In Wizard School, the Chosen One is a middle-aged douchebag

If young adult novels teach us anything, it's that the fated hero who battles back evil will be a child with a pure heart. Given that those meddling kids are always thwarting their plans for world domination, wouldn't it be easier if those would-be world conquerors loaded the dice of fate and ensured that someone less than worthy got the mark of destiny? Maybe an adult who care more about models and bottles than the wonders of magic?

Writer Kevin Kneupper and artist Robert Rath create Wizard School as a parody of Harry Potter and similar stories of magical child heroes. The students of Bumblebane's Magical Academy for the Wizarding Arts have been locked in a struggle with an ancient, demonic enemy, who, unfortunately for them, is pretty damn genre-savvy. You ever wonder why no one ever brings a gun to a wand fight? So does he.

He's also got a plan to keep those kiddies in check while he plots his evil. Every few generations, the wizard kids get themselves a chosen one, someone marked with magical stars around their temple who is destined to fight the forces of darkness. So our villain decides to counterfeit himself up a chosen one of his own choosing.

That's where Russell Graham comes in. Russell's a corporate raider who loves his life of one-night stands, cocaine, and mocking poor people. But one night, he tries to pick up the wrong girl and wakes up at Bumblebane's with a hangover and a starry tattoo across his face. Now, instead of a Maserati, he's got a talking goat familiar (naturally named Goatsie), and instead of an unlimited bank account, he's got magic classes. And he's hardly filled with childlike wonder.

The question is, what comes next? Will Russell's obsession with booze, sex, and drugs be just the thing to vanquish evil forever? Or will Russell decide that joining forces with the bad guys is the best way to return to the luxuries of his old life?

[Wizard School]