Last year NBC unleashed a hate-watching miracle upon the masses in the form of a terribly acted and horribly performed Live Sound of Music production starring Carrie Underwood and Vampire Bill from True Blood. Next up? Peter Pan, and we've already lined up the perfect famous/non-famous cast.

Robert Greenblatt of NBC recently announced [via Collider] that NBC's next live musical victim would be Peter Pan.

Next December 4th, we will broadcast a new live production of the Broadway musical Peter Pan. NBC has a history with the show, which even I didn't know. In 1955, the Broadway production, which was doing great business, closed in order for the whole cast to do a live broadcast of it on NBC from a studio in Manhattan, and it was in color, which was a novelty back then. 65 million people tuned in. It was so successful that, a year later, NBC did another live production with the same cast. And then in 1960, they did it again, this time starring Mia Farrow. Craig Zadan and Neil Meron will be back producing again for us, and we'll be announcing a cast as soon as we get it. Get ready for flying children and some kind of state-of-the-art light technology for little Tinker Bell.

The 1955 production starring Mary Martin as the boy who never grew up is perhaps one of our favorite, cheese ball translations of this fairy tale. And with that production in mind (because why not resurrect a totally dated nightmare production starring an adult woman) we've already cast the whole thing for NBC. You're welcome.

Here is our proposed cast for NBC's all live Peter Pan musical:

Selena Gomez as Peter Pan.

We've Cast NBC's Live Peter Pan Musical for Your Hate-Watching PleasureS

Lea Michele as Wendy Darling.

Jaden Smith as John Darling.

Kellan Lutz as Michael Darling.

We've Cast NBC's Live Peter Pan Musical for Your Hate-Watching PleasureS

Ashlee Simpson as Tiger Lily.

We've Cast NBC's Live Peter Pan Musical for Your Hate-Watching PleasureS

Joey Fatone as Captain Hook/Mr. Darling (for continuity's sake we'll keep this double casting the same.)

We've Cast NBC's Live Peter Pan Musical for Your Hate-Watching PleasureS

Blake Shelton as Nana.

We've Cast NBC's Live Peter Pan Musical for Your Hate-Watching PleasureS

BOOM.