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Incredible Hulk 2:

If there is an Incredible Hulk sequel, it's not a slam dunk that Sam Sterns (the Leader) will be the main villain. Another school of thought has Leonard Samson, the psychiatrist who was dating Betty, becoming the bad guy. He occasionally clashed with the Hulk in the comics, although mostly they're friends. And Samson might be miffed that Bruce stole his girlfriend Betty. Director Louis Leterrier says he'll ask the fans at Comic-Con whom they'd like to see as the villain of TIH2. [Underwire]

Wanted:

Here's this guy's list of a dozen or so weird/wacky things that happen in Wanted. They're pretty much spoilers we've already covered, but his write-up is pretty entertaining and he puts his finger on some of the more ludicrous things in the zany actioner. [XLBBQ]

G.I. Joe:

Here are a couple more character posters from G.I. Joe: The Rise Of Cobra, which show the Baroness and Snake Eyes looking sultry and snakey, respectively. [IESB]

Heroes:

Here are more set photos from Heroes season three, showing Future Peter meeting regular Peter. And getting all grabby with his niece Claire, who's gotten the too-much-makeup bug from Ali Larter. I guess this is right before she shoots him? Are they actually going to get together on the show, now that the actors are dating? Is Peter the character who will turn out to be also adopted? (So they're not blood relations any more?) Or is it just going to be one huge tangle of ick? Either way, it looks like a community college production of Grease. Oh, and is that a painting predicting some kind of future Earth-crack? [TheBadandtheUgly and Heroes The Series and Gilmore Girls News]

And now that you're all pumped up for a new season of Heroes (you are, aren't you?) here's some more news: Kristen Bell's electrosex kitten Elle will be in only about five episodes of the season, give or take. But Mama Petrelli will be in every. single. episode. Because she has "lots to do."

Meanwhile, Sylar and Claire's daddy H.R.G. will have lots and lots of scenes together, because they will be working together. As a team. (This could be related to that rumor that Sylar gets a change of heart?) [E! Online]

Smallville:

Smallville season eight will be more about Metropolis and the whole Lois-and-Clark thang that we used to love back in the 1990s. Plus lots and lots of Green Arrow, with sprinklings of Justice League. [E! Online again]

Doctor Who:

Based on the new trailers, plus some filming that was observed earlier, Planet Galifrey has pieced together more spoilers for Saturday's new Doctor Who, "The Stolen Earth." It starts with the TARDIS still red and cloister belly. And then it catches fire! The Doctor finds that Earth has been stolen, and goes to visit the Shadow Proclamation to find out what's going on. The Proclamation has been offering a refuge to all the races that have lost their worlds already, like the Adipose and the Rexicorocofallipatorians.

And the thuggish Judoon are keeping order for the Shadow Architects, who are skinny and have weird blond hair. The Doctor takes the floor, talking a mile a minute and being clever, but it doesn't go that well. Then he goes back to the TARDIS and has a moment of being happy that Rose is coming back — before he gets another message that shocks him again. The rest of it is spoilers we've covered before in some depth. [Planet Gallifrey]

Stargate

The direct-to-DVD Stargate: Continuum takes advantage of its feature-length format to give more little "moments" to its characters, including Mitchell going back to the farm, Carter going shopping and Daniel going to the bookstore. And later, there are scenes where the world has to adjust to "a world not their own." Carter is an astronaut who brilliantly sacrifices herself and saves her crew. Ben doesn't exist because he literally acted out the "grandfather paradox." And Daniel phones himself and reads his own book. He gives himself a pep talk, saying things like, "Trust your feelings." [Sci Fi Weekly]

Meanwhile, in case you haven't seen it, here's a promo for Stargate: Atlantis season five that's been airing lately.

True Blood:

Here are episode synopses for the second, third and fourth episodes of True Blood, HBO's science-vampires show:

"The First Taste". Sookie suspects Bill is behind the murders of the people who almost ended her life; Tara deals with family matters; and a new church threatens the vampire world.

"Mine". Tara visits LaFayette seeking comfort from her woes, Sookie meets some of Bill's rowdy friends and saves them from harm from a human among them, and, Sookie and Hugo visit the Church of the Fellowship of the Sun.

"Escape From Dragon House." One of the barmaids from Merlotte's is murdered and all signs point to Jason as her killer. Also evident is the fact that she had been around vampires, and Sookie knows just where to go to find out who the girl had been with. Bill introduces Sookie to Fangoria, the biggest vampire bar in Shreveport, and Eric, the oldest vampire in Shreveport. Her search could lead her into territory she never thought she'd cover.

Thanks to Lauren Davis for research help.

The latest Hulk movie involved 147 sets, double the usual number in a big film. That's because Incredible Hulk is a "road movie," with Bruce on the run through lots of different locations. Plus all of the sets had to have visual effects stuff, especially explosions, stuck through them. "We were shooting two or three sets a day," says Petruccelli.

Rio:

• At the start of the film, Bruce is in Brazil, allowing for that huge chase across the rooftops of the favela (slum.) But it was almost Thailand instead. "We were thinking about, 'where would a person want to be an ant in an anthill,'" says Petruccelli. "[Director] Louis [Leterrier] came up with Thailand," and found a cool-looking picture of a Thai slum. But then Petruccelli went online and found a Rio slum that worked even better. "The images we found were just these unbelievable compressed anthills of humanity and that got everybody excited." That way, you got the shots of the soldiers chasing Edward Norton on foot and via helicopter across the rooftops, with the whole vista of the Favela behind him." I mentioned to Petruccelli that it reminded me of the shantytown chase from Jackie Chan's Police Story, and he said, "You find those once in a lifetime, those places are real."
• 
  
• The only parts of the Rio storyline that weren't filmed in Rio were Bruce's apartment, and the area just outside it, plus the bottling plant. Petruccelli worked hard to match the look and feel of the real buildings in the Favela where they were shooting. And that bottling plant was an abandoned warehouse in Toronto. They hunted for a space where the Hulk could move around freely and yet lurk in the shadows. "There was lot of conveyor systems, glass, and machinery," says Petruccelli. "You put it into a slum, so you don't make it a very clean environment, you make it very archaic, of the streets, hot, sweaty, steamy."

Smashing

• In general, a lot of the production design for The Incredible Hulk revolved around finding environments, and things, for the Hulk to smash — sort of the way a video game designer creates lots of objects for players to interact with. Petruccelli worked side by side with the creature designer, Kurt Williams, and his team to imagine how the Hulk would look in different environments. "It's all impact," he says. "This film is all about smash." They had to imagine everything the Hulk could crush, from objects to buildings. Plus how the Hulk would work for that romantic scene in the cave during the rainstorm.
• 
  
• Similarly, imagining the sequence where the army attacks the Hulk in a university quad, the designers thought about what sort of objects the Hulk could use as weapons, including statues, trees and whatever else he could get his hands on. Plus they had to plan out how/where military hardware would be able to move around the University of Toronto campus, where they shot.

