Coleman explains that most bones in forests are, of course, picked clean by predators. So that explains why we don't find dead Bigfoots (Bigfeet?) everywhere, as well as the carcasses of creatures like tigers and moose. Still, that begs the question: Where are the bones? Apparently, porcupines eat bones, as well as hoarding them:

One important behavior of some species of porcupines is that they hoard bones of other animals in or around their dens. Porcupines sometimes are found with bones in their living spaces. For example, the North African crested porcupine (Hystrix cristata) and the Cape porcupine (Hystrix africaeaustralis) of sub-Saharan Africa, especially in areas deficient in phosphorous, will practice osteophagia, or gnawing on bones. These porcupines will often accumulate large piles of bones in their dens . . . In North America, studies of situations in which bones accumulate today and in the past often include porcupine caves. For an intriguing article on what Pleistocene mammal remains were found in one such gathering of bones, see "Bears and Man at Porcupine Cave, Western Uinta Mountains, Utah" by Timothy H. Heaton, Museum of Comparative Zoology, Harvard University, in Current Research in the Pleistocene, vol. 5, pp. 71-73 (1988).

The odds are more highly in favor of Bigfoot bones and bodies never being found . . . But if they are ever found, Bigfoot teeth or old bones possibly might be discovered near or in porcupine habitation sites . . . We won't know unless we look, and reexamine past and future "unidentified" finds from porcupine caves, digs, and dens.

via Cryptomundo

Bigfoot photo by Douglas E. Egolf.

It wouldn't be horror week without campy/terrible horror movies to get excited over — and nothing looks more crap-camp- tastic than Nightbeasts, the story about a man, and a pack of Bigfeet — because they travel in packs, bitches! Check out the trailer.

[via CHUD]

The Mahoneys of Jefferson County, Kentucky believe they have caught a picture of Bigfoot on their motion-sensitive camera, which they set up to find out where all their vegetables were disappearing to. This is what they caught:

But don't take our word for it, here they are, explaining the whole discovery.

Meanwhile, in the Sumatra Jungle a couple believe they stumbled on the elusive Orang Pendek. Which is more of a smaller Bigfoot, or "Jungle Ape Man" as the stories describe. They didn't get a picture of the creature, but managed to take a shot of its footprint, and grabbed a sample of rattan palm it was chewing on for DNA evidence.

Witnesses have described the beast as being about 5ft tall and say that it walks on two legs.

It is thought to be extremely powerful - with reports of onlookers seeing it ripping apart logs.

Both stories were found at The Sun, so it's gotta be true. But you be the judge — until the DNA evidence comes back.

A group of tourists in Poland have VIDEO-TAPE EVIDENCE of the Big-Footed beast. And Fox host Shep Smith is pained to bring you that latest supernatural news. Sure it's terribly shaky and probably a completely fake video, but what's with all the 'tude, Shep? Granted, it's terrible, but we remember a more Big-Foot-friendly era, when kids with a ice box full of fake fur demanded more respect from TV hosts. Shep you made us like your temper for dropping the F-bomb on Fox, don't throw it all away!

Here's the full youtube video:

But as for the second part of the video with Japan's Prime Minister's wife and her alien issues, Shep may be right — she's nuts.

You can't resist a movie described by OG zinester Jim Goad like this:

Ape Canyon is guaranteed to be the funniest Bigfoot-rape comedy you'll see this year. The fact that it is likely the only Bigfoot-rape comedy ever made shouldn't dampen your enthusiasm.

Really, the Bigfoot in this movie doesn't look all that different from the Bigfoot that those hunters showed off today in the "Bigfoot press conference." What I love about Ape Canyon is that its premise is just so plausible: Doesn't it just make sense that Bigfoot is so good in the sack that women come to the forest in heat, screaming his name? [Ape Canyon via NormalPeopleLikeYou]

The men who discovered Bigfoot's remains, Matthew Whitton and Rick Dyer (from BigFootTracker.com) gathered in Palo Alto, California, baseball hats and all, for the big reveal. With them was Tom Biscardi, host of an Bigfoot Internet radio show.

According to Fox News the men showed reporters two blurry photos that were the mouth of the beast and the other was a picture of the beast running around in the Georgia woods. The Scooby Gang wouldn't reveal more, to protect this endangered species.

Why blurry photos, because according to the BFRO, it's really just a Halloween costume of Sasquatch and not the real deal itself. Looking at pictures of the costume, from Haunted Adventures, next to the image of the cooler is pretty convincing.

The "DNA" evidence that was revealed is a bit confusing. According to the BFRO they didn't actually take a specimen from the Bigfoot in question:

The only scientist involved with them (Curt Nelson) simply received a "DNA sample" in the mail. Three results so far from that sample: 1) unknown, 2) human, and 3) possum. Nelso will do more tests, but he has said his tests don't mean anything.

Biscardi said there would be no other Bigfoot news today, but promised that Fox News could bring a crew of scientist down to Georgia to examine the body. If by scientists, he means gather more drunk friends to parade around in the suit and take pictures, then I think he's right on the money.

But best of all is the fact that radio show host Biscardi explained that both Whitton and Dyerbeen have received death threats throughout this whole discovery. I can only assume this is by Bigfoot's wife who is pissed that they murdered her husband and have been milking his corpse for money. Vengeance is yours, Mrs. Foot.

We've been trying to bring you footage from the press conference that both CNN and Fox News were at, but my senses are telling me that now that everyone deems this an actual hoax the videos are being stripped down. Instead here is some You Tubery of The Big Foot Police talking about their discovery, it's a classic.

UPDATE: Here is the link to the video footage, it's 45 minutes long! It's at NBC King 5.

[Haunted Adventures, BFRO and Fox News]

According to the press release the creature that was discovered is 7 feet and 7 inches tall, and weighs 500 pounds. His feet are flat and it was found in the Northern woods of Georgia. (Actual location isn't being revealed).

First and foremost what about Bigfoot's rights? Is he man or beast? If he's a man doesn't he get burial rights?

Where do you bury Bigfoot? I've heard he's Canadian. If he is, in fact, of Canadian origin, that's a ton of paperwork his loved ones will have to go to to transfer the body through the border while deciding if it's animal remains or human remains. I know I've been on the phone trying to get to the bottom of this question with the Canadian embassy for some time. Also, if he's Canadian, how did he get so far from home?

What if he has no one to claim his remains, will he become a burden of the state? Will the United States government try and find his lineage? It saddens me thinking of Bigfoot in one of those standard government style burials. This is fucking Bigfoot people, show a little respect.

Here are the gentleman that discovered the gentle beast. From the left, Mathew Whitton, Tom Biscardi, and Rick Dyer gather round a cooler full of Bigfoot.

I'll be covering the all-important Bigfoot press conference tomorrow at 12 PM Pacific Coast Time. At the conference they will be revealing pictures and DNA evidence. Hopefully they will reveal the DNA evidence like Maury's "who's your daddy" episodes.

So stay tuned and hopefully they will be able to answer all of my questions tomorrow, as opposed to the "you'll have to wait" comment I got earlier.
[Searching For Bigfoot]

The shadowy creature was spotted in Northwestern Ontario around 10 a.m. by Helen Pahpasay and her mother. The women even claim that others later found a large, six-toed footprint in the area (six toes!). Apparently this is the second sighting of a big foot-esque creature the general region, and there were sightings in 2006 in the woods of Northern Manitoba and Saskatchewan. It's all adding up, people. We're mere moments away from a reality TV version of Harry and the Hendersons, set in Prince Albert, Sask.

[CBC News]