io9 Roundup: January 29, 2012WHAT IF WONDER WOMAN WAS A DISNEY PRINCESS? | Diana doesn't need a prince, even if they do make good cover models. By Bill Walko, of the webcomic The Hero Business (via reddit).


io9 Roundup: January 29, 2012The world's oldest "Yo mama" joke is 3,500 years old

Around 1,500 BCE, a student in ancient Babylon inscribed six riddles on a tablet. 3,500 years later, these proto-jokes lose a lot in the translation, but one thing's for sure: the Babylonians are saying something about your mother. More »


io9 Roundup: January 29, 2012The Capitol architect wanted to reanimate George Washington's dead body

George Washington may have been America's first president, but was he nearly America's first zombie-in-chief? If William Thornton, physician and designer of the US Capitol, had had his way, Washington's body would have been subjected a scientific experiment designed to bring the deceased former president back to life. More »


io9 Roundup: January 29, 2012Why the Avengers shouldn't text

Joss Whedon loves to remind us that the Avengers are just one big dysfunctional family, and if there's one thing that family does, it's send horrible text messages to one another. More »


io9 Roundup: January 29, 2012Saturday Morning Cartoons – Ben Kenobi on the run from Anakin & the return of Frankenhole!

In this week's installment of Saturday Morning Cartoons we see Mary Shelley's Frankenhole return for season two, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic return to SMC due to popular demand, and we take a quick look at one of my favorite HBO cartoons. More »


io9 Roundup: January 29, 2012What scientists say in research papers vs. What they actually mean

There's a secret code hiding in many a scientific research paper, but it's not the key to immortality or a way to turn maple syrup into rocket fuel. No, it's the code that tells you precisely what was going through the researcher's head as he or she was writing the paper. More »


io9 Roundup: January 29, 2012Fringe gives us the creepiest mother figure this side of Jessica Lange

In a TV season that already gave us Jessica Lange's unique approach to motherhood on American Horror Story, it's hard to imagine that any other maternal figure could even compete. More »


io9 Roundup: January 29, 2012Portal turrets channel The Nightmare Before Christmas with "This is Aperture"

Those Portal turrets really aren't such bad robots. After all, it's not their fault that they're programmed to shoot you in the face. Everyone's favorite guilt-tripping sentinels get into the gleeful spirit with "This is Aperture," an ode to the puzzle-filled test facility sung to the tune of The Nightmare Before Christmas's "This is Halloween." More »


io9 Roundup: January 29, 2012Alex Pardee turns the world's greatest superheroes into freakish monsters

We've long been fans of Alex Pardee's nightmarish artwork. We've seen his children-digesting monster installation, his horrifying dream beasties, and his post-apocalyptic web series about a block-headed alien. More »


io9 Roundup: January 29, 2012Read Alien, retold from the cat's perspective

Only one character in Alien has the wits and wherewithal to survive to the end of the movie at Ripley's side: Jones the cat. While everyone else on Nostromo was screaming like chickens with their chests ripped open, Jones exhibited the cool becoming a cat. More »


io9 Roundup: January 29, 2012Dress up as your favorite Power Ranger with custom-made hoodies

Once upon a time, my brother and I entered a Power Rangers/VR Troopers trivia contest on Prodigy. TV junkies that we were, we handily answered all the questions, but, sadly, when our names came up in the drawing, we received the inferior VR Troopers action figures instead of the much cooler, dino-centric Power Rangers dolls. It's probably a good thing that my 13-year-old self didn't have access to one of these custom-made Power Rangers hoodies, or she would have spent the next four years dressed as Trini. More »


io9 Roundup: January 29, 2012Concept Art Writing Prompt: Gentleman Godzilla goes out for a stroll

Fire up your keyboards, kids; it's time for another Concept Art Writing Prompt. This week's writing prompt features a familiar character: the one, the only Godzilla. More »


io9 Roundup: January 29, 2012Speed archer could dominate the Hunger Games

If your name is ever called up in The Hunger Games reaping, you should consider training with Russian archer Iza Privezenceva. This speedy shooter could pump arrows into a muttation faster than you could say "Katniss Everdeen." Privezenceva's weapon of choice is the recursive bow. More »


io9 Roundup: January 29, 2012Read the speech Nixon prepared in case the Apollo 11 astronauts died on the moon

The 1969 moon landing was one of humanity's most impressive achievements, but there was always a chance that things could go terribly wrong. But if the worst happened, and Neil Armstrong and Buzz Aldrin were commended to the void of space, Nixon had a stirring speech prepared, one that celebrated the spirit of exploration and the nobility of our lunar dreams. More »


io9 Roundup: January 29, 2012Hey, who ripped open a hole in the universe?

This eerie patch of blackness in the middle of a busy star cluster may look like a rather misshapen black hole, but it's actually something even stranger. More »