Harlem:

• None of the New York sequences were filmed in New York. Instead, a section of Yonge Street in Toronto was transformed into 152nd. street in Harlem, near the Apollo Theater. Both streets have a lot in common, including four lanes of traffic going both directions, small two-story or four-story structures. "Louis fell in love with Yonge St. because of the available light." Ed Norton and the design crew came up with a chase that went through Columbia and up into Harlem.
• 
  
• Petruccelli's team built "many backlots" to create an impression of the poor section of Harlem, which is super-gentrified now. "I wanted to take it back to the 70s," says Petruccelli. "We turned it into a mean streets Taxi Driver version of New York... a representation of what Harlem was rather than what it really is."
• 
  
• Originally, Leterrier wanted to have the giant confrontation between the Hulk and the Abomination in Times Square, but it would have been too difficult to film there or simulate it. "It's a massive undertaking," says Petruccelli. But Norton and Leterrier came up with a different spin on the story. "If you really want two mean-spirited brutalists, creatures fighting each other, the sheen of Times Square wasn't the right place to do it," Petruccelli adds. "Everything in this film was mpre about impact. I would rather see them throw themselves through brick and steel than glass and light structures. Having five foot concrete for them to go through makes it that much more impactful."

  I mentioned that I Am Legend was able to film in Times Square, for the moving scenes where Will Smith walks through a destroyed and abandoned New York. "It's amazing that they were able to do that," Petruccelli says. But the Incredible Hulk shoot was looking for something different: "It's the world's biggest barfight in the world's toughest neighborhood between the world's toughest fighters, rather than a poetic version of what life would be like after the end of the world.

• I asked about whether there's still a post-9/11 taboo on showing New York destroyed, now that Legend and Cloverfield have both trashed the city in different ways. "New York takes a beating in most films," says Petruccelli. "It's because it really is one of the greatest metropolises on the planet, it means so much to so many people. To have a rumble in Cleveland couldn't compare." And New York has a special significance in a Marvel movie: "At the heart of Marvel's history, most of the characters come out of New York."

Antarctica:

• One of Petruccelli's favorite sequences didn't make it into the Hulk movie: the original opening sequence where Bruce Banner is in Antarctica, trying to kill himself, which "pushed the limits of storytelling... It was a really powerful moment, so much so that it was chosen not be a part of the film." Petruccelli was up in the helicopter during the shooting of the sweeping ice fields, the huge emptiness standing in contrast to the crowded scenes of Rio and New York. "Do I miss it?" Petruccelli says. "If the movie works, I don't miss it. [But] that was the shot I really really was excited about."

Incredible Hulk 2?

• Petruccelli hasn't had any conversations yet about a sequel, but he's gung ho to work on any future Marvel projects. "When Hulk ended I raced right into a new project," (the comedy When In Rome.) As for the Marvel crew, "their edit schedule was so massive and so intense, I don't think they've come up for air."

The Avengers:

Could the Hulk be the villain of the Avengers movie? Incredible Hulk director Louis Leterrier thinks so. Just look at Ed Norton's green-eyed evil grin at the end of the Hulk film — he's someone who could potentially enjoy his mayhem a little too much. [Comics2Film]

Wanted:

Here's a new clip from Wanted that cropped up on Entertainment Weekly, involving Angelina Jolie in a giant train crash. [Entertainment Weekly via Comic Book Resources]

Transformers 2:

Want to know what happens in Transformers 2? Do you not care if what you're reading has any conceivable relationship to the truth? Then check out this allegedly leaked treatment for the Transformers sequel, which is probably a fake. In a nutshell, Sam goes to NYU and gets drawn into the world of street racing. And Megatron gets resurrected thanks to Soundwave's "mystic healing" harmonizing his particles. It turns out that Las Vegas' glittery lights were powered by the Allspark, and there's still enough stored Allspark-energy to power Vegas for generations — but the Decepticons and Starscream are coming to claim Vegas' power source for themselves. There's a massive battle for Las Vegas, and specifically the Luxor casino, which is the gateway to the remaining Allspark energy. The U.S. Army tries to trigger an EMP, but fails, and Vegas is trashed. And Sam's girlfriend Mikaela is killed. The movie ends on a downer note, with our heroes in disarray until the third movie... but Mikaela miraculously comes back to life at the last moment. [Scribd via CobaltSS]

G.I. Joe:

UGO has one of its patented spoiler round-ups for the G.I. Joe movie, and this time there's a fair bit of info we haven't reported, maybe because we weren't covering this movie much until recently. The main villains are Destro and Baroness, with Cobra Commander as a shadowy manipulator behind the scenes. Cobra Commander is played by Joseph Gordon-Leavitt, and it's rumored he's General Hawk's best friend and a former G.I. Joe who fell from grace. (He and Hawk went on a mission to stop Destro, and Cobra Commander was scarred horribly and turned evil, the way people do when their faces get scarred.)

The rivalry between the two ninjas, Storm Shadow and Snake Eyes, forms the heart of the movie — it's rumored they studied with the same sensei and fought for two days without landing a single blade. But Snake Eyes made a mistake and was deafeated, so he went to Brazil and learned a new weapons-free discipline. The evil organization Cobra enlists the aid of the mercenaries known as Dreadnoks, led by Zartan and his brother and sister, Zarana and Zandar. Zandar has the ability to change his skin color to blend in with his surroundings. There's more at the link. [UGO]

The Descent 2:

Here's the first look at the Crawlers from The Descent 2, in which a traumatized Sarah emerges from the caves covered with blood. The police force her to go back into the caves to help them look for her five missing friends, but she starts having flashbacks and remembering more of the horror she endured there, as the group gets closer and closer to getting trapped in the dark with those monsters. [Fangoria]

Battlestar Galactica:

In the remaining 11 Battlestar Galactica episodes, airing next year, we'll see the relationship between Bill Adama and Laura Roslin deepen. And we may get more of a sense that Laura has been grooming Lee Adama as her successor all along, despite their disputes. And Roslin actor Mary McDonnell definitely seems to think they just found Earth. In the rest of the season, she says, "whatever has been complicated becomes more so." [Zap2It]

We haven't seen the real reactions of our characters to their discovery in last Friday's episode yet. "Revelations" and the next episode fit together closely, like a two-parter, and they're meant to be seen a week apart, says writer Jane Espenson. [TV Squad]

Lost:

Actor Cynthia Watros (Libby) accidentally refers to her Lost character as Annie. Was this a slip of the tongue... or did she let slip something by accident? And apparently we may see more of Libby at some point, and have some of our lingering questions answered. [Spoilers Lost]

Heroes:

It turns out Claire isn't the only character on Heroes who's adopted. And the discovery of another adopted character will change... everything! We'll see more of Monica and Nana Dawson (Nichelle Nichols) in episodes focusing on their relationship with Micah. But we probably won't see any more of Claire's beau West. [E! Online]

Chuck:

In the fourth episode of Chuck's second season, an old high-school friend of Sarah's named Heather shows up at the Orange Orange, Sarah's new job. And Heather blurts out Sarah's real name, shocking Chuck, who has fun almost blowing Sarah's cover and finds out more about Sarah's background. Heather is married to another high-school classmate of Sarah's, a nerd who turns out to be more than he seems when Chuck meets him and "flashes" on him.

