Finally, a geological timescale that only a Creationist could love

According to a strict interpretation of Scripture, the Earth is approximately 6,000 years old (give or take a few years). Given what we know about our planet's geological past, it's only fitting that a chart be prepared to align this history with the actual dates involved. The result: A rapid-fire sequence of events that only a true Creationist could appreciate — or understand.

Finally, a geological timescale that only a Creationist could love

So, looking at the chart, it appears that humanity made its appearance just in time for the Obama administration (there's an irony in there I can't quite put my finger on...), and the dinosaurs went extinct just as the first transatlantic telephone call was made from New York to London.

Looker yet even deeper into our epically long 6,000 year geologic history, the Triassic period coincided with the European Enlightenment, and the New World was discovered by Columbus sometime during the Devonian era (I wonder if he saw any tiktaaliks walking fishes — oh, wait, there weren't any humans yet...my head is starting to hurt).

Lastly, and looking at the very dawn of time, Jesus lived during the Mesoproterozoic era, a mere 1,200 years before the end of the age that started it all, the Archean.

More seriously, it's charts like these that show us how ridiculous — and perilous — it is to ignore the findings of science. If you're going to make extraordinary claims drawn from a literal interpretation of Scripture, you're also going to have to reconcile it against centuries of scientific due diligence. Click here to see the full chart.

H/t Mindat.org via Science-Based Life.