With the world ending in a few months, expect to see do-it-yourself survivalists soon lug their homemade survival arks/pods/lead-lined armoires equipped with fourteen bags of Bugles out of their garages/barns/He-Man Woman Haters Clubhouses.
But Chinese inventor Yang Zongfu is ahead of the curve with his bright yellow "Noah's Ark," a 13-foot-diameter ball that — according to its creator — boasts room for three people, a year's worth of food and water, three weeks worth of oxygen when sealed, and 75 airbags to make Armageddon the smoothest of rides. (Basically, it can survive any end-of-the-world scenario, save a runaway black hole and maybe the Fenris wolf's digestive tract.)
To test his gyroscopic savior sphere — which took two years and $1.5 million yuan (approximately $236,000) — the inventor claims he slammed it with motor vehicles at speeds of 60 miles per hour (the would-be wasteland warriors inside barely noticed, he says).
But to truly demonstrate the might of his banana-colored survival ball, Yang boarded Noah's Ark and launched himself down a 164-foot slope, like an American Gladiators episode gone series-endingly awry. He emerged triumphant and unharmed, his mouth bloody from a "seatbelt cut."
Kudos on him for not turning into human gazpacho, but color me truly impressed when he finally figures out how to stuff walruses, water buffalos, and manatees on this rig, two-by-two.