Heroes - Sylar Sex Switcheroo

Sylar is having fake sex with Matt Parkman's wife, meanwhile we dry heave in the corner at sight of Sylar's sexy face.

Kyle XY - Drunk Dance Rapping

In the midst of a terrible montage of Kyle and his boys getting their drank on, one moment of pure WTF-ness stands out, when the gang attempts to half rap. I think even the crew was embarrassed for them.

Smallville - Twitter Torture

Chloe wields her mighty power of the delete key.

Stargate Universe - Boob Lens

The moment that angered the masses - who needs a plot when you can frame the shot against one character's giant rack? Need to change it up? Frame the shot with her underwear.

Battlestar Galactica - Cry-Painting

Possibly the worst scene to come out of BSG is Adama's cry-painting moment. Mixing fear, awkwardness and general horror, we sat and watched our mighty leader have a fit in a bucket of paint like a 5-year-old who's been given a time-out.

Lost - Ben's Smoke Monster Home Movie

After years of wondering what the smoke monster would look like one-on-one it's finally revealed! Sadly it's a lot like watching home movies in your chain smoking Uncle's basement.

Fringe - Peter Knows Everything

We're on board for Walter knowing everything, but when you lump Peter on top, come on - now you're just being a dick.

Eastwick - Vibrator Talky Talk

Women and their vibrators, we just can't stop talking about them in public at a family fair outside with co-workers. We can't help it! Vibrators Vibrators Vibrators, oh and we name them after real people we work with, naturally.

Torchwood - "I'm BAAAAACK"

Nothing like ruining an otherwise well directed, edited and written special Torchwood series with some crappy shtick. You just can't help yourself can you Torchwood?

Vampire Diaries - You Need Death

Ah Damon, you old over-dramatic softie. Now, tell us some more about you vampire man jewelry.

Dollhouse - Diva or DIIIIIIIVA?

First off that singing, my god, plus this meant we had to listen to said "freedom" song over, and over, and over. Second, what is the difference between a Diva and a DIIIIIVA?

V - "I'm a cool Mom"

Juliet is hip with the teen scolding lingo - also if your child is "tagging" things but has no real talent and is a rich suburban know-nothing, do yourself a favor: drop him down a well.

Dr. Who - The Master Is Hungry

All. The. Time.

The Prisoner - The Prisoner In Its Entirety

This clip pretty much sums up what we feel was accomplished or learned in The Prisoner reboot, nothing.

True Blood - Goodbye Godric

Watch as the ancient vampire Godric Quantum Leaps himself to death. So long, fey baby vamp.

These posters of well known scifi shows (and a few purely geeky shows) like The X-Files, True Blood, and MacGyver were envisioned by Austrian designer Exergian, and are sold as archival giclee prints via Blanka for £50.00 or $80.

By Exergian

By Exergian

By Exergian

By Exergian

By Exergian

By Exergian

By Exergian

By Exergian

By Exergian

By Exergian

Song parody writer the great Luke Ski is the musical brains behind Battlestar Rhapsody, which is set to appropriate clips here by YouTuber nnaylime.

[via /Film]

Get The Nostalgia While The Nostalgia Getting's Good
The failure of Jennifer's Body at the box office punctured the myth of Megan Fox, but in doing so left Transformers: Revenge Of The Fallen's epic success even more inexplicable. You mean that everyone who went to see that genuinely wanted to see giant robots fighting for the right to appear in a story that made sense instead of Megan Fox's ass? Really? (To be fair, maybe it was John Tuturro's ass they couldn't resist.) Of course not; they wanted to relive memories of their childhood/the first Transformers movie/the Go-Bots by proxy. Same reason that Star Trek was such a hit, and the dismal Terminator Salvation made money at all. The problem with this for movie studios is that there's only a limited number of things to be nostalgic about, and they're burning through them quickly (Next year's Tron Legacy and The A-Team show that we're already up to the mid-'80s); when there're already plans to reboot Battlestar Galactica as a movie franchise months after its conclusion as a (rebooted) television show and restarting the Fantastic Four movies from scratch just a few years after the failure of Rise Of The Silver Surfer, you can tell that there's nervousness. With good reason; the lawsuit over the rights to Superman show that nostalgia could get more expensive for filmmakers in years to come. Maybe one day, Disney's $4 Billion buyout of Marvel Entertainment's IP will look like a bargain.

Find A Voice With Something To Say, Then Let It Speak
2009 was a year of extremes when it came to the creation of movies and television that didn't (entirely) rely on IP graverobbing. On the one hand, it was the year when the phrase "production hiatus" became widely known as code for "The Powers That Be don't like what's being done and are about to 'fix' it" as the trains seemed to come off the usually-smoother-running TV production track more often, and more publicly, than usual (See: Dollhouse, FlashForward and V, which has had two such hiatuses, and "coincidentally" switched showrunners twice, as well). On the other, it was the year when smaller movies like District 9 and Moon garnered critical acclaim - and, in the case of D9, a pretty amazing box office haul - for being individual, unusual and something other than generic production line blockbusters. Avatar, too, is being hailed for being the singular vision of James Cameron and, maybe most importantly, that being a good thing. Maybe this was the year that started a renaissance in an appreciation for the auteur theory after all?

On Television, Burying The Lede Will Kill You
We've said this more than once recently, but the fact that Dollhouse's second season was promoted to critics with its lackluster first episode may have damaged the show's chances irreparably. You can't blame the promotions people, because it makes sense to sell something based on the product itself; the "blame" lies with those making the show, who thought that they had the time and space to ramp up the season slowly, reiterating the central concept of the series with episodes that (sadly) repeated the rhythm of the first season. As the creative teams behind V (Put on hiatus after its first four episodes, and before we'd even seen a complete lizard reveal and/or any rodent eating) and the upcoming Day One (Restructured from a full season to a four episode mini-series to test the waters for a regular show) can attest to, there's no time for a slow build on network television anymore. Both Fringe and FlashForward sped up their timetables to try and meet demand for near-instant gratification, and both are still dogged with rumors of cancellation. Remember, television people: Put your best foot forward immediately.

Goodbyes Should Always Be Brief
Yes, yes: We loved Russell T Davies' run on Doctor Who as much as anyone, but the year of special episodes seemed weighed down by a sense of its own self-importance that reached epic proportions during this weekend's "The End of Time, Part One" (On the plus side, Now we know that Barack Obama will save the world with his economic announcement or something. Not that that'll seem horribly dated, oh, anytime after February 2009). Battlestar Galactica, too, approached epic levels of pomp and pretension during its final days. It's not that we would rather have rushed either show offstage unfinished, but there's something to be said for brevity and not getting too wrapped up in your own ego. Lost, consider yourself on notice.

