What is it with this show combining various lovely lumps with various rubber monsters? It gives the whole show a classy feeling.

Recapping a Flash episode is delightfully easy because the plots are always mind-bogglingly simple while at the same time remaining unbounded by the laws of narrative structure. In this episode, Flash decides he needs to defeat Ming by pretending to be "the one," the guy of prophesy who defeats Ming. So he goes to one of those skull-faced monks who do a lot of Burning Man-style chanting and they tell him that he has to fulfill the final piece of the prophesy and "warm the cold heart of a queen."

Then Flash is magically transported to Frigia, in a shiny silver suit. So he fights to free the queen from the ice, where she has been frozen in the lair of the ice worm by the evil usurper. He frees her, makes friends with another queen who happens to be roaming around in steampunk gear (the ass-grabber above), and then gets them both to pledge their armies to help him fight Ming.

Meanwhile, back on Earth, Dale comes out to her hot journalist girlfriend about having gone to Mongo. There is much agonizing and gazing soulfully at cameras and talking about aliens and danger. And Zarkov does a bunch of funny stuff, including talking to a scientist-hologram who is apparently trapped in evil scientist Rankol's "mind sucker" or "mind eater" or something. I think that may be the same device that makes me watch this show week after week.

Also included in this episode are: one scene where Zarkov pretends to get stoned; one scene where the "female scientist" working for Ming is hypnotized by toothpicks stuck in her forehead; one extremely "why am I here" looking Caribbean witch who tries to have an accent and pretends she's in Pirates of the Caribbean; and one scene where Dale cries and acts like a total pussy as usual.

Mostly the plot revolved around Aura's good-guy Deviate brother stealing Ming's stolen water, handing it out to the poor, and then getting blamed when the water (poisoned by Ming) starts killing people. So Flash has to rescue Good Deviate from some Bad Leatherboys who are mad about the water thing, and that's when Flash and Aura tangle with the tangle tree. Eventually the witch, who is apparently acquainted with the tangle tree, gives them the antidote to the poison water. The hypnotized Female Scientist goes on the radio and denounces Ming as the bad guy, he gets mad, then everything is back to normal. Tune in next week for more of Aura's fucking awesome outfits.

The rest of the episode is taken up with Ming the Miffed using the Imex-reinforced Rift Generator to steal an entire lake from Flash's hometown. Wacky hijinks ensue with the kids all trying to blow up the Rift Generator, discovering there's some gol'durn reason why they can't, and then running around in skimpy outfits until everything is set (sorta) to rights. Plus, Aura's hair is seriously awesome.

The more I watch this show, the more convinced I am that really it should be all about the forbidden love between Aura and Rankol. There could be an intense makeout scene where she plunges her hand into his exposed brain and we see his Secret Segway rolling leg. Oh wait, no.

Dale is possessed! We have to save her! But we also have to save somebody else! OMG, the nerdy Zarkov is rolling on drugged tea and that's so wacky! Luckily, the hardcore assassin Baylin of Mongo was there to remind us that lurking somewhere under the pink froo-froos and the goofy acting and the 1940s plot lines there lies another show — perhaps in an alternate dimension — that is funny and playfully subversive. I just love her deadpan delivery in this clip. After Dale vamps and Flash himboes it up with his "Gee isn't Dale acting funny?" routine, her dry response is perfect: "I do not understand women." Oh Baylin, we'd help you understand if you'd only give us half a chance!