The Star Wars movies are all getting re-released in theaters in 3D, starting with Phantom Menace. It's your perfect chance to relive the agony of the prequels, only more in your face this time.

Not surprisingly, George Lucas is courting the only audience he can: little kids. In this ridiculous trailer, a narrator desperately tries to Honey Badger his way into making this movie kid-friendly. Can't wait until the kids get a load of Qui-Gon Jinn's hilarious Trade Federation banter! Watch this trailer, and weep for future generations.