We have no idea what's going to be the best movie of the year, but we have a pretty good notion what'll be the worst. Evil Bong 3-D: The Wrath of Bong is looking like this year's Troll 2. Spoilers...
Despite coming from direct-to-DVD auteurs Full Moon, Evil Bong 3-D is getting a theatrical release on — wait for it — April 20, or International Pot Day. Michael Bay may have gone to 3-D for Transformers 3, but the Evil Bong series is going one better — this film is being shot in "smell-o-vision" as well.
What's the plot of the film? We're glad you asked:
An evil alien bong crashes on earth. Its intent; world domination. Our stoner heroes are transported to the alien bong home world and held captive by nude alien beauties. Their only hope to escape and save planet earth; EBee, the original Evil Bong. The original whacked out cast of stoners from EVIL BONG 1 + 2 returns.
We've read a few pages of the script, and... wow. In one scene, a character gets a noxious green fuzz on his tongue after he touches it with hands that have been in contact with evil alien contaminated weed. There's also a scene where a character named Rabbit is held prisoner by evil alien chicks who are stealing his, umm... precious bodily fluids. And the script actually has directions for which "scratch 'n' sniff" scent should be used at this moment — "Clams & Oysters Scent." As Rabbit, the unfortunate victim, says, "Pretty soon, I'll be nothing but a dried-up banana husk." Something which we suspect will also be true for anyone who actually goes to see this film in the theaters.
Evil Bong 3-D: The Wrath of Bong comes out on 4/20.