• io9
  • science
  • overmind
  • kotaku
  • gizmodo
  • Profile logout login

#humor

io9

Share Cancel
   
Upload an image | Add an image URL
×

logging in
  • FAQ. Include # before tag:
  • #tips,
  • #calendar,
  • etc.

San Francisco, 2:44 PM
Sun Nov 8
11 posts in the last 24 hours

Team

Tip your editors: tips@io9.com

Editor-in-Chief:
Annalee Newitz | Email

News Editor:
Charlie Jane Anders | Email

Associate Editor:
Meredith Woerner | Email

Assistant Editor:
Lauren Davis | Email

Weekend Editor:
Graeme McMillan | Email

Contributors:
Joshua Glenn
Stephen Goldmeier | Email
Ed Grabianowski | Email
Austin Grossman
Paul Hogan | Email
Lauren Davis | Email
Chris Hsiang | Email
Lynn Peril | Email
Ann VanderMeer
Alasdair Wilkins | Email

Graphic Designer:
Stephanie Fox | Email

Interns:
Tim Barribeau | Email
Julia Carusillo | Email
Alex Eichler | Email
Cyriaque Lamar | Email
Caitlin Petrakovitz | Email
Mary Ratliff | Email
Josh Snyder | Email

More:
io9 on Facebook
follow io9 on Twitter

SUBSCRIBE TO io9 RSS

New: Breaking news and daily top stories via email
1428 Subscribers
io9
  • posts about #humor more →

    A New Manual for the Lycanthropic Lifestyle

    Why Supervillains Hate Global Warming

    Look Inside Cobra's Terrorist Organization With Secret Journals

    Babbage and Lovelace Fight Crime with the Power of Math

    10 Tips for Surviving the Zombie Apocalypse

    My Superpower Is More Useless Than Yours

    Joss Whedon and Ron Moore Want to Kill Seth Green

    Are We Feeling Dehumanized Yet?

    Can You Handle John Hodgman's Gift Of Knowledge? No, You Cannot

    Domain Yankers Of Dune!
  • Your version of Internet Explorer is not supported. Please upgrade to the most recent version in order to view comments.
    Dsmvwl  Admin  Promote to frontpage Approve user Ban user ×
    Image of Trai_Dep Trai_Dep
    10/14/09

    In reply to A New Manual for the Lycanthropic Lifestyle
    You know, they can do amazing things with soy beans these days. For those Vegan lycanthropes out there.
     Reply
    Trai_Dep was starred Trai_Dep was unstarred
    Image of Trai_Dep Trai_Dep
    10/14/09

    In reply to A New Manual for the Lycanthropic Lifestyle
    A favorite tip to keep the smug, effete undead at bay when I'M in my wolf form is to eat a Sicilian first thing after transforming. The garlicky breath more than suffices to keep them at a tolerable distance.
    Con: their gold chains are a bitch when they get stuck between my teeth.
     Reply
    Trai_Dep was starred Trai_Dep was unstarred
    Image of rek rek
    10/14/09

    In reply to A New Manual for the Lycanthropic Lifestyle
    Could this be the start of werewolves' turn in the pop culture spotlight!?
     Reply
    rek was starred rek was unstarred
    Image of omgwtflolbbqbye omgwtflolbbqbye
    10/13/09

    In reply to A New Manual for the Lycanthropic Lifestyle
    I think even non-Werewolves could use the chapter on how to handle yourself after you wake up naked in an unknown location... surrounded by dismembered corpses of vagrants and prostitutes...

