The Vampire Sound of Music, Brought to Us by the Creator of the Zombie Beatles

The trend of remixing classic texts with horror elements keeps getting crazier. Case in point: Alan Goldsher, author of the "zombie Beatles" novel Paul Is Dead, returns with My Favorite Fangs, a book that reinvents Sound of Music with vampires.

He told us what to expect — including vampires bitchslapping Nazis.

According to the book's early blurb, in My Favorite Fangs, "Liesl von Trapp is a blood-thirsty sex-bomb, Captain von Trapp is a functional drunk, and Maria von Trapp is a 16,000 (going on 17,000) year-old vampire being tracked by the Nazi Undeath Squads."

Is this going to be similar to the remixes of Jane Austen and other texts?

Not really. The template for those projects tends to be take an existing text and add in the paranormal elements. "My Favorite Fangs" — which sports the subtitle of "The Hills Are Alive with the Sound of Sucking" — reimagines every aspect of "The Sound of Music," and is, in effect, a new entity unto itself, albeit one oozing with Sound-of-Music-ness. And blood.

How do you do a remix of a movie?

In this case, I'm putting a vampiric/parodic spin on every single aspect of the film, kind of like the "Star Wars" episodes of "Family Guy." For instance, in "The Sound of Music," the von Trapp kids are douchebags who become nice once they're transformed by Maria, but in the book, they're douchebags who become bigger douchebags once they're transformed into vampires.

Is the story of the Von Trapp family in the public domain?

My last remix book, "Paul Is Undead: The British Zombie Invasion," parodied the Beatles, and as far as we knew, the Fab Four and/or their estates were cool with the project, primarily because I treated the band with respect...albeit zombified respect. Despite the above douchebag comment, I'll be doing the same here, so we don't anticipate any problems.

Does Maria Von Trapp still become a nun at first?

Nope. She's an ancient vampire living in an Abbey full of zombies. Of course.

Are the Nazis like the good guys because they hunt vampires?

Nope. They're still Nazi dickheads. Especially Rolf, who's not only a Nazi dickhead, but also a Nazi pussy who gets bitchslapped by vampire slut Liesl von Trapp. And that pretty much sums up what "My Favorite Fangs" is about.