So Sarah and Chuck have to go undercover at Sarah's high-school reunion, to foil the sales of high-tech bombs to evil Russians. Chuck manages to look like a hero while Casey fumes, and Sarah confronts her high-school demons. Meanwhile, Lester teaches the nerds at Buy More about "friendly negotiations" with customers, with unexpected results. [Chuck TV]

The Middleman:

Says Middleman star Matt Keeslar of upcoming episodes:

We have a Peruvian flying pike that, when it injects its venom into a victim, the victim turns into a trout-craving zombie. We have several different aliens from different planets. From one planet they happen to look like people on Earth who have had a lot of plastic surgery. From another planet they're a boy band. From another planet they embody a 14-year-old. And then there are, of course, other more fantasy-type characters, like an ancient terra cotta warrior who comes back to life to find and bring the heir to the Xing Dynasty to the underworld.

Just a wild guess, but I think he meant Qing Dynasty, not Xing. [Comic Book Resources]

1. Hyde is locked into a battle of wills with Jekyll.
What was missing from this version of Hulk, but not from many of the best comic books about him (including the recent and superlative Planet Hulk series), was a sense that Hulk hates Bruce as much as Bruce hates him. As Charlie pointed out in her review, this Hulk was too emo and dejected. He never challenges Bruce's right to take back his body, and never complains about how Bruce maligns him. Basically, we needed this Hulk to have more psychological complexity.

2. Hyde has goals.
We know as the Incredible Hulk flick starts that Bruce has been Hulking out for five whole years. And yet when Hulk comes out, he can barely talk and just rampages randomly. He hasn't developed any ideas of his own over the past five years? We know what Bruce wants, but what does Hulk want? The thing that's great about Hyde in the Robert Louis Stevenson novella, as well as the countless subsequent movies, is that Hyde has a plan. He wants to kill people who remind him of his monstrous status sometimes, but at other times he wants to drink, party, and make out with hookers. He's a bad boy who can't stand Jekyll's nice, upper-crusty doctor. The only time we ever know what Hulk wants is at the very end of the movie when he yells "Hulk smash!" Good, Hulk, good. You've expressed an opinion. Now we want more of that.

3. Hyde embraces evil.
Nearly every version of the Hyde tale, from the 1950s Kirk Douglas version to the 1990s Dr. Jekyll and Ms. Hyde version with Sean Young, has the big guy embracing darkness. One possible exception is in the League of Extraordinary Gentlemen comic books, where Hyde is something like Hulk was in Planet Hulk — a dark superhero for a dark task. Hulk has embraced evil in his time too, though generally he just wants to be left alone. But why not, for the purposes of this movie, fill out Hulk's character by having him flirt with evil?

4. Jekyll bears some responsibility for creating Hyde.
Perhaps the most bothersome aspect of the Hulk movie was that Bruce was so nice and upstanding. (And as I've already said, his Hulk was totally emo.) Even though he helped invent the scary juice that brought out his Hulk side, he's somehow been duped into it by the military? What? Does that even make sense? I mean, he knows he's working for the military. He knows the military makes weapons. What the hell does he think they are after, anyway? In the Jekyll/Hyde mythos, Jekyll bears full responsibility for letting loose his inner demons on London. He's whipped up this serum and takes it, exactly like Bruce does. So why don't we get more of Bruce angsting over how he basically turned himself in a super soldier? What I'm really asking for here is more development of Bruce's character. OK, so he's some kind of semi-ninja who knows how to evade authorities and slip from Mexico into the U.S. But doesn't he feel guilty for what he's done, too? Can't we get a little soul-searching, here?

5. Jekyll and Hyde make up two parts of a whole.
One of the reasons why the Jekyll/Hyde mythos has endured to this day is that it's easy for audiences to understand how Hyde is the dark side of Jekyll. Dr. Jekyll is a kindly person, usually a guy who wants to help the poor and leads a respectable middle-class life among other bourgeois types. Hyde is clearly his repressed Id: he's greedy, filled with hate and lust, and wants only to exploit the vulnerable for amusement. But what exactly is Hulk in the Incredible Hulk? Is he Bruce's repressed rage? His repressed excitement? What? I'm not asking for the whole problematic Ang Lee "my dad was mean" subplot — I'm just asking to get a sense that Bruce had the Hulk in him even before the experiments and gamma poisoning. I love Ed Norton and I know the guy can act up a storm, but honestly I got more feeling for the character of the mad scientist who helps Bruce de-Hulkify before getting dosed with gamma blood and starting to become the Leader.

The whole point of Hulk comics, and what makes them such compelling reading, is that Hulk is a character study. Sure, he's all about the SMASH, but he's also about human psychology. Just like Jekyll and Hyde are. If Hulk is to go down in cinematic history the way Hyde has, he's going to have to grow a psyche and fast. Pages from the Incredible Hulk #368, by Peter David.

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So, first we have Incredible Hulk director Louis Letterier saying that we "might see" Captain America in the new Hulk movie, then we hear that that scene's been cut from the theatrical release. Now we have the movie's producer telling us that Captain America is in the theatrical version of the movie after all... sort of.

According to Latino Review's interview with The Incredible Hulk's producer, Gale Anne Hurd, there's a version of Captain America in the new movie, it's just that it's not an entirely human version:

LatinoReview: What was Louis talking about when he said Captain America was in the film?

Hurd: He didn't really mean the character of Captain America, unless there's something that I don't know. It's the serum.

LatinoReview: I felt that there was a presence around the film of Captain America, and not that you actually see him.

Hurd: Exactly.

LatinoReview: Is Captain America in the frozen tundra? Cause on the trailer we see Banner walking on the tundra and I wanted to know if Captain America was in that scene or not?

Hurd: Captain America was not visible in that scene.

LatinoReview: There was a lot of talk because you do see the Captain America shield in 'Iron Man'

Hurd: Right. Well we do have the serum. If you look at the movie again you'll see that the serum is Captain America.

May I be the first to say "Oh, bullshit." The serum is the cameo that Letterier was touting? Seriously? Either this is some kind of cover-up for something that wasn't supposed to be leaked ahead of time, Letterier is astoundingly literal (I mean, sure, the serum makes him Captain America, but does that really make the serum itself Cap?), or Hurd is just dancing around hoping that everyone'll stop asking the question.

One thing's for sure: Looks like we have confirmation that the Marvel movies are following the Ultimate line of comics in terms of backstory... Maybe this means we'll get a movie version of Spider-Man and his Amazing Friends after all.

Exclusive: Gale Anne Hurd Talks Hulk, No Captain America [Latino Review]

Incredible Hulk:

Some new clips from Incredible Hulk went up at IGN, and here they are — including a fair bit of new footage. [IGN]

Transformers 2:

Is Optimus Prime in mourning? Apparently the Transformers 2 shooting just included a scene at Laurel Hill Cemetery in Fairmount Park, PA, where Optimus himself was hanging out. [Seibertron]

The Dark Knight:

Here's a new The Dark Knight TV spot, which reveals that some kids are annoying in the film. And the Joker makes a weird "Hmm" noise.

