<![CDATA[io9: host]]> http://tags.lifehacker.com/assets/base/img/thumbs140x140/io9.com.png <![CDATA[io9: host]]> http://io9.com/tag/host http://io9.com/tag/host <![CDATA[Get Rid of Your Mind-Controlling Parasite in Nine Easy Steps]]> So you’ve gotten yourself infected with mind-controlling parasite. And now the parasite is using your body, running up your credit card debt, and trying to take over your planet. Although possession by an alien parasite often means certain death, we offer a few remedies you should attempt before you resign yourself to a life of extraterrestrial slavery.


Wait It Out

Animorphs: The Yeerks travel throughout the universe, enslaving various species, and are currently working on their conquest of Earth. The slug-like creatures take control of their hosts by crawling in through the ear canal, but can only stay inside for three days at a time, after which they need to leave to absorb the rays from their home sun. They can put off the ray bath by having their host consume instant maple and ginger oatmeal, but too much of the stuff will drive the Yeerks insane.

“The Shadow Out of Time” by HP Lovecraft: The Yithians are not physical parasites, but can take control of another being’s body by swapping minds with their victims. They then control their victims’ bodies, learning all they can. Once they’ve gotten the information they want, Yithians generally let their victims have their bodies back. But, on at least one occasion, the Yithians have held onto another race’s bodies indefinitely.

Conquer it with Willpower

Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan: Ceti eels are not themselves sentient, but nasty little critters will burrow inside its host’s brain, making it extremely susceptible to suggestion. After Khan plants a Ceti eel in Commander Chekov’s ear, Chekov resists Khan’s influence and collapses, causing the eel to slip back out of his ear. It’s not a foolproof method, though; fellow eel infectee Clark Terrell also resists Khan’s order to assassinate Kirk, but ends up shooting himself instead.

Dehydrate It

The Faculty: The faculty of Herrington High School are controlled by yet another breed of ear canal-seeking parasite, giving them the single-minded purpose of spreading the parasites to the entire student body. Fortunately, one of the students keeps around a stash of his homemade recreational drug, which happens to be a diuretic. One shot of that stuff dries up the parasites and probably leaves the victims high enough to write off the whole ordeal as a fever dream.

Angel “The Price”: A swarm of thirsty silicone slugs are the price some pay for using dark magic. The best way to de-worm an infected host is to dehydrate them, which can be achieved by consuming copious amounts of booze. But the slugs assume a limit control over the host’s body, prompting them to drink water until the slugs drain them completely dry.

Build Up Your Post-Infection Immunity

The X-Files: Purity, the fearsome Black Oil that appears throughout the series, is absorbed by humans on contact. The human host becomes a slave to the alien Black Oil, spreading the virus to others and helping the extraterrestrial colonists reproduce. There is a vaccine, albeit a weak one, which has, in some cases, reversed the infection.

Doctor Who “The Invisible Enemy”: After encountering the Swarm, an intelligent virus that controls the infected, the Doctor is repeatedly infected, although thanks to his Time Lord constitution, he is able to overcome his infections. But his companion Leela is entirely immune to the Swarm. When the Doctor finally succumbs to infection, a miniaturized Leela clone enters the Doctor’s body, giving the Doctor her immunity as they force the virus out of his body.

Remove It By Force

Stargate SG-1: The snaky Goa’uld burrow into their host’s brain, accessing its memories and taking control of its body. Removing a Goa’uld symbiote is tricky since it will poison its host if it senses its life is in danger. But a handful of species have developed methods of separating the symbiotes from their hosts.

The Host by Stephenie Meyer: The alien Souls are surgically inserted inside the bodies of other species, possessing individuals so that they can quietly conquer the planet and turn it into a peaceful, carefully controlled paradise. And a person with the correct knowledge can remove the alien in the same manner.

Lexx “Eating Pattern” and “Bad Carrot”: Lexx features a pair of mind-controlling parasites. The snake-like creature in “Eating Pattern” turns Stan into a cannibal and has to be forcibly extracted from his neck. The carrot-shaped drone in “Bad Carrot” enters through the rectum and must be expelled the same way.

Marvel Symbiotes: The alien symbiotes of the Marvel Universe offer their hosts incredible powers, but they merge not only with the host’s physical being, but with their personality as well. But the symbiotes generally have a weakness to heat, sound, or electricity, which can force them to separate from the host.

Infect the Infection

The Puppet Masters by Robert Heinlein: The inspiration for many later mind control parasites, the alien slugs of The Puppet Masters attach themselves to the backs of their hosts, bring the hosts under the aliens’ control. The slugs can be physically detached, but that is not sufficient to control the epidemic. Instead, the resisting humans infect the population with a disease that is fatal to the slugs, treating the humans once their slug masters die.

