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It's not just the hideous special effects, although those are pretty terrible — especially the closeups of pilots' faces while random rear-projection saucers float around behind them. It's not just the hideous acting, especially the guy who puts way too much processed cheese into lines like, "It's not easy to get away from me." No, it's the fact that you can't tell what the hell is going on half the time during this space battle. More »
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Would you believe that StarCrash, the ridonkulous space opera starring Caroline Munro and David Hasselhoff, was even campier before it was edited for U.S. release? The masterful new 2-DVD set includes loads of deleted scenes, including this batshit supervillain moment. More »
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Kodos comes to a coffee plantation to lay hundreds of alien eggs, so his offspring can bust out of people Ridley Scott-style. And women can't resist walking towards Kodos' glowing eye. It all leads to the funniest death scene ever. More »
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The Italians created two awesome Star Wars clones in 1979: the David Hasselhoff-in-eyeliner movie Star Crash (which we featured a while back), and this movie, The Humanoid. It stars Richard Kiel ("Jaws" from the James Bond movies) as a super-soldier — who decapitates like eight guys by throwing one pylon in this clip. It also has some of the best Darth Vader dialog ever, a robot dog named Robodog, a psychic Jedi-child, and an evil queen who has to absorb the juices of one topless young fashion model every day to stay young. The directors of Star Crash and The Humanoid had an undying rivalry, that endured 23 years later, when one of them was working in a gift shop. More »
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The Hoff, wearing buckets of makeup, fences with killer bots in Star Crash. The worst of the late 70s Star Wars knockoffs, Crash features lots of Harryhausen-style stop motion animation alongside widescreen space battles. Caroline Munroe has really shiny hair and low-cut tops. But my favorite character is the Southern-accented android (Hamilton Camp), who looks like Darth Vader but is named Elle and wears a rainbow flag on the back of his belt. Click through for a video of the climactic battle and Elle's daring escape. More »
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