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San Francisco, 7:00 AM
Wed Nov 25
23 posts in the last 24 hours

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  • posts about #theonion more →

    Alternate Histories Collide In Onion Nazi Piece

    Why Supervillains Hate Global Warming

    Despite What The Papers Say, Moon Landing Genuine

    How to Write a Science Fiction Novel, Onion-Style

    Why Does The President Hate DragonTanks?

    Oh, If Only The Onion Ran TV Networks

    President Obama Vetoes Mutant Registration Act

    Obama Depressed, Distant Since 'Battlestar Galactica' Series Finale

    Onion Imitates Middleman?

    Vote For The Greatest Non-Human President Of The U.S.A.!
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    Dsmvwl  Admin  Promote to frontpage Approve user Ban user ×
    Image of twophrasebark twophrasebark
    11/10/09

    In reply to Alternate Histories Collide In Onion Nazi Piece
    That is creepy. A little too creepy. #theonion
     Reply
    twophrasebark was starred twophrasebark was unstarred
    Image of tande04 tande04
    11/10/09

    In reply to Alternate Histories Collide In Onion Nazi Piece
    The Leonhardt Riefenstahl part was a nice touch.

    Wonder if people call him Lenny for short? #theonion
     Reply
    tande04 was starred tande04 was unstarred
    Image of cletar cletar
    11/09/09

    In reply to Alternate Histories Collide In Onion Nazi Piece
    I don't care what ubersturbanunterfuhrer Ron Moore says, the third season of Battlestar Gleichschaltung stunk. The Robosemites didn't have a plan at all. The business about the Schluss Fünf didn't make any sense, either. And c'mon---Verärgerte Frau was a Robosemite all along? What a load of übel riechend.

    The Künstliches jüdisches Mensch-Maschinen effects were good, though.
     Reply
    Edited by cletar at 11/09/09 9:01 PM cletar was starred cletar was unstarred
    Image of Ghost_in_the_Machine Ghost_in_the_Machine
    11/09/09

    In reply to Alternate Histories Collide In Onion Nazi Piece
    Now I'm wondering what their version of Stargate shows are like. Stargate: Lebensraum?
     Reply
    Edited by Ghost_in_the_Machine at 11/09/09 5:51 PM Ghost_in_the_Machine was starred Ghost_in_the_Machine was unstarred
    Image of senatormayer senatormayer
    11/09/09

    @Ghost_in_the_Machine: It's quite obvious really. Nazi Goa'uld. Though the Goa'uld would have to be portrayed in a slightly different light. They'd be the saviors of the galaxy and weed out those impure Asgard.
     Reply
    Ghost_in_the_Machine promoted this comment Edited by senatormayer at 11/09/09 6:45 PM senatormayer was starred senatormayer was unstarred
    Image of Ghost_in_the_Machine Ghost_in_the_Machine
    11/09/09

    @senatormayer: I was thinking more like the Ancients being the original Aryans. Earth's humans are the true Aryan descendants (only the northern Europeans, of course). Everyone else (Goa'uld, Asgard etc.) is an inferior to be exploited.
     Reply
    Edited by Ghost_in_the_Machine at 11/09/09 9:06 PM Ghost_in_the_Machine was starred Ghost_in_the_Machine was unstarred
    Image of senatormayer senatormayer
    11/09/09

    @Ghost_in_the_Machine: Oh fine. I guess yours makes more sense. I really wanted to see some Goa'uld Nazis. They'd have the most whacked out spaceship pyramids you've ever seen. #theonion
     Reply
    senatormayer was starred senatormayer was unstarred
    Image of Ghost_in_the_Machine Ghost_in_the_Machine
    11/09/09

    @senatormayer: Hey, Nazi Goa'uld would still be cool. #theonion
     Reply
    Ghost_in_the_Machine was starred Ghost_in_the_Machine was unstarred
    Image of ManchuCandidate ManchuCandidate
    11/09/09

    In reply to Alternate Histories Collide In Onion Nazi Piece
    This amused me greatly, but I think that has more to do with the fact that I'm no fan of alternative histories.

