If you're looking for the best way to spend $250 (plus tax) in one sitting this Wednesday, then I have five words for you: Multi-Colored Kryptonite Replica Display. This weird statue of geek genius from DC Comics — packaged, according to the advertising copy, "in an upscale box" — gives you the chance to play Lex Luthor, with four different variations on Superman's least favorite rock: Red (which causes random effects), Gold (which removes superpowers), Blue (which only hurts Bizarro clones of Superman) and good old original flavor Green (which kills Superman). It also comes with a "guide to the Justice League of America Trophy Room" booklet, written by New York Times-bestselling author Brad Meltzer, which, you know, is a somewhat surreal sentence when you stop to think about it. But I think you'll agree: It may not be a comic, but this really might be the one "must have" item in comic stores tomorrow.

Then again, that title may go to Krash Bastards, a quasi-manga title from Image by Ben 10 co-creator Joe Casey and artist Axel 13. Describing the book as "a super sci-fi blast of kinetic action and widescreen adventure," Casey's story revolves around a group of hard-partying fightin' nomads and their struggle against someone that calls himself "the scourge of twelve realities." Those who enjoy violence, giant monsters and teenage rebellion may want to find themselves inexplicably drawn to this book.

Elsewhere, it's all about the collections; DC puts out the paperback version of their Infinite Crisis series, with reality-altering punches and multiple Earths fading in and out of existence.

And Marvel fights back, with a hardcover version of Onslaught Reborn, an appallingly bad, but strangely enjoyable, 1990s flashback courtesy of Heroes executive producer Jeph Loeb and controversial artist Rob Liefeld. Marvel also releases X-Men: Legacy #208, the first issue of the new status quo called "living inside of Professor Xavier's head when he's in a coma," which isn't the most expected direction, you have to admit.
That said, maybe the most eagerly-awaited book of the week is IDW's Doctor Who #1, and not only because it's weeks late by this point. IDW have become known as the sci-fi franchise haven by this point, with series based on Transformers, Star Trek and Joss Whedon's Angel under their belt, but this new series written by the TV show's script editor Gary Russell promises stories of a scale that the BBC can't quite afford just yet. Sonic screwdrivers are optional.

As always, you can check off your own shopping list here, and find out where your closest comic book store is here. Just remember to save up all your pennies and buy some kryptonite while you still can.

We can't help but feel somewhat sad for poor Marc McClure. The guy has to play the hapless dork Jimmy Olsen in several Superman movies, and then Smallville rolls around. Season after season of the show goes by, and he sees Christopher Reeve, Margot Kidder, and even the freaking voice of Terence Stamp appear in the show. More than that, they've got Superman III (shudder) star Annette O'Toole playing Martha Kent. But does poor Marc get a call? No. Finally, Season Seven. His big shot in the spotlight. Hooray! We imagine the call went something like this:

Marc? It's your agent, Morty. You'll never guess, but the Smallville folks called up today, and they want you on the show. Yes, I know! It sounds great, doesn't it? What'll you be playing? Oh, you're Dax-Ur, a sort of dorky Kryptonian who created Brainiac, a good-looking robot dude who destroys worlds! Hmm? Yes, yes, you're Kryptonian. What's that? Do you fly around and punch the crap out of people? Um, no. You've given up all of your powers and you wear a blue kryptonite bracelet... hello? Marc? Hello?

Sadly, it doesn't look like Marc will be returning to the ranks of Smallville, based on the clip below. But if you're going go, why not go in style? Having Brainiac shove his massive Terminator 2 liquid metal-style finger deep down into your neck isn't the worst. Plus he can download your brain with that same finger, which is pretty useful, and probably a fun party trick. Bizarro with his crystallizing face in one corner, and Brainiac with his phallic finger in the other. Set up a keg, and you're good for at least six hours.