The Happening:

Here's a spoilery review of M. Night Shyamalan's The Happening. Bits of new information include the fact that the mass suicides start in New York's Central Park. And then a ton of construction workers jump off a high-rise. And the convoluted scientific explanation for what's going on starts emerging pretty early in the movie, mostly through long speeches by Marky Mark and an eccentric nursery owner. Marky Mark and friends stay on the run, trying to avoid the wave of suicides — and at one point, they're in a field trying to outrun the wind, and things get silly. [Fangoria]

And there are some new clips from The Happening at this link. [MovieWeb]

Hancock:

A new TV spot for Will Smith's Hancock highlights the part of the movie that makes me uneasy: the whole god-who-can't-go-near-Charlize-Theron subplot. Hancock is becoming mortal! [Worst Previews]

Star Wars: Clone Wars:

Some new Star Wars: Clone Wars desktop patterns show a new look at Obi-Wan, Ahsoka and Anakin. Plus, cute.

Doctor Who:

Here's a sneak peek from Saturday's new Doctor Who episode, the first to be written by showrunner Russell T. Davies since the series premiere. [Spoiler TV]

Lost:

I don't know if you care what Lost star Jorge Garcia thinks is going to happen next, but it sounds pretty great to me. Garcia predicts his character Hurley will have lots of buddy-comedy road-trip adventures with Sayid, who picked him up from the sanitarium in the season finale. (I would totally watch that.) And Garcia thinks the show will end with a fight over the island between different groups that lay claim to it. [E! Online]

Terminator: The Sarah Connor Chronicles:

Here's the first pic of Garbage singer Shirley Manson on the set of Terminator: The Sarah Connor Chronicles, where she plays a software mogul. [Legion Of Geek]

Smallville:

Lois will only appear in 13 episodes — give or take a couple — of Smallville season eight. [TV Guide]

Chuck:

The episode ominously titled "Chuck Vs. The Breakup" will introduce a new agent named Juliette, who's 27 years old and looks ethereal, like one of the elves from Lord Of The Rings. But she's all business. The episode also features the leader of a Columbian cartel and Hans, a scary Nordic man. [TV Squad]

Spectacular Spider-Man:

Spider-Man fights Venom at last in the Spectacular Spider-Man finale. Here are some pics! Am I on crack, or does the middle one look sort of Miyazawa-esque?

This summer's superheroic vows of chastity:

Okay, now that you've consented to be spoiled, our two abstinent heroes are the Hulk and Hancock. Actually, in the case of Hancock, it's not strictly true that he can't have sex — according to early screening reports, he simply has to be very, very careful where, and how, he ejaculates. In one scene from Hancock (which had the original title of Tonight, He Comes) Hancock has brought a cute young thing back to his trailer, and they're getting busy. But then Hancock gets close to his climax, and warns the woman to back way, way up. Hancock gets off — and we see his semen riddle his ceiling with holes, almost like bullet holes. (Comics afficionados will not be surprised to learn this scene is ripped off from a Garth Ennis comic.)

As for the Hulk, there's a scene in Friday's new movie where Bruce Banner is in a motel room with Betty. They start to do what the young people do in motel rooms, and Bruce's heart-rate monitor gets more and more bleepy. His heart is pounding with the excitement of making out with a vacant-eyed Liv Tyler, it's too much for him, he's losing his shit, he's going to, oh my god, he's going to... he's going to... Bruce pulls away from Betty just in time to keep from becoming the Hulk. Yes, he can't get sexually aroused without Hulking out. (And I am not going to make any jokes about whether you would like him when he's horny. I'm better that that.)

A digression: Can the Hulk really not get laid?

I'll get to the list of other sexually frustrated heroes in a second. Since I've read almost every Hulk comic ever published (except I admit Bruce Jones lost me after a while) I should stick in a little dissertation about the Hulk's sexual history. Can the comics version of the Hulk really never have sex? We know that the Hulk is Incredibly, perhaps Unfeasibly, well-hung, because the Hulk gets naked in Incredible Hulk #400 and his arch-enemy The Leader remarks on how well-endowed he is. But it's strongly implied, during the "gray Hulk" period, that the gray Hulk — who's working as a Las Vegas leg-breaker — is getting laid on a fairly regular basis.

Bruce and Betty have sex at least twice that I can think of. Once when they first get married, after Bruce has been "cured" of being the Hulk (so there's no danger of Bruce Hulking out.) And once when Bruce gets his pathology backwards, so he's either a peaceful Hulk or a savage, rampaging puny human. In his "savage Banner" form, Betty has sex with him and this calms him down.

There's also the famous sequence in Hulk #300, where the Hulk has gone completely berzerk and Bruce's influence is all gone. The Hulk is trashing New York, and Eros, "the creepiest Avenger" tries to subdue the Hulk using his psychic abilities to generate "waves of pleasure." He learns the hard way that you shouldn't try to pleasure the Hulk in the middle of his rampage. Still more evidence, I guess, that the Hulk and sex don't usually mix. Unless he's gray.

(Update: Commenters have pointed out that the Hulk hooked up with Caiera The Oldstrong in Planet Hulk, the greatest Hulk storyline ever. But she's an alien who's almost impervious to most harm, so it's slightly different.)

I can't have sex, or I'll steal your powers/life/money:

Poor Rogue from the X-men. She's got the cool Susan Sontag hair, and the leather jumpsuit, and the hot boyfriend... but she can never touch anyone. Whenever she does touch another person, she absorbs their memories, strength and physical abilities. She also steals people's superpowers with her touch. She's tragically untouchable. The sexual frustration is so horrendous, it drives her to get rid of her powers in X-Men 3.

I can't have sex because I'm a robot, with non-functioning sex parts:

Beautie is one of the members of the Honor Guard, one of the main superhero teams in Astro City, Kurt Busiek's fictional superhero town. She's always looked like a Barbie doll, but we've never known much about the robot girl — until Busiek published the Astro City Character Special: Beautie last February. There, we see some "pick-up artists" try to hit on Beautie, only to be told that she has no genitalia. None whatsoever.

Other robot or cyborg superheroes who can't have sex include Robotman from the Doom Patrol and Vic Stone aka Cyborg from the Teen Titans. But this isn't true for all robo-heroes, as Star Trek's Data would tell us. The hordes of comic book sex-perverts are pretty certain that the Vision, the android member of the Avengers, did in fact get it on with the Scarlet Witch when the two of them were married.

I can't have sex because my super-strength will end you:

Hancock sort of belongs in this category, since his sperm are deadly to human females. So, too, does Superman, according to Larry Niven, who famously thought way too much about the implications of Krypto-sperm. Besides the speeding-bullet properties of the sperm themselves, there's the fact that Superman might cause an injury if he got too excited during intercourse — and according to the movie Mallrats, the sperm would probably tear Lois Lane's fallopian tubes apart as well. Some self-proclaimed experts also believe Wonder Woman is incapable of having sex with a normal human, for similar reasons.

Spider-Man, meanwhile, has a slightly different problem: He can have sex. But prolonged exposure to his ummm... radioactive bodily fluids eventually kills his wife Mary Jane in a future dystopian story, Spider-Man: Reign by Kaare Andrews.

No sex, please, I'm dead.

