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My painful memories are life lessons and changes (for the better) to my persona not that I want to go through them AGAIN.
What's the damn point in learning/living if you don't deal with the emotional pain of your screwups and learn from your mistakes?
ReplySure, we all learn from our pain and fear. But something that can reprogram us to not behave like blithering idiots when faced with something that scares us apeshit, then that might be a good thing. I'm all for remembering the second boyfriend, because those memories teach me what I don't want in the future and how to avoid situations like that in the future. I could lose the fear of asphyxiation based on a real life event, though.
ReplyI think so. Emotional pain is a symptom not the cause of deeper issues.
I know more than a few folks who can't face their real problems because they want to avoid the pain of actually facing up to their problems/mistakes/who they really are.
ReplyJust to add one thing.
I used to hide from my pain (denial mostly and sometimes booze) too rather than face who I was. In my mid 20s, I screwed up my life in such a way that I had nowhere to hide from it. It was a very unpleasant 10 months (not jail.)
I did not enjoy the experience one damned bit, but I stopped blaming everyone but myself for my problems.
ReplySo it's not like you won't remember the painful memory; it just wont feel painful anymore. That doesn't mean that you will forget how painful it used to feel.
Replyin point of fact, denial and booze were not methods for hiding from pain they were methods to hide from the problem by pretending it didn't exist and killing brain cells respectively. there's a huge difference between self medicating with delusions and alcohol and psychotherapeutic techniques like removing a pavlovian response to a special song or place.
pain is necessary because it tells us when something is wrong, physically or emotionally, but once the problem has be properly diagnosed the pain is no longer necessary.
ReplyThis reasoning is exactly why I'd want certain painful memories to be erased - because I'm tired of going through them again.
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