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San Francisco, 10:01 PM
Mon Nov 9
25 posts in the last 24 hours
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09/17/09
Also, Meredith, I think the message should be "Sex without birth control is BAD."
09/17/09
09/17/09
But what is happening in that picture?
09/17/09
"This is how babies are made, right? I think so. I know the womb is involved somehow."
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And only vampire fangs and werewolf claws can cut through vampire skin or whatever, so the magical Cullens BITE THE BABY OUT which basically would have killed Mary Sue, except Sparkly Stalker injects her with shitloads of his ~venom~ so SHE becomes a vampire, and it is a horrifying, unbelievably traumatizing scene to read and all-around gross.
Yes, I read the fourth book. I can honestly say it was the worst book I have ever read, and that is saying quite a lot.
If all this was TL;DR: baby is evil mother-killer in the womb. Sparkly vampires BITE BABY OUT. Reader's innocence is TOTALLY DESTROYED.
09/17/09
...unless, of course, Buffy fell in love with Edward....
...on the other hand, Buffy/Bella girlfight...
09/17/09
I would pay a hefty chunk of money to watch Wesly Snipe's Blade tear through the emo-vamps of Twilight like a hot knife through sparkly butter.
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09/17/09
The kid doesn't kick its way out, though it does break several of Bella's ribs before Papa Vamp gives the mother of all c-sections.
09/17/09
Everything was just major fail. While reading, I was thinking, "Well, at least there will be a massive battle at the end."
NOPE. Thanks, Shield of Love.
And for fuck's sake, Renesmee? What kind of name is that?
09/17/09
/yay Internet, home of hyperbole
//but yes, Renesmee must be the stupidest name ever in the history of spacetime.
09/17/09
And the moral of the story is babies are evil, in or out the womb.
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09/17/09
with that scene (actually, just all of the fourth book), Stephenie Meyers went from delusional to full-blown scary, 'sparkly stalker vampires seem totally sane', 'I am honestly scared of this woman's mind', total psycho.
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11/21/08
"Sadly, the humor from "Twilight" doesn't come from interpretive dance or singing clowns.
Like a taco burp, it arises unbidden at all the wrong moments."
"Confidential memo to Robert Pattinson, who plays Edward: Next time, wax your chest hair. Edward is supposed to look like he's carved from marble, not lambs' wool."
11/20/08
Local review went for the obvious "Put a stake in it", 2 references to Abercrombie and Finch. Said the villains were "Ziggy Stardust rejects in Ren Faire outfits". Said vamp boy talks like Chris Walken.
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11/20/08