<![CDATA[io9: slusho]]> http://tags.lifehacker.com/assets/base/img/thumbs140x140/io9.com.png <![CDATA[io9: slusho]]> http://io9.com/tag/slusho http://io9.com/tag/slusho <![CDATA[Walter Bishop Falls Victim To Viral Marketing]]> What's that our beloved scientist is slurping on, whilst filming for J.J. Abrams' Fringe? Yup it's a Slusho. J.J. Abrams' viral-marketing infection leaves no stone unturned. [Smokeinthecity via Cloverfield Clues]

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<![CDATA[J.J. Abrams: Genius Or Hack?]]> Here's the most awesome moment from Mission Impossible III, where Tom Cruise improvises a homemade defibrillator to deactivate the bomb in his brain, while teaching his fiancee how to shoot a gun. Since J.J. Abrams wrote and directed this instant classic, he's become one of science fiction's major creators, directing the new Star Trek movie, producing Cloverfield , and creating Lost and his new show Fringe. But is he a brilliant auteur, or just a great huckster who knows how to keep people guessing? Click through to find out.

Once we've seen Abrams' Star Trek and his new X-Files revamp show Fringe, we'll have a much better idea of whether Abrams really is brilliant — or just a clever hack. But already, there's plenty of evidence for both sides of the argument. Here's our list of reasons to believe either point of view:

Genius:

- Cloverfield. Once you got past the hype, it really was a great ride, and the nihilistic ending was sort of awesome in a Blake's 7-y way. For once, the fact that everything's a mystery didn't seem to matter, because the mystery was just in the background. In the foreground, you had this you-are-there spectacle of the city falling into ruins and Rob struggling to find Beth despite the pointlessness of it all.

- Lost. It's another thing we won't really be able to evaluate yet, because a lot depends on how well it ends, and how much sense it actually makes in the end. But last week's time-travel episode recharged our faith in the versatility of the concept. When the show works, it's intense and Hobbesian. The whole flash-forward tapestry storyline thing has the makings of a compulsive DVD rewatch.

- Mission Impossible III. Okay, so the make-your-own-defibrillator thing was sort of wack. And what the heck was the rabbit's foot that Tom Cruise has to find anyway? But considering this was a movie starring Tom Cruise, with "III" in the title, it was way better than we had any right to expect. It was sort of a goofy extended episode of Alias.

He hires geniuses. This is probably the best argument for J.J. Abrams being a genius — he recognizes genius in others and hires appropriately. Case in point: Drew Goddard, the Buffy scribe who now writes for Lost and also wrote Cloverfield. Another case in point: Brian K. Vaughn, another Lost writer who also created Y: The Last Man.

Hack:

- All the viral marketing. During the long Lost hiatus, we were bombarded with "clues" on viral sites, where you could track down a phone number that led to another web site that led to a riddle. Did any of it add up to anything in the end? Meanwhile, Cloverfield was two movies: the stark masterpiece you saw in the theater, and the over-complicated version all the online fans were privy to, with all the clues about Tagruato and Slusho! and news reports in Spanish.

- Armageddon. Abrams co-wrote the script of this Michael Bay splode-fest. I watched it recently, and it's just as nonsensical and bizarre as I'd remembered... but much slower moving.

- Alias. It was a fun show at first, but after a while all the daddy issues (and then mommy issues) and the endlessly spiraling "everything you know is wrong" plots started to give us a headache.

- Forever Young. I pretty much covered this one yesterday. But the treacly plot, with the nonsensical motivations — why would being in suspended animation make his girlfriend's supposedly impending death easier to handle? — is pretty hard to take. The film pretty much slides into the ick zone the moment two cute kids revive Mel in the present day. And then there's the fact that he starts to age rapidly, as a side effect of cryogenic suspension. Wha huh?

- Just the fact that he's so prolific. Besides Lost, Fringe and Trek, he's got a show about cancer patients, a show about a notary, and Cloverfield 2 on his plate.

So is he a genius or a hack? Decide for yourself, and then vote in our poll.

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<![CDATA[Secrets of the SNAFU Behind the Name "Cloverfield"]]> Director Matt Reeves dropped the news that the name Cloverfield came about entirely by accident, almost like playing a game of telephone.

