Writes member "humphrey" over at WhyWeProtest:

If Scientology were pretty much exactly the same but centered around Philip K Dick, my god — I'd want in, for his secret scriptures! The lectures on cosmogony! The resonant gnostic insights that made PKD's work so mythic!

The discussion devolves into some weird irrelevant stories about strange experiences with science-fiction authors and their cult followings. But there's also a nice thread where people ask which other SF authors would have been good choices to start a religion. The main recommendations: Isaac Asimov (his religion would have had a more thought-out cosmology) and Frederik Pohl.

But I bet we can come up with some other good ones — which classic (or recent) SF authors would you prefer to see as religious founders, rather than Hubbard? [Why We Protest]

Note: Most of the stories below are anecdotal at best, and based on rumor and urban legends. Where possible, we've provided actual documentation.

L. Ron Hubbard's "start a religion" bar bet:

This one is commonly dismissed as a myth... but it's also like kudzu on the Internet. Supposedly, L. Ron Hubbard bet Robert Heinlein that he could make a ton of money by starting a fake religion. (In one version, Heinlein bet that his own invention, non-monogamy, would be more successful.) Or maybe Hubbard made the bet with Philip K. Dick. Or Arthur C. Clarke. Or George Orwell. Or John W. Campbell. No, wait - it was Ray Bradbury.

The Lewis-Tolkien time-travel wager:

Legend has it, C.S. Lewis and J.R.R. Tolkien had a bet, that they would each try writing in a new genre, to stretch both of their writing styles. Writes Bruce L. Edwards in his book C.S. Lewis:

A simple flip of a coin determined that Lewis would try his hand at a space-travel story and Tolkien would try time-travel.

As a result, Lewis wrote the space trilogy: Out Of The Silent Planet, Perelandra, and That Hideous Strength. Tolkien, on the other hand, wrote in a 1968 letter that his effort "ran dry." Writes Edwards:

Tolkien's typical method of composition led to a not surprising end: his initial attempt to write a tale of time-travel became overly complicated and burdened with detail and it was eventually left as an unfinished work. He called it The Lost Road and it was a tale of a present day English father and son who, through the son's visions and dreams, are able to travel back [through] time to meet another father and son, similar to them, who are living at the time in Middle-earth's history when the star-shaped island of Númenor is destroyed.

The Númenor tale wound up as part of Tolkien's The Silmarillion, but he never finished the actual time-travel story. So yes, Lewis won the bet.

The unnamed SF writer who wrote an intentionally bad book:

Rumors abound that a famous science fiction writer bet that he could write an intentionally terrible book and it would be a hit, because the public's taste was so bad. And indeed, the book in question was a huge hit. (This wager is supposedly mentioned in the foreword to Spider Robinson's Callahan Chronicles, but not the name of the author.)

Asimov's impossible isotope:

The Internet has lots of unsubstantiated reports about Isaac Asimov's trans-universal novel The Gods Themselves. Either Asimov wrote it in response to a dare, to write a novel "about an impossible isotope of iron." Or he wrote in response to people saying he couldn't write about aliens or sex, which is sort of like a bet. There's also the famous Asimov-Clarke treaty, where Asimov agreed to call Clarke the best science fiction writer, as long as Clarke called Asimov the best science writer.

Update: reader Jacob Kaufman says Asimov actually wrote the novella that became part of The Gods Themselves in response to Robert Silverberg saying that science fiction should be about the human dimension, not "Plutonium 186," picking a science-fictional term at random. Asimov laughed, because there's no such thing as Plutonium-186, and there can't be in this universe. But then he became intrigued and decided to write about a universe in which Plutonium-186 existed, and came into this universe as a free (but unstable) source of energy. (More details on that here.) And Asimov didn't write the book in response to people saying he never wrote about aliens or sex, but he did include those elements in the middle section, for that reason. Thanks, Jacob!

Michael Crichton's Beowulf wager:

The Jurassic Park author wrote one of his best novels, Eaters Of The Dead, in response to a wager that he couldn't write a version of the Beowulf saga and make it relevant to a modern audience. The resulting book is presented as a lost manuscript written by an Islamic envoy kidnapped by Vikings in 932.

Harlan Ellison's jazz record wager:

In 1960, Harlan Ellison was already a major up-and-coming science fiction writer, but he fancied himself a jazz expert as well. One day, he got into an argument with jazz columnist Ted White over whether a 1939 Mildred Lewis album featured backing music by John Kirby or John Lewis. Ellison was so sure of himself, he bet his entire record collection - and if he lost, he'd only collect one record from White's collection. In the end, Ellison settled the bet... at gunpoint. You can read the whole account in White's famous essay "The Bet."