    Right?
     Reply
    omgwtflolbbqbye was starred omgwtflolbbqbye was unstarred
    Image of ManchuCandidate ManchuCandidate
    10/13/09

    In reply to A New Manual for the Lycanthropic Lifestyle
    Chapter 12: Silver Sucks
     Reply
    ManchuCandidate was starred ManchuCandidate was unstarred
    Image of Aidan_ Aidan_
    10/13/09

    In reply to A New Manual for the Lycanthropic Lifestyle
    I am so getting this next time I'm at the bookstore. :D
     Reply
    Aidan_ was starred Aidan_ was unstarred
    Image of BloggyMcBlogBlog BloggyMcBlogBlog
    10/13/09

    In reply to A New Manual for the Lycanthropic Lifestyle
    Do we get tips on how to keep our chests silky smooth?
     Reply
    BloggyMcBlogBlog was starred BloggyMcBlogBlog was unstarred
    Image of acrobatic rabbit acrobatic rabbit
    10/13/09

    @BloggyMcBlogBlog: Or at least flea and tick remedies?
     Reply
    acrobatic rabbit was starred acrobatic rabbit was unstarred
    Image of SpammerOvTheGods SpammerOvTheGods
    10/13/09

    In reply to A New Manual for the Lycanthropic Lifestyle
    is it a breach of lycan etiquette to lift your leg when you pee?

    #@!
     Reply
    acrobatic rabbit promoted this comment SpammerOvTheGods was starred SpammerOvTheGods was unstarred
    Image of Discodave: R.O.A.C.H. M.O.T.E.L. Discodave: R.O.A.C.H. M.O.T.E.L.
    09/18/09

    In reply to Why Supervillains Hate Global Warming
    Global warming is a drawback, it must be said.

    But also: do they do an online discount? Do they have the finest cotton sheets? Do they have a 24 disposal service (and when I say disposal, I mean removal of tardy or insubordinate henchmen who've been bloodily and, sometimes, unneccesarily dismembered)? Thought not.

    Just dial 1-800-ROACH MOTEL today.
     Reply
    Discodave: R.O.A.C.H. M.O.T.E.L. was starred Discodave: R.O.A.C.H. M.O.T.E.L. was unstarred
    Image of RandomFrequentFlierDent RandomFrequentFlierDent
    09/18/09

    In reply to Why Supervillains Hate Global Warming
    Ha! That's why my lair is in my parent's basement.

    . . . oh.
     Reply
    RandomFrequentFlierDent was starred RandomFrequentFlierDent was unstarred
    Image of Bigdamnhero Bigdamnhero
    09/19/09

    @RandomFrequentFlierDent: I snorted beer out of my nose just now, because this is absolutely not true. No.

    I find the snickerdoodles Mom leaves on the dryer help me focus my eeeevil thoughts. You?
     Reply
    RandomFrequentFlierDent promoted this comment Edited by Bigdamnhero at 09/19/09 12:10 AM Bigdamnhero was starred Bigdamnhero was unstarred
    Image of RandomFrequentFlierDent RandomFrequentFlierDent
    09/19/09

    @Bigdamnhero: And I know all my super villain friends really enjoy the mini-bagel pizzas she sends down during our weekly evil meetings. It really picks you up during a late night of plotting and scheming. Now if I could just get my sister to stay out of my lab . . .
     Reply
    RandomFrequentFlierDent was starred RandomFrequentFlierDent was unstarred
    Image of My_Latest_Incarnation My_Latest_Incarnation
    09/19/09

    @RandomFrequentFlierDent: At least it's not the garage. Do you know how hard it is to plot world domination while you're squeezed into the space between a mini van and the recycling bin? Fucking hard. Especially when nobody puts the goddamn tools back where they belong. I can't fucking build a Illudium Q-36 Explosive Space Modulator without a damn Phillips-head screwdriver, okay? Would it kill you to put it back in the tool drawer where it belongs? Would it?
     Reply
    RandomFrequentFlierDent promoted this comment My_Latest_Incarnation was starred My_Latest_Incarnation was unstarred
    Image of Smeagol92055 Smeagol92055
    09/18/09

    In reply to Why Supervillains Hate Global Warming
    That's why my lair is in Dimension Z. Seriously, what do I care about global warming? As soon as one reality is worn out, I trade it in for the nearest neighboring parallel dimension.
     Reply
    Smeagol92055 was starred Smeagol92055 was unstarred
    Image of crashedpc - Haifisch crashedpc - Haifisch
    09/18/09

    In reply to Why Supervillains Hate Global Warming
    I do all my villaining from inside my head.
     Reply
    crashedpc - Haifisch was starred crashedpc - Haifisch was unstarred
    Image of geiko geiko
    09/18/09

