Monday

If you didn't lose most of your Sunday to Syfy's V marathon, don't despair; they're continuing it today, from 8am through 7pm (And then again tomorrow, starting at 8am again). Jane Badler fanatics of the world, unite for one last time before Morena Baccarin takes over. Talking of remakes of beloved shows, AMC have a 15 minute Prisoner Preview at 2:45, teasing the reboot that premieres later this month (It re-runs throughout the week, if you miss it).

Of course, Monday wouldn't be Monday without Heroes; this week is the much-anticipated "Once Upon A Time In Texas" episode that sees Hiro try to save Charlie's life again, even though I thought we'd conclusively proven way back in the first season that he couldn't do that. Oh, Heroes, suddenly that House re-run on Fox at the same time seems that bit more interesting...

Tuesday

Having presumably primed yourself with the end of Syfy's V marathon, you'll be eagerly anticipating the premiere of ABC's brand new, now-with-extra-Scott-Wolf V, for the first of four weeks before a winter break. We reviewed it at Comic-Con and were pleasantly surprised by the "creepy and intriguing" update of the classic show. Here are the first eight minutes or so:

Meanwhile, AMC and FX are showing off their superhero movie chops: AMC has a doublebill of Batman and Batman Returns starting at 8, while FX shows the better-than-the-first-but-that's-not-necessarily-saying-much Fantastic Four: Rise Of The Silver Surfer at the same time.

Wednesday

Get your humpday started properly with AMC showing of the Buffy The Vampire Slayer movie at 9:45 in the morning, and then stick around for Reign of Fire - one of our favorite dragon war movies ever - at 3pm. In fact, when you add in more showings of Batman, Batman Returns and Batman Forever (at 8pm) and Batman Begins (at 10:30), you could pretty much just leave your television tuned to AMC all day.

But if you did that, you'd miss a new episode of Eastwick at 10pm on ABC. Considering I've never seen the show, I'll just quote the summary instead:

After Chad visits her one last time in a dream, a grieving Roxie resolves to fulfill his last wish — if she can figure out what it is. Hounded by Max, her replacement at the Gazette, about her kidnapping ordeal, Joanna grapples with her own lingering questions while dodging his and Kat, startled by a newfound ability, realizes that Bun's old friend Eleanor Rougement may have answers for both of them.

For those looking for documentary-esque thrills, Mythbusters investigate liquid nitrogen myths in a new episode at 9pm on the Discovery Channel, and, after rocking a marathon of Destination Truth from 8am through 3pm (There's also a new episode on at 9), Syfy celebrates the power of brand loyalty by bringing in Warehouse 13's Eddie McClintock to help track down the "Ghost Of Buffalo Bill" on a brand new episode of Ghost Hunters at 8pm.

Thursday

As if the V marathons earlier in the week weren't enough, Syfy has a Threshold marathon starting at 8am and running until 3 in the afternoon. Remember Threshold?

Because it's Thursday, it's time to give your TiVos a workout. At 8pm, you can choose between a new episode of FlashForward on ABC -

Mark, Demetri, Gough and MI6 agent Fiona Banks investigate a Blue Hand club and its possible connection to some recent suicides. Meanwhile, Aaron receives a surprise visit from a former army buddy of his late daughter's, Demetri comes clean with Zoey about his lack of a flashforward, and Nicole helps Bryce uncover the mystery of his flashforward while volunteering at the hospital.

- or a new Vampire Diaries on the CW:

On his birthday, Stefan is surprised by a visit from Lexi, one of his oldest friends. Still upset by the events at the Halloween haunted house, Elena does her best to stay away from Stefan, but Lexi gives her some unsolicited relationship advice. Elena and Jenna are surprised by a change in Jeremy's behavior. At Damon's insistence, Caroline tries to get his medallion back from Bonnie. Finally, Damon's offer to help Sheriff Forbes has sudden and tragic results.

