It's no coincidence that Prince's cousin started using heroin in the month of June, because there's just nothing on television. It was probably even worse back in 1987, before we had the Sci Fi Channel.

Monday:

The Sci Fi Channel has started showing Star Trek: The Next Generation on Monday nights, with four episodes in a row focusing on the bland life and tragic death of Tasha Yar: "The Naked Now," "The Big Goodbye," "Arsenal Of Freedom" and "Skin Of Evil."

Tuesday:

There are two episodes of Mega Disasters on the History Channel at 8 PM Tuesday night — a rerun about a possible asteroid impact on the Earth, and a new episode about a "Comet Storm." Basically if you want to spend two hours feeling total panic about stellar objects smashing into your backyard and giving us the dinosaur treatment, then it's a date. (With no president Morgan Freeman or oil-rigging Bruce Willis to distract you.)

Wednesday:

There's a new MonsterQuest on Wednesday at 9 on the History Channel. "Vampire Beast" tracks down the truth about a beast that could be more than human. Or not. Here's the description:

In the fall of 2007, residents of Bolivia, North Carolina started losing pets and farm animals to an unknown creature. Is it the same mystery predator with a taste for blood that preyed on goats and dogs in Bolivia more than 50 years ago?

The Day After Tomorrow also airs on Wednesday at 5:30 on FX.

Also, John Cho is on Last Call With Carson Daly. Will he let slip some Star Trek spoilers?

Thursday:

I'm sorry. I'm so terribly sorry. There is a Smallville rerun in which Clark's super-cousin Kara tries out for a beauty pageant, if that helps. I know, not really.

Friday:

Sci Fi Channel has the U.S. premiere of Charlie Jade, a Canadian/South African show about a detective who sees alternate universes, at 8 PM Friday. I haven't yet seen any episodes, but this site says it's very very noir, with a strong Blade Runner/Frank Miller element going on. In a nutshell, a detective named Charlie Jade (my almost-namesake) discovers that there are three different Earths: the corporate-dominated dystopia he lives on, a perfect unspoiled paradise, and "our" world. The corporate-dominated world wants to ravage the unspoiled one, and ours just gets caught in the crossfire.

And then at 9 PM, Sci Fi is showing another new (to Americans) episode of Doctor Who, "The Doctor's Daughter." Humans are stuck in an endless war against bubbly fish people, and the Doctor has a daughter. (It's not a spoiler if it's the title of the episode. I think.) It's a fun episode, but ultimately falls a bit short because it's trying to juggle too many ideas. Our recap is here. Here's a piece of the episode:

And then at 10 PM, there's a new Battlestar Galactica: "The Hub." If the spoilers we ran for this episode a while back turn out to be true, this could be a pretty explosive one that changes everything forever. In any case, we find out what happened to Roslin, and Xena is back.

Saturday:

Saturday at 10, there's a new Spectacular Spider-Man on The CW. It's called "Intervention," and it deals with the Venom symbiote, which is trying to take over Spidey. Meanwhile, Aunt May is in the hospital, and Pete's friendship with Eddie is ruined.

At exactly the same time, on the Cartoon Network, there's a new Ben 10: Alien Force, "What Are Little Girls Made Of?" Ben and Gwen discover that their grandmother is an alien. And Gwen has to make a tough decision. And at 10:30 on Cartoon, the new Transformers: Animated has an awesome title: "S.U.V.: Society Of Ultimate Villainy," which we posted spoilers from before. Here is a clip, from its earlier airing in Dubai:

Saturday night, Sci Fi has two different original TV movies: Dog Soldiers and Bloodsuckers.

Sunday:

The Discovery Channel has the first two episodes (four hours worth) of When We Left The Earth: The NASA Missions. It's a bizarre history of NASA's first 50 years, featuring new footage in HD quality. Witness the first ever spacewalk, and the hair-raising challenges of converting an intercontinental ballistic missile into a vessel capable of carrying humans up into space.

Also, the Cartoon Network has new episodes of Venture Bros. and Metalocalypse at 11:30 and midnight, as part of its "Adult Swim" lineup. The Venture Bros. episode, "The Doctor Is Sin," shows what happens when a deal with General Manhowers falls through. Dr. Venture may have to sell the Venture Compound — unless he can turn it into a super-efficient science machine. And then the Metapocalypse episode, "Dethgov," is about Nathan Explosion serving a temporary term as governor of Florida. (Thanks Lampbane!)

