Angel Heart is dark urban fantasy at its most chicken-slaughteringly great. A hot, young Mickey Rourke plays detective Harry Angel, hired by a seriously Satanized Robert De Niro to find an elusive figure named Johnny Favourite. The more he hunts for Favourite, the creepier things get. De Niro luridly eats a hard boiled egg in front of him, and then he gets involved with a young voodoo priestess (Lisa Bonet) whose mother liked to drink blood with Favourite.

The movie is basically soaked in terrible stereotypes of everybody, from the "savage voodoo" types to the "ladies who like forced sex" types. Plus De Niro's hair in a bun. And there's a twist ending that is the sort of thing the demon spawn of Fritz Leiber and Philip K. Dick would scribble out in a darkened brothel basement while mainlining bug powder.

I could have shown you so many great scenes in this flick, but I decided what you really needed this weekend was a chance to see the Full Mickey in action with his voodoo lady. First they're just having sex, but then suddenly there's like blood, and scary feet, and scarier candles, and a horrifying washing lady, utterly terrifying elevators, and (gasp) orgies!!! Plus, seriously bad sex with Mickey. Iron Man could never top this.

Angel Heart via IMDB

He Looks Like An Old-School He-Man Action Figure
We can't be the only people who thought that, right? I mean, look:

We don't care how popular Transformers may be; we're not buying the idea that 1980s toys are a suitable design model for movies from now on. What's next? Black Widow will look like Jem? What a truly outrageous idea.

What's With The Highlights In His Hair?
Not since Johnny Depp's Captain Jack Sparrow has one man's hair looked so unconvincingly unkempt, so professionally teased and tinted in an attempt to seem scraggly and abandoned. It's the weirdly glossy, showbiz shorthand for a dangerous badass - he's too busy being deadly to wash his hair! - that just feels too lazy, and too cliched, to be coming from the same people who brought us the fresh, funny and, let's face it, stylish, Iron Man. And don't get us started on that facial hair, either. Robert Downey Jr. can pull it off. Mickey Rourke? Not exactly. Get a haircut and a shave, hippie.

There Is Absolutely Nothing Threatening About The Way He Looks At All
Let's face it, Rourke looks more like he's just about to fall over than about to kick your ass in that photo. And why not? It's got to be hard to walk around with massive metal electrical whips trailing out from your arms. I get what they were trying to get at with the look - that it's a jury-rigged design based on the same technology as the Iron Man suit, but slightly more homemade - but... it looks so homemade that it's come from the Transmorphers version of the movie instead of the real thing. He just looks like a schlubby guy with a torch strapped to a chest. Don't get me wrong, I knew that we couldn't just have guys in suits of armor fighting in every movie, but still: How's Tony Stark going to even break a sweat dealing with this guy?

Are we overreacting in hoping that this is a pic of some mid-movie, unfinished look for the villain, or some kind of foiler pic that'll be revealed to be fake when the movie's released next year? We hope so - but this wouldn't be the first time that a sequel has turned out to be as sucky as the original. Prove us wrong, Jon Favreau!

The curvy actress has signed on to play the dangerous Black Widow in the next Iron Man movie. Scarjo in a slinky skin-tight fighting suit, that's a beautiful thought. Scarjo, with a fake Russian accent....hmmmm, not so sure about that. Either way, I'll see it - for some reason, her eyes have some sort of weird spell over me.

And Mickey Rourke has finally come to an agreement with Marvel, and will be busting out the cybernetic whips to fight Tony in the sequel as Whiplash. Just the idea of seeing a nunchaku/whip wielding Rourke, buzzing around on a jet disc, fills my heart with joy.

Good decisions, team Iron Man, just make sure to give RDJ the most screen time, as my heart is still dedicated to him and his awesome witticisms.