Defeat It with Alien Superpowers

Ben 10: Alien Force “Max Out”: Ben’s cousin has the misfortune of being attached to a Xenocyte, an alien leech that not only exerts mind control, but also transforms its human host into a DNAlien. But the Omnitrix, the alien device that gives Ben his powers, has a genetic repair function that reverses the melding.

New X-Men “Here Comes Tomorrow”: The sentient bacteria Sublime can also take possession of human bodies and, as John Sublime, has quietly worked behind the scenes in mutant research and living weapons development. In an alternate future, Jean Grey, using the alien Phoenix Force, destroys Sublime once and for all.

Kill the Parasite’s Master

Babylon 5: Keepers, the genetically engineered parasites used by the Drakh to control their victims, cannot be surgically removed and are only sedated by alcohol. But killing the Drakh that spawned the keeper will destroy the parasite without harming the host.

In The Faculty the infection also ends with the destruction of the alien queen, and in the Doctor Who episode “The Invisible Enemy,” killing the disease’s nucleus puts an end to the disease.

Once It’s Off, Switch to a Garlic Shampoo

Futurama: An important step in any brain parasite removal is preventing another infection. Switching to a garlic shampoo deters reattachment, as does wearing a helmet. Just be sure that your friends don’t mistake your fallen brain slug for an unusual hat, or you could be reinfected before you get a chance to wash your hair.

]]>
http://io9.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=5103823&view=rss&microfeed=true
<![CDATA[Who's The Tallest Giant Monster?]]> Now that the Cloverfield monster has won a place in the giant-monster canon, everybody wants to know how he'd do in a fight against Godzilla. The answer: he'd have a chance against the original 1954 Godzilla, but none whatsoever against the newer, twice-as-tall version. See how Cloverfieldy stacks up to other giant monsters in the crucial giantness department, after the jump. (Very minor spoilers only.)

Of course, height isn't everything. But it counts for a lot in monsterland. As Robert B. Parker writes in one of his Spenser novels, a tough tall person will always beat a tough short person in a fight. (He never learned Judo?) So here's our round-up of which giant monster is the tallest:

Ymir. The monster from Venus in 20 Million Miles To Earth, the Ray Harryhausen classic.
Height: Only about 4 meters. Bah.

The Blob. An extraterrestrial lump of flesh-eating goo that stalks Steve McQueen.
Height: It keeps getting bigger and bigger, so it's hard to say how tall it could have gotten. It gets big enough to engulf the Downington Diner, which is probably at least 10 meters tall.

King Kong. America's giant ape, whose only weakness is beauty.
Height: In the 1933 original, he's 50 feet (15 meters) tall. In the Peter Jackson version, he's shrunk to about 8 meters. In Godzilla vs. King Kong, he's suddenly upgraded to 46 meters, so the movie doesn't just consist of Godzilla wiping splatted ape off his foot.

Yongary. The South Korean version of Godzilla.
Height: 50 meters, according to a few sites.yongary.jpg
Cloverfield monster. He's sort of a big ugly thingy with a weird head and evil parasites. Here's an animated gif of him dancing.
Height: These people claim he's about 60 meters. That might be a bit on the short side. He's able to whack some tall buildings. But he does take a swing at the Statue of Liberty, which is only 40 meters tall. So he can't be too much taller than it is, or it wouldn't even have been in his line of vision. Here's one fan's handy chart of how the Statue of Liberty, 1954-vintage Godzilla, and the world's tallest Buddha statue all measure up: amidab.jpg
Gamera. Evil giant armored turtle guy with fireballs and the power to fly at Mach 3.5.
Height: 80 meters.gamera.jpg
Godzilla. Japan's uber-monster and star of a zillion movies.
Height: 100 meters, but it used to be 50.

King Ghidorah. Maybe Godzilla's biggest rival, an awesome three-headed space dragon with bat wings... often mind-controlled into fighting Godzilla and other daikaiju monsters.
Height: 150 meters, but he used to be just 100. Here he is towering over Godzilla. ghidorah07a.jpg
Kroll. Big octopus guy. Pretty much Doctor Who's only entry in the giant monster genre, from "The Power of Kroll." (Okay, there was that Loch Ness Monster, but he was puny.)
Height: His head alone is 250 meters high, according to this site. Here's a clip of him celebrating being the biggest giant monster:

]]>
http://io9.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=351419&view=rss&microfeed=true