James P. Hogan's win and loss:

Libertarian science fiction author James Hogan is a betting man. First, according to his own website, he wrote his first novel on a bet with a coworker that he couldn't write an SF novel and get it published. (He won five pounds that time.) But also, according to this other site, Hogan also bet that his novel, Inherit The Stars, would be better than the Arthur C. Clarke story that provided the basis for 2001: A Space Odyssey. (I'm guessing he lost that one.)

Additional reporting by Alasdair Wilkins.

The unlikely charge came from an email we received yesterday:

Just wanted to point out that the new game Dead Space has some elements that weren't advertised. Like: the plot is about space-scientologists that manage to find an alien and convince themselves that it's the god they made up.

And then you have to FIGHT the aliens because the space scientoligists wouldn't stop screwing around with them, and got it all into a scary mess.

I dislike the church of scientology, Dead Space is a good game, and it's a fun plot I haven't seen anyone mentioning on any gaming or sci fi sites.

As you might expect, this surprised us; we'd seen a lot of the pre-production of the game, as well as the game itself, and we hadn't seen any scientologists in there. So, we asked EA themselves about this take on it, and here's their official response:

Dead Space is a work of science fiction. Any coincidence to real-world people, organizations, or events is unintended.

Short and to the point... And enough to make us wonder exactly what kind of anti-Scientologist programming our original emailer has undergone to see the hand of L. Ron Hubbard where it wasn't in the first place.

In this scene, social climber Travolta welcomes a higher up from the "Home Office," whom he hopes is about to transfer him to a nicer post. I just love the horrible acting here from actors who know better, plus the incredibly cheese effects and costumes. Of course, Travolta is about to find out that he's been assigned to Earth permanently for wronging a Senator's daughter. And the humans are about to revolt. The rest of the movie is filled with zany alien antics ala Home Alone, with the humans in the Macaulay Culkin role and the aliens as the bumbling thieves. Great flick to watch with the fast-forward button close at hand and your irony-colored glasses on. [Battlefield Earth via IMDB]

Now you can read about Xenu's evil plan and his nefarious dealings with psychiatrists in this excerpt from the story's climax, below. Watch out for nuclear lava!

Apparently, Xenu was fond of dark suits. He also had dark hair and liked classical music, as well as cold drinks. He's a pretty bitter guy, and when he rounded up the people he would later bring to Earth and blow up with atomics placed inside volcanoes, he picked psychiatrists to help him weed out these undesirables. Those undesirables included "motion picture producers," as well as "writers" and "blacks." Also, "salesmen." Interesting mix.

Other interesting things of note: apparently the aliens from millions of years ago who hung out with Xenu used "felt tip pens." Makes sense. Felt-tips are pretty advanced technology. Want to know more? Check out the whole story. It's full of awesome adjectives, moody generals, and tragic esplosions. Of course, if you need the full Scientology back story, check out our handy chart.

"Revolt in the Stars" [PDF via Wikileaks — or, if you can't get that one, we are hosting our own PDF]

According to the blog, Scientologists are totally sensible:

The Bizarro World (also known as Htrae - earth spelled backwards) is a fictional planet in the DC comics universe. Introduced in the early 1960s, Htrae is a cube-shaped planet, home to Bizarro and his companions, all of whom were initially Bizarro versions of Superman, Lois Lane and their children. Later, other Bizarros were created to add to the population including Bizarro Flash, "the Yellow Lantern", Bizarro-Kltpzyxm and Batzarro, the World's Worst Detective. Everyone views the Bizarro people as strange and weird ... except THEM!

In the Bizarro world of "Htrae," society is ruled by the Bizarro Code which states "Us do opposite of all Earthly things! Us hate beauty! Us love ugliness! Is big crime to make anything perfect on Bizarro World!". In one episode, for example, a salesman is doing a brisk trade selling Bizarro bonds: "Guaranteed to lose money for you". Later, the mayor appoints Bizarro #1 to investigate a crime, "Because you are stupider than the entire Bizarro police force put together". This is intended and taken as a great compliment. And now, after just a few paragraphs of explanation, you understand precisely what Scientology is all about.

The authors of the above site are unaware of any instance in which the robot L-Ron has overtly stated that he is a Scientologist. This classification is based primarily on his name.

I just KNEW this Scientology nonsense sounded familiar [PsuedoScientology]