One of the great joys of watching science fiction and fantasy is to appreciate the unintentionally hilarious lines that come out of people's mouths sometimes. It's inevitable that when you're exploring mind-expanding premises and weird worlds, you're bound to run into some really insane conversations.
Sometimes our favorite movies and TV shows feature some hideously ridiculous dialogue. Sometimes nonsensical and melodramatic speech is part of why bad movies are such a guilty pleasure. Here are the 10 awesomest lines of unintentionally funny dialogue from science fiction and fantasy movies and television.
We asked everyone over on io9's Facebook page to suggest their favorite unintentionally funny dialogue from movies, and people came up with some great examples from television as well. Thanks to everyone who gave us side-splittingly funny suggestions! (We would have included "Not the bees!" from Wicker Man, but we're not sure if it counts as science fiction or fantasy.)
10. Mortal Kombat: Annihilation: "Mother, you're alive!" "Too bad... YOU will die!"
It's really all in the delivery. The video pretty much says it all.
9. Lord of the Rings: Legolas is Captain Obvious.
This line is so famous, it has a ton of tribute videos and remixes on Youtube, but here it is in its unadulterated version. Aragon painstakingly explains how they're going to create a diversion to distract Sauron, and then a lightbulb goes on over Legolas' pretty head. "A diversion!" he says, helpfully. (Thanks to Sunil and Caleigh for suggesting this one!)
8. Star Wars: Toschi Station Power Converters
Why do people love this line of dialogue so much? Is it the way that Luke talks about picking up power converters as the greatest treat in his otherwise meh existence, or just the whiny delivery? I think it's the whiny delivery, actually. Another great candidate from the original Star Wars: "You came in that thing? You're braver than I thought!" (Thanks Brett, Kimber, Jeff and Tim!)
7. Star Crash — "Imperial Battleship, halt the flow of time!"
Wait, what? Star Crash is one of our favorite movies, and we love the new DVD set, but we're constantly rediscovering the marvelousness of Roger Corman's Star Wars knock-off. And we love the idea of an imperial battleship that comes equipped with a time-flow-halterater. (Thanks, Christian!)
6. Blade Runner: "She's trained for an off-world kick murder squad. Talk about Beauty and the Beast — she's both."
Bryant, describing one of the deadly Replicants to Deckard, utters this immortal line, which you can hear here, or at 3:44 in the above video (which isn't embeddable.) There's noir, and then there's over-the-top cheese, and this line goes over. (Thanks Michael!)
5. 2012: "The neutrinos are mutating!"
You have to love a disaster movie that doesn't just fly in the face of science, but pisses in the face of science too. The last minute or so of this video is toothache-inducingly stupid. (Sure, Doctor Who gave us "reverse the polarity of the neutron flow," but this is better. Or worse.) This line has become so famous, it has its own awesome T-shirt. Another great candidate from an Emmerich film: "I think we've hit a critical desalinization point," from Day After Tomorrow. (Thanks Paul and Jennifer!)
4. Star Wars: Almost every line from the prequels.
Especially Padme's "I'm not afraid to die... I've been dying a little bit each day since you came back into my life." And Anakin's "Love can't save you, Padme. Only my new powers can." Oh, and "You killed the younglings!" Oh, and "Good call, my young Padawan!" But really, almost any line of dialogue from the prequel trilogy, especially any scene with Anakin and Padme, is side-splitting despite all of George Lucas' lofty ambitions. (Thanks, Ariel, Sean, Andrew, Jennifer, Clinton, Jack and Landy!)
3. Star Trek: Voyager, "Get the cheese to sickbay"
We couldn't resist including this classic bit of dialogue, which pretty much sums up all seven years of Star Trek: Voyager in four seconds. The deadpan line delivery is part of what makes it so lovely. There's also Spock's "Brace yourself. The area of penetration will no doubt be sensitive" from "The Immunity Syndrome." "His brain... is gone!" from "Spock's Brain." And Spock's "The women!" in "The Cage," the original pilot. (Thanks Toby, Tim, The Sci Fi Show and Polly!)
2. Flash Gordon, "Not the Boreworms!"
I know how she feels. I fucking hate boreworms. They're boring. And wormy. Also great: "He'll execute your whole perverted secret police force." Oh, and of course, "Gordon's alive?!" Actually, almost any line where someone has to say "no, not the ______" often becomes unintentionally hilarious. Witness Doctor Who's "No, not the Mind Probe" from "The Five Doctors."
1. Amazing Spider-Man, "Yes, Peter. I am you and you are me and this is a gun."
I have to admit, I found this line because someone had labeled it "best worst line in screenwriting history" on Youtube. Which seems like cheating, somehow. But it's too astonishingly great not to include. There's the Beatles shoutout and the sort of Zen quality to it all. There's the fact that the whole Clone Saga boils down to just this fantastic moment. But most of all, there's the completely deadpan, bored way in which Evil Peter recites his line, like he can't wait to kill Good Peter so he can go eat some grits.
Runners up include "Inspector Detector suspected foul play" from Speed Racer, "Take the fucking elephant!" from Darkman, "But why would the benevolent Dr. Cocteau send such a brute savage into our midst?" from Demolition Man, and almost every line of dialogue from Plan 9 from Outer Space.