The Five Stages of Grief, as explained by the Conan the Barbarian…

So this weekend's freshly oiled Conan The Barbarian film failed to pillage moviegoers' wallets and Jason Momoa's gently undulating pectorals didn't hypnotize critics. This shouldn't have entirely come as a surprise, seeing as how the Conan moving-picture franchise has been in dire straits for decades now. » 8/22/11 8:25am 8/22/11 8:25am