There are a surprising number of superheroes who are dead, either undead or ghosts... and most of them never get laid. I'm thinking of Deadman, who's insubstantial except for when he takes control over a living body. (And his ethics might prevent him from using someone else's body as a vehicle for sex, I'm guessing.) And the Spectre, who's basically the spirit of vengeance — he can become tangible, but I'm highly doubtful he ever gets any. (Although the Ostrander run on The Spectre did get a bit saucy at times.)

Basic incompatibilities:

And then finally there are a number of superheroes whose bodies are just not compatible with anybody else, for various reasons. Like Mogo, who's an entire planet and a member of the Green Lantern Corps. Who can Mogo have sex with? Element Lad from the Legion of Superheroes was celibate for a long time because he was the last of his kind, but did finally find love with a member of the Science Police who took a sex-change drug. There's Negative Man from the Doom Patrol, who's basically a radioactive mummy who has to wear protective bandages at all times, and (I think) can never touch anybody without the bandages in the way.

Update: I totally forgot I was going to write a whole thing about Ben Grimm from the Fantastic Four in here, because it's hinted at various times that he has nothing but more rocks under his little shorts. His girlfriend, Alicia, dumps him and starts dating Johnny Storm, the Human Torch. She makes it pretty clear that this is the first time in ages that she's gotten any action — meaning she wasn't getting any when she was with Ben. Poor Ben.

Thanks to Douglas Wolk for research help!

According to director Louis Letterier, they cut out a scene where Bruce goes to the Arctic to commit suicide when he realizes there isn't a cure for his Hulk side (but it's in the trailer — see screenshot above.) But more importantly than Banner's Hulk-related depression is that was the scene where he ran into Captain America. So now everyone will have to wait until the DVD, or until it's leaked on the internet. Do you really think that's the reason they cut out the Captain? My guess is they couldn't agree on casting, or how much of him to show. [Cinemablend]

Hancock:

Here's a new clip from Hancock, which just went online. (A few moments of it were in the trailer, but not the part with the car, I guess.) I have to admit I'm warming to this movie a bit. But the immortal-god thing is still a stumbling block for me, I guess. [Comic Book Resources]

The Incredible Hulk:

We've pretty much reached spoiler saturation point on the new Hulk movie — in large part thanks to Marvel releasing half the film as trailers and TV spots — but there are still a few bits and bobs coming out.

Actor Greg Bryk says he plays a member of an elite squad of commandos, who are hand-picked to chase down Bruce Banner. They drop into Brazil and chase Banner through the slums of Rio, across the rooftops, "parkour" style. And it ends very, very badly for these soldiers when Banner turns into the Hulk. [SliceofScifi]

Wanted:

And here's the "redband" (R-rated) trailer for Wanted, which includes more violence and (gasp!) Morgan Freeman saying the "MF" word. It also gives away more plot twists from the film, including a character death. It's also downloadable via iTunes. [Canmag]

Battlestar Galactica:

Here's a new clip from Saturday's Battlestar Galactica episode, "Revelations." Any clue why she's asking for only four Cylons? (Except for the obvious reason that the producers don't want to reveal the fifth yet?) [Gateworld]

Dollhouse:

Firefly creator Joss Whedon's new mindwiped super-agents show Dollhouse will introduce two characters for the first time in its second episode: the Actives' personal physician, Dr. Claire "The Phantom" Saunders (Amy Acker) and November, an Active who specializes in personal missions instead of criminal ones. But we'll glimpse Dr. Saunders in the pilot.

Also, among the characters that Eliza Dushku's Echo will become early on are a world-weary alcoholic, helping fellow addict Danika make it through a rough patch, a man's stunning date to his ex-girlfriend's wedding, and a Spanish-speaking thug who intimidates a gang of fellow criminals.

Adelle, who runs the Dollhouse, tells a client: ""This will be the purest, most genuine human encounter of your life. And hers. It is a treasure. One I guarantee you will never, never forget."

After a mission, Echo feels compelled to return to the Dollhouse, and we follow her through the memory-scrubbing process administered by uber-nerd Topher. During downtime, she's childlike and empty, having conversations like: "Echo: I swam thirty laps today. Sierra: Good for you. Echo: I'm tired now. Sierra: It's important to exercise. I try to do my best."

Topher realizes Echo, Victor and Sierra always seem to herd together — which may indicate they're starting to keep some memories. He tells Boyd, the Actives' handler. Boyd and Topher the programmer share this exchange: "Boyd: If this isn't the second coming or giant bats I'm gonna kick your tiny boy ass. Topher: Giant bats would be awesome." Boyd is worried Adelle will have the three Actives killed if she suspects they're retaining memories, but Adelle is too preoccupied with throwing FBI agent Paul Ballard (Battlestar's Tahmoh Penikett) off the Dollhouse's scent, using Echo as bait. There's way more at the link. [The Futon Critic via Whedonesque]

Heroes:

Jesse, the new Heroes badass played by Francis Capra, does have at least one scene with Elle (his former Veronica Mars castmate Kristen Bell) and also crosses paths with Peter. [12-12-12]

Oh, also, I forgot to mention that the time-traveling dark-haired Claire says she has always loved her uncle Peter right before she shoots him in the first episode of the new season. And we'll meet Daphne, Hiro's speedster arch-enemy, in the first episode of the new season. Also, the Aboriginal storyteller we've mentioned is named Usutu, and he appears in (at least) the third and fourth episodes of the new season, played by N'Tare Mwine. [Watching Heroes]

The Middleman:

Here's a new trailer for The Middleman, which gives you more of a sense of Wendy's journey from jilted girlfriend and art student to kickass superhero. Why are you not jumping up and down with excitement?

Incredible Hulk:

You know how the Hulk talks in the new movie? And says "Hulk Smash!" Well, here's a TV spot where they show it. There, that's your last reason to see the movie gone. [Cinema Gaslight]

(BTW, I saw Hulk, and there was no Captain America cameo that I noticed. I even sat all the way through the endless credits, and no easter egg — other than the Tony Stark cameo before the credits. But maybe there will be a post-credits easter egg in the non-preview versions, as there was for Iron Man?)

Transformers 2:

More details about the filming of the air-and-space museum scenes of Transformers 2, where Shia and friends are searching for a hidden Transformer. Shia dresses in an old-timey aviator outfit, with white scarf and goggles (maybe to blend in with the mannequins?) and tasers a security guard. And at one point John Turturro points at the Blackbird SR-71 (which plays a huge role in the movie apparently) and yells "Decepticon! Get behind the MIG!" [Superhero Hype]

Hancock:

Here's a featurette about the making of Hancock that includes some new footage, including Hancock taking a whiskey bottle into the bathroom. Plus it puts the footage you've already seen in a bit more context. (It's from a Korean site, hence the subtitles.) [Naver via Comic Book Resources]

Watchmen:

The scene from the dystopian Alan Moore graphic novel Watchmen where the young Kovacs (Rorschach) walks in on his sex-worker mother with a client will appear in the movie. And in fact, director Zack Snyder's own son plays young Kovacs in that scene, where he sees his mother in bed with a strange man, who then flees. And the mother belts the child in the face for losing her business. The scene will be a bit shorter than in the movie and may appear during flashbacks when Kovacs is talking to his psychiatrist. [ComicRelated]