Just Because You Can Doesn't Mean You Should
One word: Watchmen. Yes, we get it; we have the technology to make Doctor Manhattan look like he exists in a particularly shiny version of reality. But, months after all the hype, hoopla and multiple versions on DVD, it's still worth asking: Did Watchmen gain anything from the transition from comic to movie? Besides Zack Snyder's bank account, did anything? Sometimes it's okay to leave the original alone.

(Note: some of these scenes contain spoilers and / or some serious violence. Beware!)

Serenity

Serenity is Joss Whedon's sort-of-final-chapter for his much beloved television series, Firefly. But it's also a stand-alone story, offering any new viewers a chance to discover the crew and the world of the show anew. And what better way to throw a new audience into the world than a wandering tour of Serenity herself. In the opening shot of the movie, Whedon uses a long-take to fully draw us into his world. You can watch the first minute and a half of the six minute masterpiece here.

X-Files - Triangle

In this episode of the X Files, most of the on-screen action is depicted in a series of long takes and uncut sequences. There are some edits, but they are disguised to make the whole episode feel seamless. And the effect is pretty impressive.

Oldboy

It's not strictly sci-fi, but the action-filled, vengeance-fueled martial arts epic, Oldboy, has garnered a lot of praise for its unflinching take on violence and anger. That's pretty evident in this fight scene. It includes a hallway, a giant gang, and an enraged man with a hammer. And it's visceral impact is heightened by the fact that it all takes place in one seamless take.

Children of Men

Children of Men is a movie that relies on the long single take for a couple of breathtaking scenes, including the particularly moving one from which the picture above comes. But the one that is most impressive is the roadway assault scene. Watching it, its brilliance isn't immediately clear. It's not until you realize that there's no way a camera could fit inside the car that you realize the casual scene took enormous innovation and patience to pull off.

Contact

The introduction to Contact serves as a quick reminder that the universe could be an empty place that is entirely indifferent to humanity. It's almost like a counterpoint to the rest of the story that follows. And it's accomplished with a tracking "shot." It's technically a visual effect, but the purpose is clear, and it's accomplished relatively seamlessly.

Battlestar Galactica

As with Serenity, Battlestar Galactica needed to find a way to draw in the audience and show them the characters and the world they would be a part of for the rest of the series. In one of the earliest scenes in the miniseries, we get just that: a long tracking shot through the interior of the ship, showing us most of the important players of the rest of the series. A fitting beginning to a show that aimed to do things with space opera that were as-yet untried.

Cloverfield

Cloverfield's main conceit was that it was found footage, mostly untouched, from one long night of filming. As a result, most of the film is meant to look like a one-take sequence. You could choose any sequence from the movie, but this one is particularly terrifying, since being confined to one point of view makes the danger seem even more close and real.

Shaun of the Dead

The beauty of the long take in Shaun of the Dead is not the artistry of the camera movement or its length. It's that the same tracking shot was done twice, once before the zombie outbreak and once after. At the :40 mark in this video, you can see the two takes intercut with each other, showing just how carefully the two scenes were constructed.

This list is by no means exhaustive. What are your favorite long-takes in sci-fi cinema in television? Did we forget any greats?

Sold Out: Harry Potter And The Half Blood Prince Toys or DVD
Instead: Homemade Butter Beer

Can't find the right Harry Potter DVD or wand? Quick - brew up some of your own Butter Beer. There are over 10 Recipes right here. Plus it's cheap and people will think you care more because you made it with your hands.

Not Out Yet: Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs DVD
Instead: Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs The Book

Judi Barrett and Ron Barrett's childrens' book is a classic tale. If you wanted to give the DVD, only to find it won't be out until January, give the book instead. It's inexpensive and a wonderful hardback children's book any light-hearted person would enjoy, kids or no kids.

Sold Out: Star Wars Clone Wars Toys
Instead: Knit Your Own Leia Wig

I'm not sure how fast you can knit, but just try to start the project and you're in the clear. Heck maybe it can be "a project the both of you work on." The pattern is available at Etsy.
But if knitting is too complicated, try these Star Wars papercraft models. Nothing sweeter than waking up Christmas morning to a house filled with Star Wars decorations.

Not Out Yet: Jennifer's Body DVD
Instead: Jennifer's Body Earrings

Any monster movie fan will love you for these jewelry nods to the horror flick. It's like secret cosplay - only the "cool kids" will get the reference. And they are a cute and inventive alternative to the DVD, which fans will most likely purchase themselves. Worst case scenario, you can pick up the Jennifer's Body soundtrack which has tracks by Screeching Weasel, and of course, the film's warbling emo ballad: Low Shoulder's "Through The Trees."

Earrings available at ETSY soundtrack available at Amazon.

Not Available: David Tennant
Instead: The Original Doctor Who Scarf

What better way to remind or console a David Tennant Doctor Who fan than with a homemade reminder that there have been plenty of other Doctors who have regenerated over the years, and that this fan pain too will pass? This Doctor Who Scarf Website has just about every pattern around, and breaks down exactly how long/thick each scarf stripe should be.

Canceled: SGU Christmas Day Marathon
Instead: BSG Series DVD Set or Netflix Subscription With Instant Watch

Planning on spending Christmas Day snuggled up with some SGU only to find out it's canceled? Purchase the entire Battlestar Galactica series instead. It's been out long enough that you can get a pretty sweet deal on the internet or at a local store, or simply buy a Netflix instant watch membership. Not only is instant watch full of films, but is has all of the Lost seasons ready for instant viewing. It's something you can buy online and watch immediately on a computer or video game console.

Sold Out: Latest New Scifi Novel
Instead: Go Classic

You cannot go wrong with buying classic literature if the trendy new novels are sold out, or if you aren't sure which new books are good. Check out used book stores to see if they are carrying any of the classics. And here's a tip: If the dust jacket looks too beaten up, just take it off and gift the original cover with a bow. You can always give them the cover later.

In fact, it's almost better to go used and get a ton of paperbacks for the person who has always wanted to read Ursula K. Le Guin, so they can read her serial work one after the other. Still, if you want a crisp new gift try an older story compilation like, The Complete Stories of J. G. Ballard. Here's a list of our nerdy book recommendations.

For Whedonites, there's a simple choice of Single Issue Of The Week, and that's Angel: A Hole In The World #1, the first issue of a mini-series adapting the episode of the television series where Fred said goodbye and Illyria said hello. In a week weirdly quiet on the single issue front, it'd be a strong contender for everyone else as well.