[E News and Variety]

If nothing else, the increasing to-and-fro surrounding the cast of the sequel to last year's best superhero movie (Don't groan, Dark Knight fans, you know it's true in your hearts) is becoming an unexpected black eye on the previously perfect public face of Marvel Studios, which only months ago was looking like one of the most successful independent studios in the business and unable to put a foot wrong. Perhaps we should have seen the warning signs when Terrence Howard was unceremoniously replaced by Don Cheadle, and Howard's public confusion over the move was met by somewhat dirty leaks from studio insiders, but even so; that seemed like a one-time thing at the time, instead of the start of a trend.

Since then, of course, Samuel L. Jackson has hinted that Marvel are not bringing him back to reprise his role as Nick Fury, despite Fury appearing to be central to the planned Avengers movie (especially if it's as close to Mark Millar's Ultimates comic as has been rumored) because of a breakdown in negotiations over money. Just over a week later, Variety announces that the studio has offered Mickey Rourke a stunningly low $250,000 to play one of the two lead villains in Iron Man 2... a move that led, earlier this week, to Rourke saying that he wouldn't be doing the movie after all (The usual anonymous sources are saying that the deal isn't necessarily dead just yet).

Marvel, of course, haven't officially commented on any of these situations - and it's unlikely that they will, particularly as the Rourke and Jackson negotiations are still, officially at least, ongoing - but the fact remains that Iron Man 2 is beginning to look like a movie that's being hamstrung by accountants with their eyes staring a little too intently on the bottom line. This isn't exactly news - director and co-writer Jon Favreau has also complained about being lowballed by the studio in their initial offer to sign him for the sequel - but at this point, it's getting embarrassing for Marvel; the only actor who's not complained about the progress of the movie has been Robert Downey Jr. himself (Gwyneth Paltrow has griped about not having seen a script yet, and the production seems to be having trouble keeping the love interest that they cast... but at least neither of those are money-related).

We're still a year away from the release of the movie - Iron Man 2 is scheduled to open May next year (Although, let's face it, that date may end up being as unrealistic as Favreau publicly declared it when it was first announced) - but that doesn't change the fact that Marvel needs to either start coughing up some more money for this movie - and considering the first made close to $600 million, that shouldn't be too much of a struggle - or else start putting together a more convincing PR push to explain that everything's going to be alright in the end. Because, right now, it's not looking as if Tony Stark's second outing is going to be quite as bulletproof as his first.

First director Jon Favreau complains that Marvel was dragging its feet on the Iron Man 2 funding, which we wrote off as just Favreau being Favreau. Then they cut Terrence Howard loose as Iron Man's buddy Rhodey and we thought... well Howard is talented and crazy, so there must be some underlying reason. After that, Marvel started talking about ditching Samuel L. Jackson as Nick Fury, possibly over money issues. And now, they offer Mickey Rourke, who would by all accounts make a pretty awesome Crimson Dynamo, a measly $250,000.

Why is this happening? Rourke could be days away from walking away with an Oscar for his role in The Wrestler, and after the Golden Globe win, he's back on the scene. He deserves better. Sure, maybe the Crimson Dynamo has a small part in the next sequel, but why would there be so much leaked hype around this baddie in that case? Plus Dynamo should be in the entire movie — every scene, if possible.

Either Marvel is having major money troubles, or they're trying to make a blockbuster movie on a shoestring budget, which means it will probably look like hell in the end. Come on, Marvel — let's throw a few bones Iron Man's way, he deserves it. After all Tony Stark made you over $500 million across the globe. [Variety]

The trades are powering up the speculation, regarding Jon Favreau’s next Iron Man installation. Rumors have it Mickey Rourke is on board to play the Crimson Dynamo (which has been reported as a character in supposed casting calls). Which would mean get ready to see Rourke power armor clad beating the crap out of Iron Man.

The Hollywood Reporter says they've heard rumors that Rourke could also be up for the role of Whiplash, but many entertainment sites are standing by the Dynamo reporting.

Sam Rockwell is rumored to be portraying Justin Hammer, the bazillionaire rival of Tony Stark. Similar to Stark, Hammer is a genius and has his fingers in hundreds of gadgety pies. So he's smart, rich and well equipped, just like Tony, but he makes his money from criminals.

[Variety]