    The couple of that I have attempted to read, I got the impression that the authors wished that the timelines they wrote about did actually happen.
     Reply
    Edited by ManchuCandidate at 11/09/09 5:33 PM ManchuCandidate was starred ManchuCandidate was unstarred
    Image of Jeremy Tapsell Jeremy Tapsell
    11/09/09

    In reply to Alternate Histories Collide In Onion Nazi Piece

    Woah! that Nazi ABC logo is too much!!!
     Reply
    Edited by Jeremy Tapsell at 11/09/09 5:02 PM Jeremy Tapsell was starred Jeremy Tapsell was unstarred
    Image of Jeremy Tapsell Jeremy Tapsell
    11/09/09

    @Jeremy Tapsell:
    i should point out that the logo is copyrighted by the onion and not my image, though you probably knew that, i am just saying cos i don't wanna get in trouble a haha ha ..ha?

    please don't ban me #theonion
     Reply
    Jeremy Tapsell was starred Jeremy Tapsell was unstarred
    Image of Dr.Quatermass Dr.Quatermass
    11/09/09

    In reply to Alternate Histories Collide In Onion Nazi Piece
    PKD much? #theonion
     Reply
    Dr.Quatermass was starred Dr.Quatermass was unstarred
    Image of OW-Holmes:Bringer of Fear OW-Holmes:Bringer of Fear
    11/09/09

    In reply to Alternate Histories Collide In Onion Nazi Piece
    They also read "The Grasshopper Lies Heavy". #theonion
     Reply
    OW-Holmes:Bringer of Fear was starred OW-Holmes:Bringer of Fear was unstarred
    Image of Discodave: R.O.A.C.H. M.O.T.E.L. Discodave: R.O.A.C.H. M.O.T.E.L.
    09/18/09

    In reply to Why Supervillains Hate Global Warming
    Global warming is a drawback, it must be said.

    But also: do they do an online discount? Do they have the finest cotton sheets? Do they have a 24 disposal service (and when I say disposal, I mean removal of tardy or insubordinate henchmen who've been bloodily and, sometimes, unneccesarily dismembered)? Thought not.

    Just dial 1-800-ROACH MOTEL today.
     Reply
    Discodave: R.O.A.C.H. M.O.T.E.L. was starred Discodave: R.O.A.C.H. M.O.T.E.L. was unstarred
    Image of RandomFrequentFlierDent RandomFrequentFlierDent
    09/18/09

    In reply to Why Supervillains Hate Global Warming
    Ha! That's why my lair is in my parent's basement.

    . . . oh.
     Reply
    RandomFrequentFlierDent was starred RandomFrequentFlierDent was unstarred
    Image of Bigdamnhero Bigdamnhero
    09/19/09

    @RandomFrequentFlierDent: I snorted beer out of my nose just now, because this is absolutely not true. No.

    I find the snickerdoodles Mom leaves on the dryer help me focus my eeeevil thoughts. You?
     Reply
    RandomFrequentFlierDent promoted this comment Edited by Bigdamnhero at 09/19/09 12:10 AM Bigdamnhero was starred Bigdamnhero was unstarred
    Image of RandomFrequentFlierDent RandomFrequentFlierDent
    09/19/09

    @Bigdamnhero: And I know all my super villain friends really enjoy the mini-bagel pizzas she sends down during our weekly evil meetings. It really picks you up during a late night of plotting and scheming. Now if I could just get my sister to stay out of my lab . . .
     Reply
    RandomFrequentFlierDent was starred RandomFrequentFlierDent was unstarred
    Image of My_Latest_Incarnation My_Latest_Incarnation
    09/19/09