Other single-issue choices would include DC's two Batman anthologies, Batman 80-Page Giant and Batman: Arkham Asylum Special, and IDW's Transformers: Bumblebee #1). But then there's also the first issue of Boom! Studios' Incorruptible, a companion to their Irredeemable series that asks what happens when a bad guy decides to go good (Clue: It's not as easy as you'd hope). Superhero thrills and spills will be yours.

Elsewhere, take out the credit card for some impressive trades and collections: Dark Horse Comics has a couple of coffee table art books (The Art of Emily The Strange and Drawing Down The Moon: The Art of Charles Vess). But there's also Star Wars: The Thrawn Trilogy, a hardcover collecting the comic versions of Timothy Zahn's three follow-ups to George Lucas' better cinematic threesome.

But while we're mentioning art books, IDW also has a great collection of mid-century sci-fi in the oversized The Art of Steve Ditko hardcover.

In similar media mode, Dynamite's Battlestar Galactica: Cylon War fills in some backstory of the Sci-Fi Channel incarnation of the show, and DC's Fringe collection does the same for those wondering what the deal was with William Bell and Walter Bishop in their younger days.

Those looking for violent superheroics can find their fill with Marvel's output for the week, which includes paperback versions of Secret Warriors Vol. 1 and the demonic X-Men book X-Infernus, as well as a hardcover collection of Thunderbolts: Widowmaker. Tis the season, after all.

Just like last week, next week and every other week of the year - well, except the week after next, because of the holidays - the complete list of everything hitting stores tomorrow is right here for your perusal, and you can find your local comic store here. Just remember: Start planning your skip week activities right now, before it's too late.

In this era of franchises based on pre-existing... well, franchises, really, it should be tough for brand new characters to make any significant impression, but I feel like we've been spoiled for choice in some ways; beyond the five mentioned below, I could've also gone for Y The Last Man's Yorick Brown, Scott Pilgrim's Kim Pine (Because, really, it's all about Kim. Admit it), Fringe's Walter Bishop or Dollhouse's Adelle DeWitt, to name just a few more. I'm not talking about the most important characters of the last ten years, or even the most popular, please understand; this is purely a (selfish and subjective) question of quality, for once. These, however, are my top 5:

Benjamin Linus
Color me one of those people who drifted in and out of Lost throughout the first two seasons of the show... Well, until Ben entered the picture. Michael Emerson's smarmy, knowing performance as "Henry Gale" brought something that the show had needed since the beginning: A Bad Guy. Or, at least, someone who we didn't know much about, but were pretty sure we shouldn't be trusting nonetheless. As we've learned more about the character since then, it's been Emerson's performance that's led the way, convincing us about a control freak who likes to think that he's one step ahead of everyone even though he's lost sight of the bigger picture. In a show filled with great characters - Locke was so close to making my top 5 - Ben stands apart as the best of them all.

Thaddeus S. "Rusty" Venture
Cynical, selfish and entirely delusional when it comes to his importance in the world, The Venture Bros.'s patriarchal figure may be one of the most oddly complex, nuanced character on television these days. On the surface, he's a self-centered coward emotionally scarred from a childhood as a Boy Adventurer who resents his life, his family and pretty much the rest of the world, but the longer the show goes on, the more we see a different Rusty: The father who's grooming Dean in his image - because there's no way that could go wrong - excited about sharing his passion for prog rock and science (and, surprisingly, offering support and advice in times of need), for one thing, or the man who's so pissed off by trouble ruining his plans that he ends up doing heroic deeds just to make his own life easier. Never mind that he's also genius enough to successfully clone his kids for years, replacing them if and when they died... Rusty Venture isn't the kind of man you could rely on, but he certainly makes for entertaining viewing.

Gaius Baltar
And talking of people you can't rely on, Battlestar Galactica's Baltar may have been chosen by God/The Gods/Some Higher Power/Ronald D. Moore to lead humanity towards its new home, along the way discovering a spiritual side, falling in love and growing as a human being, but that wasn't why we loved him so much. No, with Baltar, it was all about the weasel. Whether he was trying to maneuver himself into even greater positions of power, trying to stay alive after surrendering the colonies to the cylons on New Caprica or just trying to seduce whatever character had caught his attentions that week, Baltar was never better than when he was being weak and giving in to his worst impulses. James Callis' performance was one of the best things throughout the entire series, giving us a character that we Loved To Hate To Love, as well as some of the few moments of genuine comedy throughout the entire run. You just know that he'd have given up that whole farming thing within a month of the finale, don't you?

Donna Noble
She didn't fall in love with the Doctor. It's worth repeating: She didn't fall in love with the Doctor. After Rose and Martha, that fact alone made this particular Doctor Who companion feel like a breath of fresh air, but there was so much more to her than that: Her enthusiasm, and heart. Her ability to say the wrong thing in almost any occasion. Her self-confidence, misplacing in many ways, but making her feel like the Doctor's peer and friend instead of someone who believes everything he says and puts him on a pedestal (Catherine Tate deserves all credit for making that charming and irritating at once). Given her (intentionally) annoying first appearance in "The Runaway Bride," it's surprising that Donna turned into the companion I'll miss most from this new run, but it's definitely true; her exit was heartbreaking, entirely fitting and proof that Russell T. Davies loved her too much to kill her off. I'm selfishly hoping she survives "The End Of Time," too.

Kate Kane/Batwoman
Still relatively new, there's something fascinating about DC Comics' latest Batman spin-off. Under writer Greg Rucka's control - and, given her few appearances elsewhere, only under Rucka's control - Kate Kane is at once a reminder of, and refusal of, Bat-cliches. Yes, she was born of family tragedy, but her response wasn't to focus her entire life towards justice, but instead run off the rails in self-destructive behavior. Like Batman, she sees herself as a soldier, but she actually approaches her missions in that mindset, no doubt helped by her father and their shared military background. Most refreshingly, Batwoman is wonderfully fallible - Misunderstanding a prophecy to be about her own death in the recent "Elegy" storyline - and, at times, unlikable. Given her relatively few appearances since her debut in 2006's 52, it's surprising that she comes across as so rounded and real a character, but she does - and we hope her career is as long-lived as her male counterpart.

But enough about our love of Dr. Zachary Smith updates and redheaded women - What're your choices for the character who's made the greatest impression on you after appearing for the first time at some point during the last ten years? The comments are there for a purpose, after all...

The 1990s were really the heydey for wonderful but not-quite-convincing space skirmishes. We used to see tons of ships flying around our screen, often too many to count. Unlike Battlestar Galactica's quick cuts and weird handheld camera footage, these 1990s space wars were usually filmed with an unflinching eye or a slow pan, letting you see every computer-generated line and explosion.

