Just as restaurants have guides informing patrons how to perform the Heimlich Maneuver, in 1999, the creators of the eschatologically inclined Left Behind series made this video, Have You Been Left Behind?

This nominally handy instructional video is narrated by one of the book's fictional pastors (who incidentally is not left behind) a twist that wouldn't make me feel very secure in case the Rapture actually was a-brewing outside my window. I don't call Harry Potter when I need wizard advice — no, I call my neighborhood accredited warlock in the Yellow Pages. In any case, this reminds me of The Pre-Taped Call-In Show.

[Via Everything is Terrible]