io9

FAQ. Include # before tag:
#tips,
#calendar,
etc.

San Francisco, 11:11 PM
Mon Nov 9
25 posts in the last 24 hours

Tip your editors: tips@io9.com

Editor-in-Chief:
Annalee Newitz | Email

News Editor:
Charlie Jane Anders | Email

Associate Editor:
Meredith Woerner | Email

Assistant Editor:
Lauren Davis | Email

Weekend Editor:
Graeme McMillan | Email

Contributors:
Joshua Glenn
Stephen Goldmeier | Email
Ed Grabianowski | Email
Austin Grossman
Paul Hogan | Email
Lauren Davis | Email
Chris Hsiang | Email
Lynn Peril | Email
Ann VanderMeer
Alasdair Wilkins | Email

Graphic Designer:
Stephanie Fox | Email

Interns:
Tim Barribeau | Email
Julia Carusillo | Email
Alex Eichler | Email
Cyriaque Lamar | Email
Caitlin Petrakovitz | Email
Mary Ratliff | Email
Josh Snyder | Email

More:
io9 on Facebook
follow io9 on Twitter

posts about #fuckingawesome more →
The Periodic Table of Awesoments

Your version of Internet Explorer is not supported. Please upgrade to the most recent version in order to view comments.

Dsmvwl Admin Promote to frontpage Approve user Ban user ×

Gann
12/19/08

In reply to The Periodic Table of Awesoments
So Steel is made out of Kung Fu, Beer, and a combination of Minigun, Battle Axe, Daggers, Jetpack, Helicopter, Microwave, Tank, Jet Figher, Throwing Stars, and of course Nunchucks.
Reply

Gann was starred Gann was unstarred

geekgrrl
12/19/08

In reply to The Periodic Table of Awesoments
what, no vikings?
Reply

geekgrrl was starred geekgrrl was unstarred

strider_mt2k
12/19/08

In reply to The Periodic Table of Awesoments
Explosion.

Nice.
Reply

strider_mt2k was starred strider_mt2k was unstarred

Ddoom
12/18/08

In reply to The Periodic Table of Awesoments
The simple fact that Ninja is present with an atomic number of 2 while Pirates are delegated an atomic number of 9 will forever keep this chart from attaining true permanence.
Reply

Ddoom was starred Ddoom was unstarred

AmishJohn
12/18/08

@Ddoom: Ninjas are stable solo, while pirates form groups. I see no problem. Plus, pirates tend to be denser than ninja.
Reply

AmishJohn was starred AmishJohn was unstarred

Mathmos
12/18/08

In reply to The Periodic Table of Awesoments
No Pizza?
Reply

Mathmos was starred Mathmos was unstarred

Grey_Area
12/18/08

@Mathmos: Pizza is an alloy.
Reply

Grey_Area was starred Grey_Area was unstarred

AmishJohn
12/18/08

@Grey_Area: They've got cheese and sausage, but seem lacking in substrate materials (tomato & crust) - unless you're supposed to eat them sashimi -style off of the Bb's.
Reply

AmishJohn was starred AmishJohn was unstarred

Evil Tortie's Mom: R.O.A.C.H.
12/18/08

In reply to The Periodic Table of Awesoments
I think chocolate should be a little higher, and WTF at Sagat.
Reply

Daveinva
12/18/08

In reply to The Periodic Table of Awesoments
I think sex might be a little high. Although it *is* difficult to obtain, especially in its enriched form.

That said, if sex is on there, but the blowjob is not? I'm sorry, sex is cool but blowjobs are *awesome*.

Finally-- no ligers?
Reply

Daveinva was starred Daveinva was unstarred

Annalee Newitz
12/18/08

@Daveinva: OMG so true about blowjobs. They should have been on the list.
Reply

Annalee Newitz was starred Annalee Newitz was unstarred

Gann
12/19/08

@Daveinva: Blowjobs are a compound of SX and SG.
Reply

Gann was starred Gann was unstarred

axl456
12/18/08

In reply to The Periodic Table of Awesoments
chuck norris has the 11th number? WTF?!!!

that`s not scientifically correct!!
Reply

axl456 was starred axl456 was unstarred

Gann
12/19/08

@axl456: Actually, He's #1 squared which he allowed them to represent with 11, because he loves bacon so much.
Reply

Gann was starred Gann was unstarred

♥AntiSocialSocialite♥
12/18/08

In reply to The Periodic Table of Awesoments
hoodies, sunglasses, scars, and tattoos = my life story. great placement because that's some heavy shit. would have liked to see sneakers.

mutants are also amazing so.... this person seems really in tune with awesomeness....

p.s. ramen kicks ass.
Reply

Torley
12/18/08

In reply to The Periodic Table of Awesoments
Bob Saget's on it but not Tourettes Guy? Come on now.
Reply

Torley was starred Torley was unstarred

HawaiianActor
12/18/08

In reply to The Periodic Table of Awesoments
i love that Chuck Norris is the only one that does not need an abbreviation. even a fictional list of awesome cannot condense the Chuck Norris.