And it's totally awesome.

You can compare these massive space shoot-outs to video games, but it's not entirely accurate — because the absolute best of these TV shoot-em-ups have more sensory overload, and you can't even imagine trying to interact with them. (I have seen a few video game cut scenes that approach this level of overload though.) You get ships flying in every possible direction, or a hundred individual starships on screen at once, and all you can do is sit there and drool. It doesn't look real, but your imagination fills in the gaps, which only makes it better.

That's really the key — these space battles are super elaborate and over the top, and that helps them draw on your imagination.

Remember when you used to imagine what a whole fleet of Federation and Klingon Starships flying into battle would look like? And then Star Trek: Deep Space Nine finally gave it to us, and it was completely unreal looking, yet amazing:

It wasn't really until the 1990s when you could have tons of ships flying in formation, like these SA-43 Hammerheads from Space: Above And Beyond:

Possibly my favorite 1990s CG space battles came from Babyon 5, however. They were even cheaper looking than Trek's battles, but even more ambitious. Look how much stuff they pack into every frame of these battles. And every penny they don't have for CG effects is more than made up for by the conviction of the actors:

For people who grew up on space battles as shown on the original Trek, Space: 1999, Blake's 7 or even the first few seasons of Star Trek: The Next Generation, these dogfights are revelatory. If space battles in the late 1970s and 1980s were all about trying to match the dog-fighting feel of Star Wars, then 1990s space battles were all about massive fleets going at it, sustaining massive casualties and fighting on. And yes, the massive casualties are a big part of why these battles rock so hard — you don't ever quite believe that each of those Federation starships has hundreds of crewmembers aboard, dying every time there's another flare on your screen, but it's still kind of horrifying and exciting to think so.

It really is all about suspension of disbelief — these battles ask more suspension of disbelief from you, but they give more back as well.

Here's some amazing battle footage, showing crowds of ships swarming, in this snippet from Andromeda as well. (Skip the first minute or so of this video):

And some awe-inspiring Farscape action:

And then there's Doctor Who's fake but oh-so-lovely Dalek fleet:

I suspect that we'll see a wave of nostalgia for these 1990s-style fleet-on-fleet battles, one of these days. Just like today, geeks feel nostalgic for guns that went "pew-pew-pew" and models roaring around fake starfields, in another decade everyone will be discovering the beauty of computer-generated space mayhem.

For now, though, the only place you can get this kind of star-fighting (in the United States, anyway) is on Syfy:

British site Den Of Geek ran a summary of everything we know about Caprica\, and this line caught my eye:

The story arc of the show will take us from the creation of the first Centurion cylons, and is due to end with the very first cylon war.

This was marked as fact, rather than fan speculation, but I can't find any basis for it. The only other place I can see any support for this claim is a speculative comment on Ain't It Cool News from last summer.

My question is, is this even possible? Battlestar Galactica: Razor showed us the last day of the first Cylon war, featuring a grown-up William Adama. Willie Adama is supposed to be nine years old in Caprica, and the first Cylon war supposedly lasted twelve and a half years. So I guess it's barely possible that if the series ends with Willie Adama as a tween or teen, you could see the start of the First Cylon War, if Adama joined the service as a 18-year-old.

In any case, I sort of hope this story is true, since it would actually make Caprica a bit more compelling if it had a defined end point. At the same time, going from the creation of the first Cylon to outright war with the Cylons within just a few years feels a bit speedy. What do you think?

Note: I'm not including the Star Wars prequels here, because the big letdown was The Phantom Menace in 1999. After that, the other two movies couldn't really be letdowns.

The Dark Knight Strikes Again. This was the moment we realized Frank Miller wasn't really Frank Miller any more. He agreed to do the long-awaited sequel to his most famous and groundbreaking graphic novels, the story that redefined Batman for a generation — and he turned in a bland caricature of his earlier brilliance. You can complain all you want about the assitude of All-Star Batman And Robin and The Spirit, but TDKSA was the start of the hackery. Worst moment: When the Joker turns out to be the much-abused Dick Grayson, and Bats kills him without a second thought.

Fox's Reign Of Terror. Firefly should have been one of the great success stories of the 2000s. It's hard to remember now how invincible Joss Whedon seemed going into Firefly — with two hit shows under his belt, he was the writer of several huge movies. And now he was bringing his patented mixture of rollicking adventure and twisted artiness to a space opera. Sure, Firefly's "Cowboys in Space" thing may have confused people at first, but the show really does sell itself, after just a few minutes' viewing, thanks to vivid characters. The failure of the TV show didn't just damage Joss Whedon's career — it damaged media SF as a whole, helping to push us towards canned remakes and reboots. And Firefly's demise was just the first of a trail of broken dreams and disappointments, culminating in the cancellation of Terminator: The Sarah Connor Chronicles and the burial of the promising Virtuality.

NASA and the space program. The decade did hold some great achievements for NASA, including the Mars rovers and some probes traveling outwards into the solar system. But it's hard not to feel a bit crushed by the fact that NASA is retiring its fleet of space shuttles without having a replacement lined up. We're going to have to hitch a ride with the Russians from here on out, and it feels a bit, well, disappointing. Especially with science-fiction promising us that this is our time to explore the solar system and beyond it, the stars themselves.

Ang Lee's Hulk. Before this movie came out, I would have sworn that Ang Lee never made a bad film. His track record included arthouse sensations like The Wedding Banquet, The Ice Storm and Sense And Sensibility, but also the brilliant actioner Crouching Tiger Hidden Dragon. He was also perhaps the most artsy director to take on a superhero icon to date (no offense, Tim Burton). There was every reason to believe Hulk would be both epic and heartfelt — but instead, we got gamma-irradiated poodles, daddy issues and a Hulk who sulked. We probably won't ever get a really great Hulk movie now, after two failures, which sucks. The Hulk deserves a proper outing, in which he fights monsters and marauders and crushes buildings. The Hulk needs to discover that he's not the worst monster in his world, and have larger-than-life adventures. Ang Lee just wasn't capable of giving that to us.

The Matrix sequels. This seems like a no-brainer in retrospect, but maybe you need cyber-Colonel Sanders to take you back and explain to you how much we were all looking forward to The Matrix 2 & 3. Ten years ago, The Matrix was the freshest thing to come out in ages, despite playing on ideas that books had explored for years. Its blend of fetish and noir and cyberpunk and Hong Kong action felt viciously original. And there were just so many ideas for the sequels to explore, so many mysteries about the machine world to uncover. And then... we just sort of descended into muddle. And long rave scenes. And blind Jesus. Walking out of The Matrix Reloaded, I remember someone turning to me and saying, "Well, that wasn't even the best powerpoint presentation I've sat through lately."