Reeves says:

When we started the project there was going to be an announcement in the trades. In this case, they wanted to keep everything under wraps. So the movie was going to be made under this outside corporation that was basically a property of Paramount. That corporation had a name that I don't know the name of. I think Clover was the first part of it. Maybe it was Cloverdale. When Drew [Goddard, LOST writer] was putting a name to the project, there was supposed to be a name for the project like there was for The Manhattan Project. So he said, "I am going to use that weird mysterious thing," and he misheard it. He didn't even understand that it wasn't Cloverfield, it was Cloverdale. Maybe that was because of the street by J.J.'s old office, but the truth is he just misunderstood it.
Just like Nome, Alaska, eh? Not that it changes the story much, and he still doesn't tell us anything about the Slusho connection, dammit.]]>
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<![CDATA[Slusho! Promo Is Piss-Poor Copy Of Real Japanese Ads]]> http://io9.com/assets/resources/2007/12/slasho-thumb.jpgThe Japanese Slusho! commercial (to promote January's Cloverfield) is boring compared to Serenity's classic Fruity Oaty Bars ad, says John Brownlee at SciFi Scanner. Not only that, but you can find a zillion real ads on Japanese TV that are more surreal and wacky than the Slusho! ad. Honestly, isn't everybody already sick of the Slusho! viral marketing already? [SciFi Scanner]

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<![CDATA[Patton Oswalt Compares 'Star Wars' To Ballsacks]]> Famous indie comedian/comic book writer/video game talent Patton Oswalt is known for his love of science fiction and most other things from Planet Geek. We caught his show last week in Los Angeles where he spouted off about his fantasies of murdering George Lucas for making the Star Wars prequels. Check out the highlights after the break, and realize you'll never think of Angelina Jolie the same way again. Heroes fanwank bonus points: yes, that's a Slusho! t-shirt he's wearing.

Here is Oswalt on Lucas:

I want to kill George Lucas with a shovel. Okay, let me clarify, I don't want to kill him now because he adopted some kids and he's got that beard to take care of, but I want to go back to 1992 and just beat him to death with a shovel. Star Wars is fucking awesome, but I just want to prevent the prequels, that's all I want to do. Let's imagine I just ran into him in 1992:

"Oh my god! You're George Lucas! I just want to say you're amazing, I love you! Star Wars is awesome. Just.. thank you."

"Well, you say you like Star Wars? You know I'm about to start working on some prequels."

"Wait, you mean, you're gonna do Chapters One through Three? Oh my god! YES! I've been waiting so long for this!"

"So, do you like Darth Vader?"

"Do I like Darth Vader? Oh god I LOVE Darth Vader! With the cape and the mask and the lightsaber? He's a badass!"

"Well, in the first movie you get to see him as a little kid."

"I... what? Wait, you mean he's like Damien in the Omen, right? He's going around killing people with his mind and stuff right?"

"Well, no he's just a little kid and he gets taken away from his mommy and he's very sad."

"Yeah, well...I kind of like the helmet and the cape and the sword, you know?"

"Well don't worry about that because guess who's in the second movie? Boba Fett!"

"Holy shit! Boba Fett?! That's even better than Darth! With the suit of armor and that helmet and the cool ship? He's a badass bounty hunter!"

"Yeah, and in the second movie, you get to see him as a little kid!"

"Wait.. what? So you mean he's got the helmet on and he's shooting people and stuff, right?"

"No, he's just a little kid and his daddy dies and he's very sad."

"Oh. Well, I kind of just like where he's a bounty hunter and he's shooting people and stuff."

"Well, don't worry about any of that because guess what's in the third movie... the Death Star!"

"Oh my fucking god, the Dea... wait a minute. What is it doing?"

"Well, it's just being built and Darth Vader is looking at it."

"I kind of just like it when it's done and it's blowing up planets and stuff. I don't really care how they put the air conditioning and the toilets in, you know?"

"You seem very sad."

"Yes, you're right. I don't give a fuck about any of that stuff. That sounds... horrible! I would never go see that."

"Would you like a dish of ice cream?"

"Why, yes I would l like some ice cream. That would be very nice!"

"Well here's a big sack of rock salt!"

"What? You said I'd be getting ice cream?"

"Well, when you add the cream and sugar and ice and do a little mixing and then presto, you have ice cream!"

"I DON'T GIVE A SHIT WHERE THE STUFF I LOVE COMES FROM! I JUST LOVE THE STUFF I LOVE! Hey, do you love Angelina Jolie? Does she give you a big boner? Well then here's Jon Voight's ballsack! That's right! The sweaty, pink ballsack she swam out of. Now jerk off to that, you lucky so and so!"

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<![CDATA[ When a former cultural phenomenon jumps...]]> When a former cultural phenomenon jumps on the bandwagon of a current cultural phenomenon, does that mean that the current phenomenon has become a former phenomenon? That's the admittedly convoluted question raised by the fact that Cloverfield's Slusho teaser product showed up on this week's Heroes. Does that mean that Heroes has something to do with a giant monster coming to destroy New York City, or just that pop has started to eat itself a little too quickly for comfort? You be the judge. [Cloverfield Clues]

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