Back in 2009, we started keeping tabs on the terrible, horrible things that started trundling out on the internet shortly after the peak of Twilight fandom. And as the years passed, the Twilight merchandise only got weirder. Cold sparkle dildos, Edward-shaped body pillows, and now bloody Bella tampon tea. Yep we've seen it all. This weekend the Twilight franchise comes to a conclusion with Breaking Dawn: Part 2, and it's with heavy hearts that we offer up our final installment of The Most Disturbing Twilight Products. Here's our final wrap up of the very best actual things you can buy to celebrate what Edward's penis may (or may not) feel like.
Here it is, years and years of the best of the worst Twilight products, plus some all-new horrors too. Ready your Vampire Sparkle Lube!
Please God No WHY, Twilight Merchandise
Even More Truly Terrible Twilight Merchandise
And just like that, Twilight was gone forever. We will miss your broods, your tiny tween biceps and strange naked shaved horse torso. We will miss your hairless wolf pack with exploding jean shorts. But most of all we will miss the creepy crafts this juggernaut inspired.
Special Thanks To Caitlin Petrakovitz and Julia Carusillo.