Identity Crisis and Infinite Crisis. DC Comics' biggest "event" storylines of the mid-2000s seemed to be groping towards a more adult, more flawed view of their major superheroes, with some of comics' most talent writers on board. But they overshot, landing in angstville and bombarding us with retcons that rewrote the "Satellite era" of the Justice League. As if in an attempt to capture the cachet of Alan Moore's Batman: The Killing Joke two decades earlier, these stories gave us female heroes being raped or abused, and turning into murderers. And Batman saying to Superman, "The last time you inspired anyone was when you died." The melodrama was thicker than the walls of Superman's Fortress of Solitude, and yet when it was all over, it was hard to understand what any of it had been about. The superheroes were closer to a bickering family (calling each other by their first names all the time) and the threats they faced seemed more existential and less external.

Superman Returns. There were a slew of other disappointing superhero movies in the past decade — but mostly you knew going into them that they were going to be ass. Who really thought Brett Ratner would make a good X-Men movie? Even Spider-Man 3 showed every sign of being ass-flavored long before it came out, despite Sam Raimi's involvement. But this film was Bryan Singer coming off two great X-Men films and The Usual Suspects, and he was doing the gutsy move of making it a sequel to the two Donner movies instead of going for the standard-issue reboot. Singer doing Donner — how could it be bad? Uh. Well, there's the part where he changed Clark Kent into Stalkerman. And then there's the Son Of Superman thing. But also, maybe, there's just the fact that the Donner movies were of a different era, and you can't bring that back.

Heroes seasons 2-4. Just imagine, for a moment, if this show had lived up to the promise of its first season. I know it's almost impossible to picture it, but just try. This mutant soap opera thrived on showing us the complications and craziness that come from secret super powers, against the backdrop of a sinister mutant-hunting conspiracy and a super-powered serial killer. But the show wrote checks it couldn't cash, including showing us Claire growing into her heroic destiny and Hiro becoming a future shaved-headed badass. Most of all, the show ducked out on its very title, opting to show us histrionics and family squabbles in place of actual heroism.

Watchmen. It was perhaps the greatest graphic novel of all time — almost certainly the greatest superhero comic of all time — lovingly recreated on screen by the ultimate OCD nerd. Every panel of the comic, recreated as concept art, then as storyboards, then as living, breathing people in costumes, surrounded by CG. Finally, a movie made by us for us. Except. The result, though lovely as anything, looked sort of lifeless once you took it out of the Smashing Pumpkins music-video trailers. The characters didn't quite live and breathe — especially Silk Spectre II, who needed to be the heart of the story. And the ending wasn't just missing a giant squid, or some other huge monstrosity to replace it — it was also lacking a certain coherence and urgency. Once people start talking about power signatures, it suddenly turns into an episode of Star Trek: Voyager. Maybe Watchmen could never have lived up to the book, but it could have been more thrilling than this, with a different Silk Spectre and a more thunderous ending.

Battlestar Galactica's big finale. I know that opinions will differ on this one — but just consider. BSG's finale was one of the most hyped things of recent years. We read endless interviews in which Edward James Olmos, Ron Moore and various others told us that the final episode would shake us to our very cores, and make us weep and smear paint and throw up on ourselves. Meanwhile, Syfy ran promos over and over again that said that "All Will Be Revealed," and I don't remember an asterisk leading to a disclaimer explaining that "All" in this context actually meant a limited number of things, not including how Starbuck came back from the dead or what the hell was up with the Opera House. Even if you think this was the most brilliant conclusion in history, you have to admit BSG promised too much.

It's a strange mix of new releases this week, as the industry seems to be slowing down for the holidays and yet still managing to release a few must-reads (including a strong contender for book of the year), but we'll get to them later.

Instead, let's start with the TV and movie tie-ins of the week: Battlestar Galactica: The Final Five collects the mini-series that told a possible backstory for everyone's favorite Cylons, and it's better than you might expect. Meanwhile, Star Trek Alien Spotlight: Cardassians fulfills a similar role for Deep Space Nine's ridge-headed badguys. It's clearly backstory week, because Marvel's Ender's Game: War of Gifts special issue also fills in some blanks. Thankfully, DC's Dante's Inferno video game tie-in is much more straight-forward in just adapting the game... that adapts the classic story. Boxes within boxes!

Over in the superhero school of thought, DC have their annual Holiday Special to warm the cockles of your heart, after which you'll be ready for the triple-X-Men-threat of Genext United (The future children of the X-Men unite!), X-Men/Spider-Man (The X-Men and Spider-Man team up during different parts of their history!) and Nation X (The X-Men have their own island! And... stuff... happens on it?). If all of that sounds too much, we'll direct you to the much-anticipated-by-us Spider-Man And Secret Wars, a new series that retells the classic story with far fewer dated references.

Elsewhere, Image have a new Tank Girl special, Tank Girl: Nuggets to offer up festivities for kangaroo lovers. There's also Pilot Season: Murderer, a one-shot that you — yes, you — could help make into an ongoing series about a man who is compelled to kill in order to keep living.

But as topical as that may sound, it doesn't come anywhere close to being book of the week. No, that honor belongs entirely to the first issue of Daytripper, a new series by Brazilian brothers Gabriel Ba and Fabio Moon that is as beautifully written as it is illustrated (Visually, it's easily one of the best things you'll have seen this year); admittedly, it's not the most io9-friendly story — it's very grounded in real life, at least in the first issue — but, having seen the first two issues in preview, it's definitely something we'd recommend as one of the best things we've read in a long time.

As ever, the complete Diamond Distributors shipping list will tell you everything that's hitting stores tomorrow, and the Comic Shop Locator will tell you where to find said stores. We just hope that, by the time you get there, you'll be more in the mood for magical realism than killing people.

Included in the gallery is the first picture of Luciana Carro as Pryah, who works for Daniel Graystone. But you may remember her by her BSG nickname, Kat.

[Syfy via Battlestar Blog]

Mad Max: Fury Road:

Just how big is the set for this film? Says star Tom Hardy:

It's massive. It's enormous," he continued. "It's like turning a mountain upside down and pouring it through a sieve.