Tonight

Tonight sees the two-hour season premier of American Gladiators on NBC. This show is set in a bleak future dystopia where a drugged populace watches people compete in brutal events like "Rocketball" and "Vertigo," where survival is the greatest prize. Oh, wait.... never mind. If you like your contests of life and death a little more fictional, AMC is showing Terminator 2 at 8 PM.

Shia LaBoeuf is on Letterman tonight at 11:30ish, talking about Indiana Jones and explaining why he thought it was a great idea to play a "swashbuckling biker" named Mutt.

Tuesday

Shia LaBoeuf continues his TV rampage by appearing on Good Morning America, along with William Shatner.

The History Channel has two episodes of Mega Disasters at 8 and 9 PM, including a new episode, "Mega Tsunamis." Did waves taller than the Statue of Liberty smash the coasts of the Mediterranean sea 8,000 years ago — and could a tsunami like that happen again? Also, at 11 PM, the History Channel has a rerun of Earth's Black Hole, a special about black holes and whether they affect our life here on Earth. The answer, apparently, involves going to the Bermuda Triangle. (Of course it does.)

Also, FX is showing League Of Extraordinary Gentlemen at 5, and Hellboy at 8 and 10:30.

And Wednesday morning at 1:10, TMC has The Man Who Fell To Earth starring David Bowie at his absolute freakiest.

Wednesday

The History Channel comes to our rescue once again, with an episode of Modern Marvels called "Mad Electricity" — it's all about Nikola Tesla, and how we're all using his discoveries constantly today. That's at 8 PM, followed by reruns of MonsterQuest and UFO Hunters.

And at 10 PM, TMC is showing Hollow Man 2, in which Christian Slater plays a cop pursuing an invisible killer. Yeah. I didn't know they made a sequel either.

Thursday

It's the Smallville season finale, "Arctic." This could be the last time you ever see Lex and Clark face off, with the smouldering and the Lex wanting to probe Clark's secrets. After tonight's episode, Lex actor Michael Rosenbaum is leaving the show — possibly never to return — and Lana will only be back for a few episodes. Also possibly gone? Chloe. Oh, and the show's co-creators Miles Millar and Al Gough are also taking off. So even though Smallville is coming back next season, this may as well be the show's final episode because it'll be almost unrecognizable next year. So maybe we'll actually get some resolution of the show's main plot arc? It might be worth tuning in just to find out. In any case, Lex finds Clark's Fortress of Solitude and learns Clark's secrets. Anyway, it's on The CW at 8. Here's a clip:

And then Lost has the first hour of its three-hour season finale, "There's No Place Like Home Pt. 1." The survivors and the freighter people begin their final confrontation. And here's a trailer:

Also, TVLand has the 1999 movie of My Favorite Martian, starring Christopher Lloyd, at 8 PM. And TBS has the original Austin Powers at 9.

Friday

The Sarah Jane Adventures is already zooming towards the end of its first season on Sci Fi, with the second half of "Whatever Happened To Sarah Jane?" airing at 8 and the first half of "The Lost Boy" airing at 8:30. Sarah Jane gets restored to our timeline, but then her cozy little family gets broken up a different way: a family turns up claiming that her adoptive son Luke is their child. Oh, and Maria's dad finds out all about Sarah Jane's world-saving activities, and decides Maria should have no part of it. Here's a clip:

And at 9 PM, Sci Fi has the first half of a Doctor Who two parter, "The Sontaran Strategem." Some people liked this episode a lot better than I did, with the campy dancing and weird Sergey Brin knock-off. In any case, it brings the Doctor and Donna back to present-day Earth for a reunion with Martha Jones and the military organization U.N.I.T. You can read our recap of the episode here.

Battlestar Galactica has a new episode at 10 PM on Sci Fi: "Guess What's Coming To Dinner." The human survivors of the Cylon genocide reluctantly join forces with a group of rebel Cylons to destroy the crucial Resurrection Hub. And it looks like Hera has a favorite auntie. Oh, and if you're in Seattle, you can watch it with a group of fans. Here's the trailer:

Saturday

As usual, the CW has two Spectacular Spider-Man episodes starting at 9:30, including a new episode at 10. But this week's new episode is pretty special, because it features the debut of the sexiest female character from Spider-Man's comics (sorry, Mary Jane): the Black Cat. And just to up the sexiness quotient considerably, she's voiced by none other than Tricia Helfer, aka the Cylon Six on Battlestar Galactica. How much sexiness do you think you can stand at 10 AM on a Saturday morning?

