Someone claims to have a detailed synopsis of Batman: The Dark Knight. Batman and D.A. Harvey Dent are making headway against crime, but weirdos in Batman costumes keep showing up at crime scenes and dying. Batman goes to Hong Kong to capture accountant with a huge pot of Gotham mob money.

Then the Joker turns up, threatening to kill tons of people if Batman doesn't unmask. The Joker kidnaps Dent and his girlfriend Rachel (who also has a thing for Bruce Wayne). Batman ends up saving Dent, even though he'd rather save Rachel, and the Joker sets fire to the police station. Dent goes on a crazy killing spree.

The Joker tries to take over Gotham, blowing up the city's main hospital and threatening the mayor. People flee the city in boats, and the Joker tries to blow them up. Meanwhile, Dent almost kills Commissioner Gordon, whom he blames for Rachel's death. Batman stops Dent, who apparently dies, but not really. And then Batman (why?) decides to take the blame for Dent's murders so the city's D.A. can die with an unsullied reputation. The whole thing sounds a bit iffy, but could have a few grains of truth in there. [BadTaste]

Meanwhile, Cloverfield includes "flashbacks" to Rob's relationship with Beth (the woman he has to go back for when the monster injures her.) This happens because the handheld camera footage is taping over earlier recordings of Rob and Beth together, and occasionally we get a few snippets of leftover Rob/Beth nookie when the camera shuts down and restarts. [IESB]

Cloverfield's monster is a confused "baby" who's been underwater for thousands of years, but there's not much explanation of his origins. The monster scratches his back against a building to remove a layer of "horrifying, dog-sized" crab-like parasites, which move incredibly quickly and wreak havoc throughout the city. [Slashfilm]

More spoiler snippets:

In one corner, you have Director Darren Lynn Bousman's independent effort with Lionsgate, Repo! The Genetic Opera. Weighing in on the studio side is Repossession Mambo from Universal. While Repo! stars Paul Sorvino and Paris Hilton, Mambo has Jude Law and Forest Whitaker. Both are about people who pay for body organs on credit, and then find out what happens when they can't pay the bills. So long new set of lungs!

To make things even more bizarre, Bousman blogged that they are sharing post-production facilities with Repossession Mambo. Talk about being able to see what the enemy is up to. He remains steadfast that his film will trump Mambo, and points out they "We really did start this Opera shit!" He seems to have a valid argument as well, since he'd already shot a short version of Repo! in 2006, and used it to pitch the feature to studios. Plus his movie has singing and dancing and... Paris Hilton.

One of these is a dramatic movie, and the other one looks like a Rocky Horror Picture Show for a new generation. We'll let you decide which is which.

Every so often two films come down the pipeline with the same basic plot and smash into each other. Once the dust settles, a winner is declared, and the loser slinks into bargain bins and late-night showings on cable TV. This gave us such memorable box office battles as Armageddon vs. Deep Impact, Volcano vs. Dante's Peak, A Bug's Life vs. Antz, and Transformers vs. Transmorphers.

Repo! vs. Repo Hits The Editing Room [Bloody Disgusting]