Any clue what that means? It sounds epic, anyway. [MTV]

Avatar:

Not sure if we've already run this clip or not, but if not, then enjoy:

And here's a clip we definitely haven't shown you before. I love Neytiri wearing her sunglasses to ride her dragon. [Cineplex via Slashfilm]

The Lovely Bones:

Weird nitpicks: After Stanley Tucci's creepy pedophile murderer tosses his victim Susie Salmon's charm bracelet in the water, but keeps the "house" charm. But then we see all the charms expand into ice sculptures or clouds or topiaries — but the house charm is still among them. Also, before Susie dies we see her reading Seventeen magazine, but after she dies, she fantasizes she's the cover girl in Groovy Teen magazine. Towards the end of the movie, Susie sort of inhabits the body of a goth girl who looks like Emly the Strange, and makes out with Emily's boyfriend, whom Susie loved before she died. Then Susie goes to heaven permanently, and we see Emily and her boyfriend spooning, with no mention of the weird ghost possession make-out that just happened. [Black Book Mag]

Kick Ass:

A new character poster gives us a better look at the Red Mist. Bigger version at the first link. [AICN via Cinemablend]

Endangered Species:

A few new details about Eli Roth's Transformers-meets-Cloverfield movie. It's set against an urban backdrop. He's tweaking the script at Quentin Tarantino's suggestion. He's going to do some visual-effects tests, the results of which will determine how he shoots the thing. It's very character-driven, and he has some actors he's dying to work with. [MTV]

Eclipse:

A new picture of your favorite couple, Edward and Bella. [SpoilerTV-Movies]

Doctor Who:

As you may have heard, the show was filming in Croatia this past week, with the Doctor, Amy and new companion Rory in tow. (And some are claiming that Rory is Amy's boyfriend — is he the new Mickey Smith?) The Croatia filming appears to be for an episode taking place in the past, judging from some of the costumes. But don't believe the British media chatter that it's an episode about vampires — it's almost certainly the Van Gogh episode that Richard Curtis wrote. More pics at the links. [Sky and Hello!]

Here are a bunch of promo pics from "The End Of Time," David Tennant's swansong, one or two of which we may have shown you before. They include your first look at the alien, shapeshifting Vinovicci. [BlogtorWho and BSCReview]

Meanwhile, Britain's Radio Times has another cast list for "End Of Time" part 2, which conflicts with the IMDB version. Notably, no Harriet Jones. Hmmm...

David Tennant - The Doctor
John Simm - The Master
Bernard Gribbins - Wilfred Mott
Timothy Dalton - The Narrator
Catherine Tate - Donna Noble
Jacqueline King - Sylvia Noble
June Whitfield - Minnie Hooper
Claire Bloom - The Woman
David Harewood - Joshua Naismith
TRacy Ifeachor - Abigail Naismith
Lawry Lewin - Rossiter
Sinead Keenan - Addams
Alexandra Moen - Lucy Saxon
Karlo Collins - Shaun Temple
Teresa Banham - Governor
Barry Howard - Oliver Barnes
Allister Bain - Winston Katusi
Sylvia Seymour - Miss Trefusis
Pete Lee-Wilson - Tommo
Dwayne Scantlebury - Ginger
Joe Dixon - The Second
Julie Legrand - The Partisan
Brid Brennan - The Visionary
Krystal Archer - Neys
Lachele Carl - Trinity Wells
Paul Kasey - Ood Sigma
Ruari Mears - Elder Ood
Silas Carson - voice of Ood Sigma
Brian Cox - voice of Elder Ood
Nicholas Briggs - voice of Judoon

[BlogtorWho]

Caprica:

This Battlestar Galactica prequel just cast another actor to play William Adama — no, not the future Admiral, but his grandfather. Aleks Paunovic will play the father of Joseph Adama and grandfather to little Willie in some flashback scenes, and he'll be a recurring character. Paunovic already appeared on BSG, playing Sgt. Fischer. [Aleks Paunovic via Battlestar Blog]

Lost:

A deserted area of Hawaiian rainforest hides a new camp which has been set up for this show's sixth season. It doesn't look like much, though. More pics at the link. [SpoilersLost]

Another new set — a ship of some sort, or rather part of one. It's apparently designed so they can rock the deck back and forth and make it look like the ship is caught up in a huge storm. And considering that some prisoner types were hanging around in baggy brown clothes, it may be the Black Rock. More pics at the link. [SpoilersLost]

Jose Yenque tweeted that he's joining the cast of this show. [Twitter via SpoilersLost]

Also, Fionnula Flanagan told an Irish talk show she'll be back for two episodes as Eloise Hawking, not surprisingly. [SpoilersLost]

Fringe:

The cast reveals the names of the Observers, and discusses their significance. [Fringe Television]

Meanwhile, I'm hard-pressed to tell exactly what's going on in this new set video. I think Anna Torv is being blown across a parking lot by some mysterious force, but hard to say. There are seven more videos from the same person under this YouTube account. I do like one commenter who says the intrepid fan making these recordings should shave his/her head and wear a fedora. [Anon120409 on Youtube]

And here's a sneak peek and "scenemaker" for Thursday's new Walter-and-William episode. [FringeRus]

Supernatural:

The show is casting one of the Four Horsemen for the episode "My Bloody Valentine:

[FAMINE] 50 to 80 years old... He is one of the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse. He is withered, weak, raspy. This character is a creepy and destructive old man filled with a voracious hunger...GUEST STAR

[CUPID] 30s to 40s, doughy, out of shape, naked, his humorously loving character greets everyone with enormous bear hugs that almost break their ribs. He is overflowing with love and positivity to an almost humorous and narcotic degree (think Will Farrell in "ELF" sptv050769)...GUEST STAR

[SpoilerTV]

Also, Julie McNiven says that when Anna goes back in time and tries to kill baby Sam in episode 13, it's for the best reasons:

Everything Anna does is motivated by wanting to do the right thing, wanting to do what she feels is going to keep this apocalypse from happening. I see Anna as always doing what she thinks is right and she's very strong about that and doesn't want to hear anything otherwise.

And she says there's some great hand-to-hand combat and throwdowns in the episode, and hints that Anna does actually survive to try and kill more babies in the future. [AOL]

The Survivors:

There will be a "high octane" second series of this British remake at some point, but no date yet. And here's what happens:

The series picks up moments after the thrilling cliff-hanger to the first series and the survivors are now struggling not just with the difficulties of day-to-day life amidst the ruins of the post-virus apocalypse but also with the threat of other emerging communities and the machinations of the sinister Lab.

As the series begins, Abby is being held by Whittaker and Fiona at the Lab. There, she learns that the scientists have avoided infection and are looking desperately for a vaccine which they believe her unique immune system alone will generate.

Meanwhile, the family races to save Greg's life as he lies dying from a gunshot wound. Drawn into a burning hospital by their search for the necessary medical equipment, Al and Anya are caught in an avalanche of rubble as the building collapses around them. Tom is faced with the stark challenge of rescuing his friends from a seemingly insurmountable disaster, with only Sarah and Naj to help him.