Lost:

Apparently ABC has been asking focus groups how they feel about Michael's death on Lost, and whether they'd want Michael to come back from the dead. So maybe his death isn't final after all? Also, it's possible Walt, and Sun and Jin's child, also have to go back to the island along with all the adults. [E! Online]

Heroes:

In the first few minutes of Heroes season three, Claire shoots at her uncle Peter. And we see Claire with dark hair, due to a "shift in time." (It sounds as though this will be a future version of Claire.) [E! Online again]

Chuck:

On Chuck, Morgan saves Anna from some video-game jocks who are being mean to her. (Probably the same jocks who are taking over the home theater dept. at Buy More for their own personal frat house.) [E! Online again]

Also, Chuck dies this season... twice! And they've cast the role of the debonair ex-spy who teaches Chuck to be more of a ladies man, and it's not Roger Moore. It's... John Larroquette??. (Okay, that's different.) Also, as we may have mentioned, Arrested Development's Tony Hale plays a "corporate efficiency expert" who comes in to shake up the Buy More. And Michael Clarke Duncan plays a great villain. [Chuck TV]

Doctor Who:

Supposedly this is the first picture of Davros, the evil creator of the cyborg Daleks, from the tail end of the current Doctor Who season. Real or fake? You decide. (I'm thinking it looks a bit too cheesy to be real, but you never know, and people are posting it all over.) [Pop Culture Zoo]

The Middleman:

Here's the official synopsis for the second episode of superhero show The Middleman:

When a Terra Cotta Warrior is brought back to life, The Middleman and Wendy set out to stop him before he can take the last living heir of the Qin dynasty to the land of the dead, releasing a hail of fire that will rain down on the Earth for a thousand years. With some help from fashionista and reformed succubus, Roxy Wasserman, the two must make a daring trip to the underworld to get the deed done. But will Wendy be able to focus on their latest mission, or will the fallout of her argument with Lacey get in the way?

Still stinging from Wendy's harsh criticisms, Lacey lands herself a job as Roxy's assistant, which tests her activist spirit.

[Spoiler TV]

I'm trying a slightly different format here. Instead of doing it by days of the week, I'm grouping things into categories. The highlights of this week's TV are:

Hulk-mania. Your screen will be green this week, as television hypes this weekend's release of The Incredible Hulk with all its might. The Sci Fi Channel is showing marathons of the Hulk TV show all day, every day, this week (including right now.) And an exclusive three-minute Hulk clip (featuring Banner's transformation) will air during Sci Fi's new Ghost Hunters episode on Wednesday at 9. (Just how badly do you want to see a Hulk clip? In any case, I have a feeling it'll turn up on various blogs, including this one, pretty quickly.) Just to top things off, Sci Fi is showing Ang Lee's Hulk movie on Thursday at 9, just to get the mutant poodle cravings out of your system before you see the new poodle-free movie.

There's more! HBO has a "First Look" special about the Hulk on Wednesday evening at 9:30. Also, Hulk star Liv Tyler is on Jimmy Kimmel's Game Night primetime special on Thursday and Regis And Kelly on Friday. And Tim Roth is on the regular Jimmy Kimmel late night show Thursday night. (I sort of vaguely remember this movie had a male lead, but I can't remember his name. And anyway, he's not doing any appearances.)

Other movie promo. HBO has a "First Look" at Get Smart tonight at 8:30. And the stars of M. Night Shyamalan's doomed R-rated disaster movie The Happening are promoting it as hard as they can: Marky Mark is on Letterman tomorrow night, Regis and Kelly Wednesday daytime and Conan O'Brien Wednesday night. And Zooey Deschanel is on Letterman Wednesday.

Battlestar's season finale. I'm just putting it out there: Friday night's Battlestar Galactica is a season finale, since the second "half" of the season won't see the light of day until 2009 by all accounts. At least the finale has the promising title of "Revelations," and unless the promo is totally deceptive (like last week's promo) we actually see the four secret cylons "come out" about their status. But here, you can watch and judge for yourself. And then tune in on Sci Fi at 10 on Friday.

Doctor Who and the labors of Hercule. This week's Doctor Who (Friday on Sci Fi at 9) is the one where he meets Agatha Christie. It's quite similar, in a way, to the ones where he meets Charles Dickens and William Shakespeare. But that doesn't make it any less entertaining, and there are some nice treats, including a weird moment with a clergyman. Here's our recap of the episode, and here's a chunk of the episode itself:

More universe-hopping fun. And before Doctor Who and BSG, Sci Fi has the second episode of South African/Canadian universe-hopping show Charlie Jade at 8 PM. Charlie starts to realize he's not in his real universe when he comes to Cape Town instead of Cape City. And his apartment is derelict and trashed. Meanwhile, the evil Corporation chooses an agent to be their emissary to the other universes.

Awesome cartoons. Saturday at 10 AM is the season finale of Spectacular Spider-Man on The CW. "Nature Vs. Nurture" deals with the running black costume/Venom storyline. Eddie Brock has finally merged with the symbiote and only has one goal in mind — to destroy Spider-Man. Also at 10 AM Saturday, there's a new Ben 10: Alien Force on the Cartoon Network: "Cash and JT steal a gauntlet from Kevin's car and decide to use it against Ben, but an evil spirit within the glove possesses Cash instead."

And at 10:30 AM Saturday on Cartoon Network, there's a new Transformers: Animated, "Autoboot Camp." Bumblebee reminisces about his days in Autobot Academy (will there be hazing? Please tell me there's hazing!) and an Autobot cadet he met named Wasp. Bumblebee learns Wasp has been sprung from prison and decides to track him down. And here's most of the episode already, presumably from its early airing overseas.
Meanwhile, am I the only person who didn't know "Weird" Al Yankovic was doing voice work for this show?

Adult swim. More awesome cartoons air Sunday night as part of Cartoon Network's "Adult Swim" block. There's a new Venture Bros. at 11:30 PM, called "The Invisible Hand of Fate" — but I couldn't find an episode description anywhere. What do they have to hide?? Also, there's a new Metalocalypse at midnight, called "Dethrace." And here's the synopsis:

Murderface plans a racing event with support from Nathan and Pickles. Meanwhile, Skwisgaar and Toki try to get licenses.

Strain yourself again. In case you missed out on the awesomeness (well, it was sorta pretty) of A&E's remake of The Andromeda Strain, it's showing during the day on Friday, at 9 AM and 2 PM. It's got Bucky balls, and Benjamin Bratt, and mopey boys on mopeds. And Will from Will and Grace running through a biohazard zone getting shot at, and somehow not dying.

Superhero movies. In case you want to channel your inner superhero-hating Nashawaty, FX is showing a bunch of recent superhero movies. On Monday, it's X2: X-Men United and Fantastic Four, on Tuesday it's Fantastic Four and Batman Begins, and on Wednesday it's Batman Begins and Hellboy.

