I know, I know - you weren't able to catch the last pod out through the wormhole and now you're stuck on Earth for the holiday season. So what will you do while you're here? Mostly, you'll engage in an orgy of consumerism mingled with true generosity. Also, you'll party.

Here you'll see all of io9's suggestions for what to shop for when you're trapped on the old Blue Marble during holiday season. And a few tips on how to party, too.

Sorry we can't join you — we'll be watching a supernova light show from the lake on Zondort. Wish you were here!

Art by Ron Miller