM.

Movies:

Nick At Nite has Back To The Future Part III at 8 PM, rounding out the trilogy and ending things with the now-famous child's obscene gesture.

Also at 9 PM, Disney has Underdog.

Thursday:

It's the season finale of Burn Notice on USA at 9 PM, and that's our pick of the day.

But also, there's yet another new Futurama, on Comedy Central at 10 PM. How can this week's episode top last week's insane body-switching sex and specially created mathematical theorems? Hard to imagine, but it does guest star Katee Sackhoff, plus creators Matt Groening and David X. Cohen, plus a Comic Con of the future.

The History Channel has a new episode of The Universe at 9 PM, followed by a new Stan Lee's Superhumans at 10.

Movies:

AMC is showing the original The Day The Earth Stood Still, Stargate, They Live and Virus, and it all starts at 9:30 AM. And then at 9 PM, Disney has The Incredibles, just so you can have it fresh in your mind to compare with the new show No Ordinary Family. Showtime has alternate history classic Inglorious Basterds at 8 PM. And then Unbreakable is on AMC at 10:30 PM.

Just after midnight, Encore starts showing Blindness, the slightly disappointing adaptation of Jose Saramago's classic novel. And if you can't sleep after watching that, you've got a choice between Batman and Robin on TBS or Arachnid on Syfy, at 3 AM. Also, HBO has Virtuosity at 4 AM and Encore has The Man With The Golden Gun at 4:30 AM.

Friday:

Our pick of the day is another new Eureka, "The Ex-Files," in which people from the past come back to haunt Carter and the rest of the gang. Here's the first promo video:

And then there's a new Haven on Syfy at 10 PM.

Movies:

Syfy is showing movies all day, the most interesting of which might be The Descent. The others are all ones Syfy has shown a lot lately. And at 11:45 AM, IFC has Miyazaki's Spirited Away. And Cinemax has The Fountain at noon and 9 at 3:20 PM. BBC America is showing Star Trek: Nemesis twice, at 5 PM and 8:30 PM. At 6:45 PM, Cinemax is playing Watchmen.

Your local Fox station may be showing Bruce Almighty, or at least that's what my local Fox station plans to air. Maybe there'll be a divine intervention in your area, though, to save you from the spectre of Jim Carrey gesticulating and doing that eyebrow thing while yelling "LOVE ME" at Jennifer Aniston. Also, at 10 PM, FX is showing My Super Ex-Girlfriend.

At 1 AM Saturday morning, AMC has Pet Sematary, and at 1:45 AM, it's a choice between Buffy The Vampire Slayer on Encore and Death Race (the Statham version) on Cinemax.

Saturday:

Today's pick of the day is probably HBO's cable TV premiere of The Time Traveler's Wife, the movie adaptation of Audrey Niffenegger's fantastic novel. It's not as good as the book, of course, but it's still got some great moments, and Eric Bana and Rachel McAdams bring a more light-hearted sensibility to the material, especially since some of the darker subplots have been cut. It's worth watching really just for the gorgeous visuals, bringing some of the novel's vivid imagery to life. Here's a trailer:

There's also another new Being Human on BBC America at 9 PM.

Movies:

ABC Family is showing The Nutty Professor and The Nutty Professor 2: The Klumps back to back starting at 7:30 AM, so wake up with Eddie's fatsuit. Syfy is once again showing movies all day, including Solar Attack and Meteor Apocalypse. At 3 PM, Telefutura is showing The Day After Tomorrow, in Spanish. At 4 PM, ION is showing Paycheck, the John Woo-directed Philip K. Dick adaptation that's nowhere near as good as those two names might suggest.

Sunday:

Tonight's new True Blood, "Fresh Blood," will have to hold you for two weeks — there's nothing but reruns the following Sunday — but luckily, it looks as though things are moving towards a climax already. Bill tries to rebuild his ties with Sookie, Eric plays mind games with Russell, and Crystal unloads something heavy on Tara.

And there's no new The Gates tonight — it'll be back next week, just as you're missing True Blood.

Movies:

TBS is showing Austin Powers in Goldmember at 9 AM. Just FYI. And at 10 AM, the Cartoon Network has the possibly more kid-friendly Scooby Doo! Abracadabra-Doo. Syfy is showing movies all day again, including Meteor and Asteroid. G4 has Teen Wolf at 8 PM, and ION has The Fifth Element at 9:30 PM.