Characters returning for this high-octane second series are Abby, a devoted mother with a missing son; Greg, a loner, hiding the pain of his past; Anya, a doctor who has seen too much; Al, a playboy who becomes a surrogate father to the young and headstrong Najid; Sarah, a hedonist used to getting her own way; Tom Price, handsome, dangerous and a high-security prisoner before the virus hit; and Samantha Willis, the last surviving member of the British Government.

[Survivors BBC TV]

V:

So just who are the Visitors? Laura Vandervoort explains that they're basically Canadians. Also, she says her character is definitely somewhat evil, but she's not sure how much yet. [Multipleverses]

FlashForward:

Apparently the reason why the show took a week off was simple: Major, huge developments happen in the episodes that were going to be episodes 15 and 16, and the network looked at those scripts and decided they should be episodes 13 and 14 instead (so, less treading water.) And it's not clear whether the original episodes 13 and 14 were scrapped, or just retooled to appear later in the season. Also, the biggest reveals of the season happen in the next two episodes, 11 and 12, says David S. Goyer. [EW]

Chuck:

Episode 3x11 will be "Chuck Vs. The Final Exam." [ChuckTV]

And one more new promo reveals that we'll be seeing a "Whole New Chuck." He's a reluctant spy no longer.

Sanctuary:

In next week's episode, "Penance," Michael Shanks guest stars as an abnormal named Jimmy who has a special David Cronenberg-esque pouch in his stomach, which he can use to smuggle things for the Sanctuary — including, in this case, a dangerous abnormal. Some bad guys get involved, and he's forced to go on the run with Kate, leading to a big secret for the two of them being revealed. And then in the following week's "Sleepers," Will and Magnus are in Mexico looking into some missing teenagers, and they run into vampire Nikoka Tesla, who's up to no good. [Sci Fi Wire]

Additiional reporting by Mary Ratliff.

Okay, that's obviously not completely fair; after all, this last ten years have also seen things like Lost and Twilight winning over new fans, not to mention the end of the Harry Potter book series. But there's no denying that this has been a decade of recycling ideas: James Bond, Batman and Star Trek all got movie reboots (Trek also got a television one, if you count Enterprise), Star Wars gained new life as a TV show, Doctor Who and Battlestar Galactica was reborn to much acclaim, unlike fellow television reboots Bionic Woman, Knight Rider and V. We even have Tron waiting in the wings for next year, along with a new Charlie's Angels TV show. The most successful "new" media franchises were Transformers and Spider-Man - based on ideas that are over two decades old (You could even argue that things like Lost and Twilight are simply mashing up old ideas into relatively new forms; they're definitely standing on the shoulders of giants, at least). So what happened?

It's easy to just say "Well, the geeks are in charge of media now," even if it's not necessarily untrue. But that doesn't explain how they got there, and why they're not making us fall in love with all manner of new things, instead of retreads of old flames (Does Fringe count as new, or just an updated X-Files?). Personally, I think the blame is shared pretty much equally between creators and the audience. For all that we may cry YARM whenever someone talks about their dream to make the ultimate Logan's Run project, it's as much a desire to succeed as creative backwards-looking that's behind it; audiences, for the most part, tend not to support the new in numbers necessary to make it a big success. Look at the most successful movies of the last ten years: Each one is based on a concept that people grew up on.

So, is it simply nostalgia? Perhaps; it's tempting to play armchair psychologist and stroke the chin, commenting on a return to childhood things following the trauma of 9/11, but it doesn't quite fit, because how does that explain the domination of 2000's The Grinch or 1999's Phantom Menace? You can see definite post-9/11 tropes throughout the pop culture that followed (A simpler morality, where good guys always won and could save us from death from above, in many cases; stories of people dealing with increasingly familiar apocalypses in others), but I don't think that the prevalence of reboots was necessarily one of them. It's not laziness, either; some reboots (Battlestar Galactica, for example) put in as much work as any original concept in terms of worldbuilding and creation.

In the end, it may simply be the result of conservatism on everyone's parts: Audiences don't want to spend time or money on something they don't know will entertain them, and studios/creators don't want to spend time or money on something that they don't know will have an audience waiting for it. Movies like District 9 or Moon, web content like Dr. Horrible and the increasing use of comic books as source material for other media back this up, to an extent; the new ideas, and new voices, now have to find new - and cheaper - outlets through which to make themselves known, and become popular and proven enough for the big time. Maybe that'll have happened by the time they've been around long enough to be nostalgic about.

So here are the most insane SF soaps we could think of — but I bet we missed some good ones. What are your favorites? Pipe up in comments with the lurid details!

Top image by Dennys Ilic. Additional reporting by Josh C. Snyder.

Heroes

You can pick any character from this show and get a headache trying to figure out all the story twists he or she has gone through. Take Matt Parkman: He's trying to keep his marriage together — No, wait! Now he's living with Mohinder and co-parenting Molly the mutant-detecting girl! — No, wait! Molly is out of the picture! And now Matt is becoming an African-esque shaman! — No, wait! Now Matt is in love with Daphne the speedster, who's the Love Of His Life! — No, wait! Now Matt is back with his wife, and will never think about Daphne again! — No, wait! Etc. etc. etc. My favorite, though, is probably Peter's girlfriend trapped in an alternate dystopian future — whom we will never mention again! Ha ha ha ha urk. (Matt Loves Daphne wallpaper from Fanpop.)

Alias

This show started off pretty coherent — but around the third brainwashing or the tenth revelation that Sidney's mother's cousin was really the spy behind brainwashing Sidney to think her half-sister was a chicken. I defy anybody to explain to me the tangled backstory of the Bristow family.

The Cat Who Walked Through Walls by Robert A. Heinlein:

I made a dreadful mistake: This was the first Heinlein book I ever read — and it may have ruined me for Heinlein forever. In the late Heinlein novels, every character ever shows up, and they mostly have sex together, interspersed with a lot of drama and philosophizing. It's a sequel to The Moon Is A Harsh Mistress as well as Number Of The Beast, and features characters from several other books — including Jubal Harshaw, Lazarus Long and Hazel Stone, and it turns out that all of Heinlein's characters have previously unsuspected connections to each other. As reviewer James W. Harris puts it:

Having all of his "good" guys sound like a convention of smarmy talking wife-swappers is just gross. I hate to sound like a teenage girl, but damn, Heinlein's kissy-kissy talk and innuendo just made me want to puke. And making his classic characters act out in this limp-dick porn flick is just tragic. Having them go on and on about how they were going to kill people for bad manners is just a little psycho to me. Evidently a lot of people and situations annoyed the hell out of Heinlein and he used this book to vent. Some people want to call this satire but I think that's whitewash.