    @crashedpc : ゴキブリ and 蟑螂 division: I'm a good guy!
     Reply
    geiko was starred geiko was unstarred
    Image of Perhaps Not Perhaps Not
    09/18/09

    @crashedpc : ゴキブリ and 蟑螂 division: I do all my villaining inside YOUR head. Mwahahahahahaha!
     Reply
    Perhaps Not was starred Perhaps Not was unstarred
    Image of Mrugby08 Mrugby08
    09/18/09

    In reply to Why Supervillains Hate Global Warming
    Everyone is volcano this and jungle that. What about one hidden under a strip club. You get a hidden base and entertainment at the same time.
     Reply
    Chip Overclock promoted this comment geiko approved this comment Mrugby08 was starred Mrugby08 was unstarred
    Image of Chip Overclock Chip Overclock
    09/18/09

    @Mrugby08: I prefer a penthouse in one of the Las Vegas mega-casinos. Plus, much larger base from which to hire evil minions.
     Reply
    Chip Overclock was starred Chip Overclock was unstarred
    Image of m_faustus m_faustus
    09/18/09

    @Chip Overclock: The perfect location for an evil lair just occurred to me. Under a prison. Maybe a bit light on the entertainment, but perfect for recruitment, and if you run is Shawshank-style you can turn a nice little profit as well.
     Reply
    Evil Tortie's Mom: R.O.A.C.H. promoted this comment m_faustus was starred m_faustus was unstarred
    Image of Evil Tortie's Mom: R.O.A.C.H. Evil Tortie's Mom: R.O.A.C.H.
    09/18/09

    @Chip Overclock: Dear Chip:

    If R.O.A.C.H. doesn't work out, can I join your evil organization? Get me unlimited buffet and daiquiri privileges, plus good A/C, and I'm there.
     Reply
    Evil Tortie's Mom: R.O.A.C.H. was starred Evil Tortie's Mom: R.O.A.C.H. was unstarred
    Image of Chip Overclock Chip Overclock
    09/19/09

    @Evil Tortie's Mom: R.O.A.C.H.: We have a health plan too, BTW. Includes dental and eye care. I'm confident we can skip the entire interview process with you, based on your profile on the Evil League of Evil's social networking site, your evil references, and your reputation in the evil industry.
     Reply
    Chip Overclock was starred Chip Overclock was unstarred
    Image of Kpibca Kpibca
    09/18/09

    In reply to Why Supervillains Hate Global Warming
    This is why I just operate from miles below the surface of New Mexico.
     Reply
    Kpibca was starred Kpibca was unstarred
    Image of Roklimber Roklimber
    09/18/09

    In reply to Why Supervillains Hate Global Warming
    That's why my secret lair is inside the Krakatoa volcano. Unfortunately, rising costs of doing mad science have forced me to rent the place, which is currently occupied by another ioniner (LittleDragon).
     Reply
    Roklimber was starred Roklimber was unstarred
    Earlier threads | All threads | Show hidden threads | Show featured threads only | Start a new discussion

Login

Enter your username and password.

Please enter a username.
Please enter your password.
logging in
Login via Facebook | Sign Up | Forgot Password?

Reset Password

Please enter your email address to have your password reset.

Please enter your email address.
Please enter a valid email address.
requesting password reset

Register

Registering will give you a user profile and the ability to add other users as friends. To become a commenter, however, you need to audition.

Want to know more? Consult the Comment FAQ and legal terms.

Please enter a username.
Please enter a password.
Please confirm your password.
Passwords are not identical.
Please enter a valid email address.
registration sent, waiting for reply

Submit Your Comment

You don't need to login to comment. Just enter your email address below.

See how your address will be displayed in the Comment FAQ.

Please enter a valid email address.
Please enter a valid email address.
logging in

Login with your Facebook or io9 account.

Sign up here.



  • Archives
  • About
  • Advertising
  • Legal
  • Help
  • Report a Bug
  • FAQ
Original material is licensed under a Creative Commons License permitting non-commercial sharing with attribution.