And meanwhile, the Cartoon Network has another new Ben 10: Alien Force at 10: "Max Out." "The team searches for Gwen's missing brother Ken and uncovers a secret of the DNAliens invasion." And then at 10:30, there's a new Transformers: Animated, which sounds like the sort of wheel-spinning episode (sorry!) that TV shows do while they're waiting for the end of the season to shake things up: "Investigating a mysterious race car, Bumblebee gets involved with an illegal underground street racing circuit, which also captures the attention of the Decepticons." Street racing? Why would the Autobots care about street racing? Whatevs.

The Sci Fi Channel is showing all three 1980s Indiana Jones movies, starting at 4 PM. (They're also showing during the day on Sunday.) Also, at midnight, Sci Fi has Timeline, followed by Tremors 4: The Legend Begins and Prophecy: The Foresaken. (Why did it take until Tremors 4 for the legend to begin??)

Sunday

At 9 PM, Sci Fi is showing its big promo special about the new Indiana Jones movie: Mystery Of The Crystal Skulls. Apparently there really are 13 crystal skulls, of which a few have actually been found in Mexico and Central and South America. And they're a huge mystery to archeologists because they're so perfect and awesome. Not only that, but it turns out that if you assemble all 13 skulls, you can stop the world from coming to an end in 2012. (Why is Sci Fi the only channel reporting on this? You'd think CNN and C-Span would be interested in whether the world was ending in four years as well.) Anyway, it's investigative journalism at it's finest, and in no way is it just a cheesy promo stunt.

And Spike is showing Star Wars: Empire Strikes Back at 8 PM.

The San Francisco Bay Area. Let's face it: Californians love living dangerously. San Francisco was nearly wiped out in 1906 by a big shaker that registered 7.9 on the Richter scale. Fires swept through the city and pictures from afterwards resemble Hiroshima circa September, 1945. The city was rocked again in 1989 by the Loma Prieta quake. Stress is constantly building all along the San Andreas fault, so Southern California's also at risk. But the presence of the Hayward fault in Berkeley, just across the bay from San Francisco makes the place a time bomb waiting to go off: a 2002 study by the USGS said there's a 62% chance of a magnitude 6.7 or greater quake in the region between 2003 and 2032.

The Cascadia subduction zone, better known as coastal Oregon, Washington State, and Vancouver Island. Cascadia makes the San Andreas look like a pair of maracas. Recent work from seismologist Chris Goldfinger and company at Oregon State University shows that Cascadia has unleashed hell to the tune of 15 quakes of magnitude 8.0 or greater over the last 3000 years. Eight of those probably exceeded 9.0, making them among the most powerful known. The average time between earthquakes is around 220 years, but the last time the fault slipped was 1700, when a 9.0 quake sent a 5-meter high tsunami rippling onto the shores of Japan. In short, look out Pacific Rim: you're overdue.

Mentawai Islands, Indonesia. Everyone knows Indonesia is a tough place to live when it comes to earthquakes and tsunamis (at left you can see Banda Aceh before and after the recent tsunami), but unless you're watching the ticker it's hard to fathom just how bad things are. Back in December, earthquake expert Danny Natawidjaja of the Indonesian Institute of Sciences dropped some knowledge on the rest of the geo-community at the annual Fall meeting of the American Geophysical Union. Not only had there been addition an 8.4 quake in September of 2007, but a major section of the fault was still locked, and had the potential to shake the Earth even harder than the 2004 monster that caused the Indian Ocean tsunami.

He had no idea how right he was. Between February 25 and March 3 of this year (that's one week, for those keep score at home) there were five earthquakes greater than magnitude 6.5. The section of fault Natawidjaja was talking about in December still hasn't popped.

Note: If you want to participate in Quake Catcher, but don't have a laptop with an accelerometer built in: For desktops, QCN has built a USB key with the appropriate hardware, and Ars Technica is teasing us with the possibility of Wii and iPhone-based detection.

Source: University of California, Riverside

Photos: Water Encyclopedia (San Andreas), National Archives (1906 image), Telegraph.co.uk (Banda Aceh)