Maybe Heinlein lost his mojo and these multiverse stories were the best he could do. Personally, I thought The Rolling Stones was a perfect novel, and bringing back Hazel Stone was a fictionally fuck-up of an idea, ditto for the cast of The Moon is a Harsh Mistress. Maybe I am a prude because I just don't want the Hazel Stone, grandmother of Castor and Pollux, joking about being stretched out of shape by giant 25 centimeter cock.

All of Heinlein's personally favorite characters get put into a fictional juicer and blended into weird rabble of sex obsessed mob that chirp a weird innuendo patter and are almost impossible to tell apart. When I read these multiverse stories I can't help but believe that horniness was driving Heinlein crazy. These later stories are preoccupied with sex, killing people, responding to annoying people, the reliability of witnesses, rude people deserving capital punishment, and so on.

Venture Bros.:

At least this show is ridiculous on purpose — the ultra-demented story of the Venture clan has gotten more and more involved, with Sergeant Hatred's struggle against his pedophilic past taking center stage, and deformed clones and weird villain love affairs aplenty. Most of all, there are the labyrinthine family elements crossing over into everything, like the revelation that Dean was also the head of the Guild. The same characters and their families end up being connected in ever more improbable and weird ways, making our heads spin.

Battlestar Galactica:

I have four (or possibly five) words for you: "Hotdog is the father." Whaaa? There's also the great way Baltar went from being a slimy scientist to being a slimy politician to being a slimy cult leader — and what happened to the baby that Baltar and Six were going to have together? Oh and while we're on the subject, what about Saul Tigh being crazy-chicken in love with Caprica Six — until she has a miscarriage, and then he never thinks about her again? It all makes you want to grip your television and scream (in a Krazy Starbuck voice) "You're going the wrong way!"

Sonic The Hedgehog (comics):

According to the always great TVTropes website, this comic-book tie-in to the popular video game went whirling off on crazier tangents than a flying hedgehog on crack. To quote TVTropes:

The Archie Comics Sonic The Hedgehog series twisted Sonic's love life into a Gordian Knot: Originally hooked up with Sally Acorn, she got stuck ruling the country and shoved the relationship to the side to focus on her new duties, prompting Sonic to fall in with Mina Mongoose, starting a rivalry between the two women for Sonic's affection. He then started seeing Fiona Fox on the side, which not only pissed off Mina and Sally, but Tails, as well, who had a crush on her due to falling in love with a robotic duplicate created by Robotnik several years earlier (don't ask). Eventually, Mina got her own boyfriend, Sally got Sonic once again, and Tails got tossed into a brick wall by Fiona, who gave them all the finger to have a relationship with Sonic's evil clone from another universe. And that's not even counting the mini-tangle between Antoine, Sally, Bunnie Rabbot, and Antoine's evil clone from the same universe Fiona's new beau comes from.

Got it? Great.

Gundam Wing:

Okay, let's get this straight... Relena Darlian discovers she's really adopted, and her real name is Relena Peacecraft, one of the last survivors of the pacifistic (duh) Peacecraft tribe. And then it turns out that Zechs Marquise is her long lost older brother. Meanwhile, she gets obsessed with Heero, a young whackjob who keeps announcing he's going to kill her, not unlike the "I'm going to rape you" guy in Welcome To The Dollhouse. And that's just scratching the surface of the most confusing, tangly saga of all time, involving endless backstory and weird family crap.

Angel:

I was going to do Charmed, Angel's fellow WB series which had the whole "my ex-husband is a half-demon" thing, but Angel is so much more ridiculous — mostly because of Cordy, who is in love with Groosalugg, until she's in love with Angel instead, but meanwhile she's turned into a half-demon and then she becomes a Higher Power, until she comes back and has sex with Angel's son — who, as someone points out, is practically her stepson since she helped care for him as a baby — and then becomes pregnant and evil — until she gives birth to an evil god. Nothing on parent show Buffy was as incestuous and ridiculous as Cordy's arc on Angel. Oh, actually, wait — Cordelia was pregnant twice on Angel.

Robotech:

Sure, it was supposedly about the giant mechas, but it was really all about the tragic loves and the tormented Rick-Minmei-Lisa love triangle. To quote Wikipedia,

In early 2013, while sitting at an outdoor cafe, [Lisa] contemplates the love triangle between the three of them when she overhears two men talking about how women were "dealt all the aces" when it comes to relationships, to which Lisa says to herself "that's all you know...here's one woman who would trade every ace in the deck for one Rick Hunter.

Sigh. Twoo Love. Here's a great fanvid featuring the music of White Town. Yay!

X-Men (comics):

This, of course, is the most insane soap opera imaginable. At this point, the X-men have had illegitmate babies from the future, secret love affairs, doomed passions and multiple bad transcriptions of all sorts of accents, from Cajun to Scottish. My favorite ridiculous soap-opera twist might be Madrox's night of passion with two female members of X-Factor: Siryn and Monet, resulting in a pregnancy that isn't quite a normal pregnancy. But then there's also the whole insane Rogue/Gambit thing, the Scott/Jean/Wolverine/Emma love doodaddle, and of course Professor X turning out to be secretly in love with Jean Grey. That's just scratching the surface, really. If you want more info, check out the X-Men relationship map — which is probably already out of date!

We're lucky enough to feature Quantum Mechanix's authentic replica of the Cylon targets used on Battlestar Galactica before any other site — even Quantum Mechanix's own site. They're model-makers who brought you the amazing animated-style BSG figures, the Cylon raider filming minature, the U.S.S. Enterprise model, the detailed map of Firefly's 'Verse, and most of all the perfect replica of the Serenity.

Here's the full description for the Cylon poster, so you can prepare to take aim with your credit card:

Take Out Your Aggression on a Target That Deserves It!

Battlestar Galactica is one of the most ground-breaking television shows of all time. Not just in terms of storytelling and visual effects, but in every detail – set design, soundtrack – even the background props.

In our continuing quest to bring you affordable, screen-accurate replicas of the iconic props from TV's greatest saga, we are proud to present our screen-accurate replica of the Cylon Centurion practice target as seen on Galactica's shooting range.

Reproduced from the same digital files used to print the screen-used props, QMx has painstakingly reproduced this practice target on an 18"x24" poster printed on 60-pound flat-finish paper stock. We've even die cut the poster into the same distinctive trapizoid shape (why do Colonials hate right angles so much?) and we've included the scoring form in lower right corner of the poster.

All for just $9.95 per poster. Perfect way to prepare for the fight against our Cylon oppressors, when that day inevitably comes.

It'll be available soon over at Quantum Mechanix.