    @RandomFrequentFlierDent: At least it's not the garage. Do you know how hard it is to plot world domination while you're squeezed into the space between a mini van and the recycling bin? Fucking hard. Especially when nobody puts the goddamn tools back where they belong. I can't fucking build a Illudium Q-36 Explosive Space Modulator without a damn Phillips-head screwdriver, okay? Would it kill you to put it back in the tool drawer where it belongs? Would it?
     Reply
    RandomFrequentFlierDent promoted this comment My_Latest_Incarnation was starred My_Latest_Incarnation was unstarred
    Image of Smeagol92055 Smeagol92055
    09/18/09

    In reply to Why Supervillains Hate Global Warming
    That's why my lair is in Dimension Z. Seriously, what do I care about global warming? As soon as one reality is worn out, I trade it in for the nearest neighboring parallel dimension.
     Reply
    Smeagol92055 was starred Smeagol92055 was unstarred
    Image of crashedpc - Haifisch crashedpc - Haifisch
    09/18/09

    In reply to Why Supervillains Hate Global Warming
    I do all my villaining from inside my head.
     Reply
    crashedpc - Haifisch was starred crashedpc - Haifisch was unstarred
    Image of geiko geiko
    09/18/09

    @crashedpc : ゴキブリ and 蟑螂 division: I'm a good guy!
     Reply
    geiko was starred geiko was unstarred
    Image of Perhaps Not Perhaps Not
    09/18/09

    @crashedpc : ゴキブリ and 蟑螂 division: I do all my villaining inside YOUR head. Mwahahahahahaha!
     Reply
    Perhaps Not was starred Perhaps Not was unstarred
    Image of Mrugby08 Mrugby08
    09/18/09

    In reply to Why Supervillains Hate Global Warming
    Everyone is volcano this and jungle that. What about one hidden under a strip club. You get a hidden base and entertainment at the same time.
     Reply
    Chip Overclock promoted this comment geiko approved this comment Mrugby08 was starred Mrugby08 was unstarred
    Image of Chip Overclock Chip Overclock
    09/18/09

    @Mrugby08: I prefer a penthouse in one of the Las Vegas mega-casinos. Plus, much larger base from which to hire evil minions.
     Reply
    Chip Overclock was starred Chip Overclock was unstarred
    Image of m_faustus m_faustus
    09/18/09

    @Chip Overclock: The perfect location for an evil lair just occurred to me. Under a prison. Maybe a bit light on the entertainment, but perfect for recruitment, and if you run is Shawshank-style you can turn a nice little profit as well.
     Reply
    Evil Tortie's Mom: R.O.A.C.H. promoted this comment m_faustus was starred m_faustus was unstarred
    Image of Evil Tortie's Mom: R.O.A.C.H. Evil Tortie's Mom: R.O.A.C.H.
    09/18/09

    @Chip Overclock: Dear Chip:

    If R.O.A.C.H. doesn't work out, can I join your evil organization? Get me unlimited buffet and daiquiri privileges, plus good A/C, and I'm there.
     Reply
    Evil Tortie's Mom: R.O.A.C.H. was starred Evil Tortie's Mom: R.O.A.C.H. was unstarred
    Image of Chip Overclock Chip Overclock
    09/19/09

    @Evil Tortie's Mom: R.O.A.C.H.: We have a health plan too, BTW. Includes dental and eye care. I'm confident we can skip the entire interview process with you, based on your profile on the Evil League of Evil's social networking site, your evil references, and your reputation in the evil industry.
     Reply
    Chip Overclock was starred Chip Overclock was unstarred
    Image of Kpibca Kpibca
    09/18/09

    In reply to Why Supervillains Hate Global Warming
    This is why I just operate from miles below the surface of New Mexico.
     Reply
    Kpibca was starred Kpibca was unstarred
    Image of Roklimber Roklimber
    09/18/09

    In reply to Why Supervillains Hate Global Warming
    That's why my secret lair is inside the Krakatoa volcano. Unfortunately, rising costs of doing mad science have forced me to rent the place, which is currently occupied by another ioniner (LittleDragon).
     Reply
    Roklimber was starred Roklimber was unstarred
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