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San Francisco, 1:34 PM
Tue Dec 29
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Avatar Product Placement Teaches Us That Scifi Geeks Get Laid
Those of you who missed the bizarre product placement plotline in TV series Bones earlier this month: Behold, we boiled it down for you. Nerds who work on Bones' team find sex and weird fandom waiting in line for Avatar. More »Even Sheena Easton Understands That Time Travel Creates Alternate Timelines
I wish Sheena Easton would sit McG down and explain time travel to him. In this terrible Outer Limits episode, she understands perfectly that when someone traveled back and changed her future, it created an alternate universe... of adult-contemporary music. More »The Infamous "Snakes Come Out Of A Woman's Breasts" Scene [NSFW]
Were Species 2's nipple tentacles not enough for you? In that case, there's always Thralls aka Blood Angels, which features ultra-convincing CG snakes coming out of a woman's breasts and biting a man in the neck. It's just possibly NSFW. More »Sci-Fi Rewind: Memories of 'Starstuff'
For eighteen episodes during 1980, kids in Philadelphia were given a weekly glimpse into "the future" thanks to a show called Starstuff. Click through to catch up with computers that could see through time and worryingly cheap space colonies. More »The Inexplicable Adventures Of "Zombie vs. Ninja"
So schlockmeister Godfrey Ho got these white guys together, tied scarves on their heads that say "ninja," and made them exchange scintillating dialog after fighting with swords. And it only gets better in Zombie vs. Ninja. More »The Post-Apocalyptic Dance Sequence That The Road Somehow Left Out
When you've survived a post-apocalyptic world of cannibals and evil gangs, there's nothing left to do but have a 1940s-style dance routine. For some reason, this sequence didn't appear at the end of The Road, so we're including it here. More »It Makes Sense That Alien Foot Fetishes Would Be Different... But Still. Really?
Aliens come to Earth intent on wiping out the human race, but first they need to indulge in some really bizarre foot worship, in this utterly disturbing clip from 2003's Evil Alien Conquerors. Flossing? Really?Lady Terminator: Still Better Than Terminator Salvation
Lady Terminator: She's the reincarnation of an ancient killer, thanks to a revolting incident involving a snake, a bikini-clad anthropologist, and a rose-petal-strewn "When Doves Cry" bed. She climbs naked out of the sea and kills men... with sex. More »The Ex-Wife From Hell
There's nothing worse than marrying someone whose ex won't stay away... especially if she's been horribly deformed as a result of a botched teleportation experiment. Curse Of The Fly shows why it's best to keep your partner's exes at bay.Which Is Worse: The Witches Of Breastwick Or The Bare Wench Project? [NSFW]
Two of the most prominent witch movies of the modern era have gotten godawful softcore porn-spoofs. Here's a dreadful clip from Witches Of Breastwick. Click through to see two clips from Bare Wench Project, and vote on which is worse. More »It's Time To Harvest Me Some Irish Zombie
In the charmingly-titled Irish flick Boy Eats Girl, a whole high school gets infected after a young zombie's dalliance with a girl goes south. Luckily, the girl has a giant harvester and she's not afraid to use it! More »Cyborg Assassins Are Really, Really Good In Bed
He's an unstoppable cyborg killer, whose brain is in his stomach... but he's also a sex machine. In 1986's Assassin, a cyborg death-monger needs a place to recharge his batteries, and finds a little romance, in a surprisingly cute scene. More »Come To Post-Apocalyptic Boston For The Eastern European Charm, Stay For The Sewer Mutants
Welcome to the streets of post-apocalyptic Boston, Massachusetts: the plague hit so hard, the buildings look Bulgarian and the cars are all Yugos. It's just one of the charms of Adrenalin: Fear The Rush, including a great sewer mutant fight. More »And Now, At Long Last, The Turkeys Get Revenge
What better way to conclude Turkey Day 2009 than with a forty-year-old fake trailer about a killer 300-foot turkey, shot by a bunch of Caltech astronomers in the style of fifties monster movies? Warning: some truly fowl puns lay ahead! More »An Industrial Lady Machine Menaces Our Heroine! [NSFW]
If you've never seen The Perils of Gwendoline In The Land Of The Yik Yak, then allow me to enlighten you about this glorious moment in the history of exploitation cinema. More »Scariest Dinosaur-On-Dinosaur Violence Ever Filmed?
Just how crazy were film-makers willing to get to convey the awfulness of dinosaur combat, back in the day? Check out this horrendous sequence from 1960's Irwin Allen spectacular The Lost World, in which lizards covered with makeup battle. More »How To Reattach A Severed Robot Head
Rutger Hauer finds a severed robot head on the ground, and helps it get a new body, in this hilariously unconvincing sequence from Omega Doom. Too bad Robot Blade was using that head as a soccer ball... and he's pissed.Watch The Asylum Destroy The World On A Zero Budget
You want to depict a Deadly Crack (TM) threatening to destroy the entire world... but you have no cash? If you're The Asylum, makers of every great Z-grade movie ever, no problem. Here's an exclusive behind-the-scenes clip to prove it. More »Watch Gerard Butler and Christian Bale Reenacting Star Wars
The actors and plot of the film Reign of Fire sound like pure win. It's got Butler. It's got Bale. It's got a post-apocalyptic world destroyed by dragons. And it's even got a Star Wars reenactment. More »This Is What Happens When You Don't Vote For Kodos
Kodos comes to a coffee plantation to lay hundreds of alien eggs, so his offspring can bust out of people Ridley Scott-style. And women can't resist walking towards Kodos' glowing eye. It all leads to the funniest death scene ever. More »Tracy Scoggins Walks In On A Doll And A Shrunken Lady Having Sex On An Oven Mitt
Brick Bardo is an alien the size of a child's doll. Ginger is a normal woman who was shrunk by aliens. Together, they make sweet, sweet love on a kitchen counter... until Tracy Scoggins walks in on them. More »