Random other movies. Here are some of the movies on TV this week: AMC is showing WarGames today, starting at 5 PM. On Tuesday morning at 3:15, TCM is showing the awesomely titled Don't Worry, We'll Think Of A Title, a 1966 movie about a bumbling incompetent who gets mistaken for a defecting Russian cosmonaut. I'm sold. On Wednesday at 10, AMC has Species, about Gandhi facing off with a sex-hungry alien hybrid. Sci Fi is showing The Thing on Thursday at 7, which overlaps with USA's 8:30 showing of Raiders Of The Lost Ark (in case you want to remember when Indy and Marion had chemistry). And on Friday morning at 3 AM, Sci Fi is showing Momentum, about government agents chasing telekinetics. Also on Friday, at 8 PM, AMC has Escape From New York, and USA has Indiana Jones And The Temple Of Doom at 8:30 PM. On Saturday, Sci Fi is showing disaster movies, with titles like Tornado Terror, all day.

Inspiring documentary. On Sunday night, The Discovery Channel has another four hours of its mega-documentary When We Left Earth, which cover everything from the Apollo 1 disaster to Skylab to the moon landing. It starts at 9 PM and goes on until 1 AM. Here's a trailer:

Scary documentaries. There's a new Mega Disasters, all about "Volcanic Winter," on the History Channel on Tuesday at 9. Could a super-volcano cover us in so much ash we'd be stuck in a deadly ice age? (And History has reruns of The Universe and UFO Files tonight.) And there's a new MonsterQuest, about ghosts, on Wednesday night at 9. If that's not daring and inquiring enough for you, the Discovery Channel has a new documentary on Wednesday called simply, Mars: Alive? (As in, is the whole planet actually sentient, and out to get us? One can only hope.) Actually, I think it's about the Phoenix lander.

Incredible Hulk:

When the Hulk first appears (after the credits sequence that retells his origin) he's in the shadows, attacking thugs and soldiers in a Brazilian slum like a lurking monster. He says his first words: "Leave me alone." And then his tired, weathered face appears out of the shadows, and he escapes, jumping all the way to Guatemala.

Soon afterwards, Banner is back in the U.S. searching for a cure for his condition. Emil Blonsky (Tim Roth) gets only a low dose of the super-solider serum from General Ross, and becomes obsessed with seeking higher doses and more power, as his mental state begins to break down. Meanwhile, Banner discovers that trusting "Mr. Blue," aka Sam Sterns, wasn't the best decision. (Sterns is supposedly helping to cure Banner, but is destined to become The Leader, the Hulk's arch-enemy. He also helps Blonsky get a bigger dose of serum, turning him into the Abomination.)

The 20 minute fight between the Hulk and Blonsky's Abomination is unbelievably awesome, but at its core The Incredible Hulk is a love story between Bruce and Betty. [Hulk Movie Blog]

Wall-E:

Here's a new scene from Wall-E that aired during Finding Nemo on ABC the other day. It includes Sigourney Weaver's computer voice, and the revelation that the robots can say stuff other than their own names.

Heroes:

Those Heroes set pics we showed the other day, of Ali Larter dressed as a sex worker, were not actually Ali Larter after all. Unless they were her stunt double or something. Here are higher res pics. But are these still from the filming of Heroes? Unclear. [WENN via Superhiro]]

The Middleman:

The Middleman doesn't know whom he works for or where his instructions come from in the ABC Family show, says creator Javier Grillo-Marxuach. And the core of the show is the relationship between the Middleman and Wendy, with the central conflict being that the Middleman is the archetypal father-knows-best square-jawed hero, who actually does know best. He was a Navy Seal, who decided not to use profanity and to drink milk, and then he found this job with no gray areas that allows him to be a straight-edge superhero in an Eisenhower suit. [Media BLVD]

Lost:

Some more Lost spoilers: Nobody knows what Sawyer whispered to Kate on the helicopter, and it's a mystery for later. The fact that the official "Oceanic Six" story includes Boone, Libby and Charlie having survived the crash at first (before dying later on) means maybe we'll see the Six meeting with their families. And maybe we'll see more flashbacks featuring those three characters. We'll see Sawyer, Jin, Locke and company on the island all through next season. We may see a little bit of Claire, who is "off with Christian," but it's just that she won't be a regular character again until season six. [E! Online via The ODI]

Dollhouse:

Here are a few new promo pics from Dollhouse, Joss Whedon's show about mind-wiped programmable agents for hire. [Sci Fi Cool]

And another new review of the pilot script says star Eliza Dushku starts out playing a character who's very similar to Faith, the iconic vampire slayer she played in creator Joss Whedon's old show Buffy. And then in the next scene, Dushku has a personality shift, and is suddenly playing someone totally different. But every time the "Actives" are programmed with a new personality, they keep a little bit of their own core personalities, and you can sort of see them develop as characters each time.

And that clip we showed before? When Dusku's Echo talks to FBI agent Paul Ballard (Tahmoh Penikett) about looking for her missing sister? It turns out that Dushku has just been "programmed" by the Dollhouse to think she's looking for a missing sister. But her real programming, under the searching-for-sister programming, is to assassinate Paul. [Youcan'tdownloadit via Whedonesque]

Battlestar Galactica:

The "Space" trailer for Friday's new BSG episode includes some startling new footage. [Battlestar Blog]

Also, you won't be surprised to find out there's some "friction" between the newly returned President Roslin and "President" Lee Adama. And also between Lee and his dad. We'll see Starbuck and Apollo paired up a bit more in the second half of the season (in 2009.) There's a big story coming up that will answer all your questions about Dualla. Oh, and last week, Lee was totally manipulating Romo Lampkin to get the presidency, at least subconsciously (or subtextually). [Zap2It]

Doctor Who:

Digital Spy is once again circulating eight real spoilers, and two "red herrings," for next Saturday's Doctor Who episode, "Midnight." As always, it's obnoxious, but here they are anyway:

• A sinister shadow poses a threat to the Crusader 50 vessel, according to a crew member.
• Betty Boop is seen doing the do in front of The Doctor.
• A Professor is carrying a hidden bomb strapped under his jumper along with a unique ultimatum.
• The Doctor toasts the Lost Moon of Poosh.
• It's Election Day on the planet Midnight, prompting The Doctor to discuss Arcadia.
• Rose Tyler trades places with a pop singer.
• Fans of a certain French phrase will be happy.
• The Doctor tries to force a pi into the mouth of an alien.
• One of the characters tells the Time Lord: "Oh Doctor, you're so handsome." He agrees.
• A famous poem by Christina Rossetti is analysed by The Doctor and one other character, in reference to ongoing events.

The Dark Knight:

Here's a new featurette about the Imax filming in The Dark Knight, which includes some new footage of Harvey Dent playing with his psychotic good/evil coin. (A lot of it is stuff you've seen before, but there's a few new bits.) [Comcast via Slashfilm]

Incredible Hulk:

Some early Incredible Hulk reviews are up at Ain't It Cool News, with a few random spoilers. Jokes include Bruce and Betty misusing a Spanish word and (unless I misunderstood) the phrase "You wouldn't like me when I'm hungry!"