Also, the idea of a Dr Dragon makes me chuckle
Reply

HawaiianActor was starred HawaiianActor was unstarred

JaviDecimal
12/18/08

In reply to The Periodic Table of Awesoments
I hate to sound like a nag...I see boobs but no....oh wait nevermind I found it...Sausage

and for the record...i love sounding like a nag...buahahaha
Reply

JaviDecimal was starred JaviDecimal was unstarred

ParryLost
12/18/08

@I ♥ Anderson:But you see, only things that straight males like are awesome. Women are are inherently boring unless they are naked, and gay people don't exist. It's true, they did studies! And if you suggest anything else is awesome, you are an evil communist Politically Correct thug who hates fun. Why do you hate fun, WHY?
Reply

ParryLost was starred ParryLost was unstarred

resonanteye
12/19/08

@ParryLost: this chart is so outdated. everyone knows cock belongs right there, next to boobs.

it's the 21st century, people. and I want my scientifically categorized cock!
Reply

resonanteye was starred resonanteye was unstarred

resonanteye
12/19/08

Also, Grace Jones? Not even on there?

the hell
Reply

resonanteye was starred resonanteye was unstarred

jasonof2000
12/18/08

In reply to The Periodic Table of Awesoments
Bob Saget?
Reply

jasonof2000 was starred jasonof2000 was unstarred

Alexis
12/18/08

@jasonof2000:

He's full of psuedo awesome.
Reply

Alexis was starred Alexis was unstarred

bonniegrrl
12/18/08

@jasonof2000: We all wish we could roll with Saget!

Reply

bonniegrrl was starred bonniegrrl was unstarred

AlucardNoir
12/18/08

In reply to The Periodic Table of Awesoments
WTF? sniper before assasin? asasin before vampire? i'll even let the ninja pass, nut Bacon before the bat and mr.t? wtf?
Reply

AlucardNoir was starred AlucardNoir was unstarred

R.O.A.C.H. Creates ACyclicUniverse
12/18/08

@AlucardNoir:

Well, remember, the PToA arranges Awesoments in increasing mass and complexity, so it's the other way around.
Reply

AlucardNoir
12/18/08

@ACyclicUniverse: also, hidrogen is the basic element and source off all other via stelar fusion and wow, for this one it's freaking BACON!!! am i the only one that find's this wrong?
Reply

AlucardNoir was starred AlucardNoir was unstarred

Evil Tortie's Mom: R.O.A.C.H.
12/18/08

@AlucardNoir: Yes, yes you are. Bacon is the foundation of life.
Reply

Gann
12/19/08

@Evil Tortie's Mom: Also - Water, the source of all life on earth, is now two slices of bacon wrapped around a piece of cheese. That sounds about right.
Reply

Gann was starred Gann was unstarred

bonniegrrl
12/18/08

In reply to The Periodic Table of Awesoments
Is it wrong that I'm happy Taco Bell made the list?
Reply

bonniegrrl was starred bonniegrrl was unstarred

Illogic
12/18/08

@bonniegrrl: It depends on who you ask I suppose.

Ask me: Yes.

Ask someone who can't cook: No.

Then again I suppose it depends on what they cook at TB (which is also short for Tuberculosis I just realizes).

I suppose they have tacos there, but other than that. Never been at one, never seen one. I wouldn't visit one even if I had the chance so not much of a problem anyway.

But: back to cooking!

I make an awesome chili, so I should be able to make awesome tacos.

What else do they serve though? I must know this. It well strengthen my belief that I am superior to Taco Bell!
Reply

Illogic was starred Illogic was unstarred

AmishJohn
12/18/08

@Illogic: Taco Bell is Americanized Mexican. Tacos, Burritos, Nachos (which aren't even Mexican) and other pseudo-Latino fare. I'd much rather go to the local, family-owned joint, even (or especially) if I'm the only white guy in the place. You can't go wrong if you have to point and nod. Plus, they've usually got the good Coca-Cola - the stuff made with cane sugar instead of HFCS. Toxic Hell is owned by Pepsi, as is Pizza Hut, Long John Silvers, A & W, and probably a few others.
Reply

AmishJohn was starred AmishJohn was unstarred

Gann
12/19/08

@AmishJohn: I've got a theory about Mexican restaurants (or any food associated with a particular ethnicity). The quality of the food is directly proportionate to the ratio of people in the restaurant of that ethnicity to white people. You get bonus points for each person that works there that doesn't speak any language but the native tongue of the place the food is from. If I have to butcher the Spanish language so the person taking my order can understand me then I know I'm in for a treat.
Reply

Gann was starred Gann was unstarred

Gann
12/19/08

@Gann: Oh, and that Mexican Coca-Cola is the shit.
Reply

Gann was starred Gann was unstarred

♠ Final ♠
12/19/08

@bonniegrrl: See what you started.
Reply

♠ Final ♠ was starred ♠ Final ♠ was unstarred

bonniegrrl
12/19/08

@Final: Oops. Good thing I didn't mention Ramen.
Reply

bonniegrrl was starred bonniegrrl was unstarred

Earlier threads | All threads | Show hidden threads | Show featured threads only | Start a new discussion