TV Recap: Wimmins Need Protecting, on Revolution

After the collapse of civilization, there's going to be one question on everybody's mind: Can you protect your wimmins? The defenseless wimminsfolk are going to be in need of some strong protectin', in this rough and ready frontier world. Last night's episode of Revolution was all about women who need to be rescued, and how Google Boy finally mans up after all.

Spoilers ahead…

Actually, to be fair, Revolution has given us more than its fair share of tough female characters, and Aaron makes the point over and over again that Norah is worth more than he is because she can actually fight and blow stuff up. And the thing that Charlie needs to be rescued from is, at least in part, murdering an innocent man. And you could argue that the episode was actually criticizing Aaron's belief that he needed to be able to protect his wife.

But still - you know it's going to be a wacky episode when in the first five minutes, you meet two different dudes who treat chicks like property. First Sebastian Monroe offers Danny some ladies, as just one of the amenities available in the House of Monroe. And then Drexel, the scummy drug lord, cackles about burying himself in tail. You know someone's a bad guy when he treats women like disposable entertainment items.

But the bulk of the episode is about Google Boy and his relationship with women - which I think we're supposed to sympathize with a lot more than we probably actually do. This show really wants Google Boy to be a major sympathetic character, and so far it's not quite working - although he wins major points for the ending of this episode. Google Boy is so one dimensional that attempting to deepen his character just means drawing the single line over and over again, until you tear through the paper. He needs to start growing some more interesting quirks like so many of Eric Kripke's creations on Supernatural - get his Chuck the Prophet on.

In any case, we already knew that Google Boy was married, before the blackout, and he had an awesome wife who didn't care about his wealth or power. In a series of flashbacks, last night's episode gives us more of the backstory - a big chunk of "Sex and Drugs" was given over to showing us what happened to Google Boy after the blackout. We see that he spoiled his wife, who he obviously thought was only with him because of his wealth and company jet, and after everything went down the tubes he was suddenly not able to provide for her - luckily, they hook up with another dude, who's tall and handsome and competent and keeps saving Mrs. Google Boy when he fails to. First, she has dysentery, then later they're attacked by ruffians who nearly carry her off. At last, Google Boy decides to leave her behind, because she is better off without him.

So in the present day, Norah is injured and in bad shape - just like Mrs. Google Boy in the flashbacks. Miles decides the best option for Norah to get medical care is to take her to the drug lord who he used to be in bed with when he was a general. But Drexel, being a television drug lord, is a psychopath who plays mind games. And he forces Charlie to go off and kill some Irish patriarch, who torched Drexel's poppy plants. The Irish patriarch, it transpires, had a daughter who ran off to join the heroin circus and died, and he's basically as pure and decent as Drexel is terrible and awful. (He loves his granddaughter, etc. etc.) Nobody stops to consider that Charlie will probably be killed five minutes after she offs Irish Patriarch, until Drexel spells it out in big neon letters for them. BA-ZOING!

So first Google Boy is unable to stop Charlie going off to kill Irish Patriarch, and then he decides that Charlie is his family. (What is it with everybody thinking Charlie is their family? She never seems to think any of them are her family.) So he convinces Ben to go after Charlie, and he will protect Norah, somehow - the way he failed to protect his wife. It's like full circle, man.

In the end, Google Boy does protect Norah. When Drexel tells them to shoot each other and whoever survives gets to life, Google Boy offers himself as a sacrificial lamb. When that doesn't work, he shoots himself - but it's a trick, and he shoots Drexel. Which is the first time Google Boy is someone we root for, really. And meanwhile, Miles is just in time to stop Charlie killing the Irish Patriarch, so all's well, I guess.

Oh, and earlier in the episode, Charlie takes a bath and thinks about how everybody leaves her, and then tears up some postcards in rage. Later, as if that needed explanation, she says that she's realized life is not a bunch of pretty postcards. Good to know!

And meanwhile, back in Monroe-land, Sebastian greets Danny and offers him the aforementioned amenities. Then he promotes Tom Neville to Major and puts him in charge of interrogations, and says ominously that he's sending Strauser to get the magic necklace, plus Miles. We know Strauser is bad news because Tom's son Jason freaks out over his habit of not leaving survivors, plus Strauser gives a long speech about butchery and how killing is awesome.

And then Danny is finally put on a random park bench someplace with his mom.. which hopefully means next week's episode is going to be her explaining a whole mess of stuff.