The Hulk (voiced by Lou Ferrigno) actually says "Hulk smash!" The Hulk realizes at some point towards the end of the movie that he can control his inner beast and not become totally evil like the Abomination, the film's other big green guy. And yeah, Tony Stark turns up towards the end and says, "We're putting together a team." [Ain't It Cool News]

Fringe:

Here are some pics of Fringe, J.J. Abrams' new weird-science-conspiracy show, that I don't think we've posted before. [Daemon's TV]

Smallville:

Some more casting news for Smallville season eight. Green Arrow/Oliver Queen will be a series regular this time around, and storylines will focus on who he is and where he comes from. And there's more confirmation that Lana will be in six or seven episodes next season. [E! Online]

Doctor Who:

Doctor Who's annual "Doctor-lite" episode, where star David Tennant takes a week off, is actually sounding pretty intriguing this year. Here's the official synopsis: "Donna's entire world collapses, but there's no sign of the Doctor, as Russell T Davies's Bafta Award-winning time-travelling drama continues. Instead, she finds help from a mysterious blonde woman – a traveller from a parallel universe. But, as Donna and Rose Tyler combine forces, are they too late to save the whole of creation from the approaching darkness?" [Spoiler TV]

Spectacular Spider-Man:

The studio sent us some more promo pics from Spectacular Spider-Man, showing how the alien black costume starts taking over Spidey gradually — you can see the costume's pattern change from the traditional webbed background with a smaller white spider to a bigger spider with no webs. And then here's also a better quality pic of Venom.

Chuck:

It looks like Bryce, Chuck's ex-friend who stuck him with the spy directory in his brain, is back in the third episode of the new season. Bryce comes to Chuck, Sarah and Casey, asking for help to get a decrypted microchip from a man named Von Hayes, before the evil Fulcrum can get their hands on it. Bryce and Sarah go undercover at a party thrown by Von Hayes, making Chuck so jealous he almost blows his cover as a waiter at the party. Sarah gets put out of commission, but Chuck brokers a deal for the microchip — but things don't entirely go to plan.

Meanwhile, Buy-Rite has a new manager, Emmett, who's an "efficiency expert" from corporate HQ. And Lester has newfound upper management skills, which he uses to force Morgan to take on an unpleasant task — getting the guys from the SportsJocks store to stop using the home theater room as their personal frat house. But the lead SportsJock disses Anna, and all bets are off. [Chuck TV]

Get Smart:

Here's a new Get Smart trailer, that includes a ton of awesome new footage, including a weird Kim Jong-Il joke. I'm already starting to forget there was ever a movie with "Almighty" in the title.

Transformers 2:

Some guy (who was hanging around at 4:00 AM looking for info) got some details of the Transformers filming: there are some new Transformers, including a red Acura NSX, a grey and black Audi RS6, and an old Chinese ice-cream truck that splits into two Autobots. (Really. An ice-cream truck double-Autobot.) There's a scene where a Hummer in a military convoy gets flipped over, and a firefight ensues. In another scene, Megan Fox and Tyrese get chased up the stairs that run along the steel plant's blast furnace. [Seibertron]

Incredible Hulk:

Another new Incredible Hulk TV spot was airing on the Sci Fi Channel today. Among the bits that I think are new: A very stoned guy describes the Hulk, and maybe coins his name for the first time. Liv Tyler's Betty seems a tad whiny. We get to hear the Abomination talk. And the Hulk does his trademark super-destructive handclap (near the end of the clip.)

Heroes:

What would make you excited about Heroes season three? If you answered, "Ali Larter dressed as a cheap hooker," then you're the show's new target demographic. Someone caught a few seconds of footage of the show's filming, in which she's out on the street in an over-the-top outfit, and then she gets handcuffed by a man in uniform. Which of her personalities is this one, do you think? [Hollywood Bubble]

The Middleman:

Among the monsters that The Middleman and his sidekick Wendy fight are: ancient Chinese terracotta warriors, aliens, succubi and a gorilla. Wendy has a special Middleman uniform she wears to fight crime, but sometimes the call comes when she's lounging around in her leisurewear. (What are you gonna do?) Her friends start to suspect something when they see her toting a gun around. She's not your typical sidekick, and is more of a female Han Solo-type character, says actor Natalie Morales. [Slice Of Scifi]

Doctor Who:

Here's a new clip from this Saturday's Doctor Who episode. I literally found myself shouting at the screen when it ended at the worst possible moment. What do you want to bet we don't actually find out what she whispers to the Doctor on Saturday, if ever? [Ebbyzone]

Smallville:

A ton of new Smallville season eight spoilers have come out. Clark learns about a new superpower, and finds a new love interest halfway through the season, which makes Lois take another look at him. Lois will be in 13 of the season's episodes, and will be "a little catty" with a new female character. (That new villain, Tess, or someone else?) Lana may be back for six or seven episodes, which will wrap up her story arc forever. The Martian Manhunter will only be back for a couple of episodes, and we'll see the Justice League again — with three new members.

Lex won't be back at all, but producers are still hoping Michael Rosenbaum will agree to turn up in the show's final episode, so he can turn out to be the evil mastermind behind everything that's happened. Brainiac will also be back for a couple of episodes.

We'll see Martha Kent again. And Chloe will mention that she's been in touch with someone surprising. And the show will break one of its own rules towards the end of the season. [SpoilerTV]

Also, a new audition scene has turned up for Tess, that new villain who's going to play a major role in season eight. Tess is speaking with Oliver Queen aka Green Arrow, and she says she knew Lex "before," but didn't realize what bad things he'd been up to all these years. Oliver says he's sorry the state declared Lex dead. Tess doesn't believe Ollie, considering what he thought of Lex. But Ollie says he never wanted Lex dead, scumbag though he was.

Tess won't believe that the Lex she knew could be such a bad guy, but Ollie tries to convince her that the "good Lex" didn't really exist. Tess says maybe Oliver doesn't understand what it's like to get to a point where you just give up on yourself. And then she decides that actually, maybe Oliver does understand after all. She winds up asking Ollie to let her hold onto the Lex she knew. [Chocolate 84]

Fringe:

Here are a couple of new TV spots for Fringe, J.J. Abrams' new FBI/mad-science show. [Spoiler Geeks]

Past year's big summer movies usually starred Luke Skywalker archetypes, straight out of Joseph Campbell's "Hero's Journey." The young hero discovers that he (or occasionally she) has a super-heroic destiny and amazing powers. And over the course of figuring out how to wield those powers and fulfill that destiny, the young hero has to confront some father figure (like daddy Anakin) who has crapped all over his world. Part of the hero's task is to redeem the fallen father figure. "Daddy, you bastard — it's all good," that sort of thing.

In the first two Spider-Man movies, Peter Parker has some guilt of his own, over his uncle's death, but the major destructive force is a mentor gone bad: Norman Osborn or Otto Octavius. In the first Transformers, Shia LaBoeuf is almost comically innocent, and his major human antagonist is Jon Turturro, a wacky authority figure who keeps throwing his weight around and making an already delicate cars-turned-giant-robots situation worse. You rarely see the guy who personally shoulders more than his fair share of the weight of history as a summer movie's hero... until this summer, when he's starring in every movie.

The first big summer movie of the season, Iron Man, set the tone with its story of a rich white dickhead who discovers his weapons have fallen into the hands of an evil strongman in Afghanistan, and are being used to oppress the locals. I've already written about the brave choice director Jon Favreau made to graft Tony St