Similarly, 9pm brings a choice between Fringe on Fox -

The Fringe Division takes on a puzzling investigation where victims are inexplicably disintegrating into ash. The shadowy case casts light on Special Agent Phillip Broyles' past and leads the team to the possibility of foreign Fringe Science. Emotions run high as the alarming events stack up and revealing personal details emerge about the leader of the Fringe Division.

- and what looks like a very fun episode of Supernatural on the CW:

The Trickster throws Sam and Dean into an alternate universe where they are characters in different television series, including a sexy medical show, a Japanese game show, a forensics show and a sitcom. The brothers realize the only way to get out of this world is to play along and become the characters in the shows. However, Castiel appears and warns them this universe is dangerous and they must get out before they become trapped.

(My suggestion: Watch FlashForward and Fringe live, TiVo Supernatural and try to pretend Vampire Diaries doesn't exist. Sorry, Kevin Williamson.)

Friday

Today's Syfy marathon? The third season of Doctor Who. Again, it starts at 8am: Set your TiVo to relive the awesomeness that is Martha Jones. Otherwise, you'll be left with nothing to watch until Smallville on the CW at 8 (Jor-El meets Chloe, Clark realizes that a younger version of his dad is on Earth and Zod keeps disappointing in the villain stakes).

That's followed by the Syfy double bill of Stargate Universe at 9 (Wherein Richard Dean Anderson guests with a crazy plan about how to bring the accidental crew of the Destiny home. Spoiler: It's only the sixth episode: It's not going to work), and Sanctuary at 10 (Magnus wakes up with no idea where she is, or why everything around her has been destroyed. I know how she feels).

If you're feeling like you're missing old friends, though, you could always tune in to White Collar on USA at 9, which counts Fringe's dear departed Charlie and The Middleman's Natalie Morales amongst its cast this week. Plus, of course, Matt Bomer, whom everyone keeps telling me is the new David Tennant in dreaminess quotant.

Saturday

Syfy seems to have forgotten that Halloween was the week before, with three horror movies: Open Graves (starring a pre-Dollhouse Eliza Dushku), in which American students abroad find a deadly boardgame, the remake of The Amityville Horror, and From Within, which apparently has something to do with a Christian questioning her faith when people around her get gruesomely slaughtered.

Thankfully, the movie that follows those three, Snakehead Terror features both snake-headed mutant pirhanas and Bruce Boxeleitner, so things seem to getting back to normal in the end. (Open Graves starts at 4, and each following movie comes two hours later).

Sunday

Worried about the truth behind Roland Emmerich's new destructo movie? Then don't watch 2012: Startling New Secrets on Syfy, which sounds as if it treads the fine line between Destination Truth-esque knowing parody and tacky sensationalism. Which, come to think of it, sounds pretty like the 2012 movie itself, actually... Instead, finish off your weekend with "Return To Malice," the latest, and no doubt entirely awesome, episode of The Venture Bros. on Cartoon Network at midnight. Let's face it: Brock would be disappointed if you didn't.

Monday

It's not too late to ditch work and sit through the Threshold marathon all day today on the Sci Fi Channel. Who needs paperwork when you have sexy Carla Gugino and her incredible brain to save the world from a crashed alien spaceship? Go Red Team!

The Middleman is back, showing M.M. fighting injustice and helping his twenty-something sidekick Wendy sort out her crazy life. In this episode, Wendy goes undercover as a sorority sister to investigate a haunted sorority house, which spells pillow fight! The Middleman airs at 10 PM on ABC Family.

Casper Van Dien (or, as I will always know him, Johnny Rico) will be on Chelsea Lately on E! with the rest of the Starship Troopers 3: Marauder cast at 4 PM.

The Japanese shōnen mecha anime Gurren Lagann, about an underground future society, is on twice on Monday once at 11 and again at 11:30 PM on the Sci Fi Channel.

A sad and scruffy retired cop becomes a crusader against fascism in an alternate future. New episodes of the scifi cop drama Charlie Jade air on 3 AM on the Sci Fi channel.

Movies:

In Reign Of Fire, sad humans fight dragons with the help of Christian Bale, pre-Batman voice, and Matthew McConaughey, tonight at 12:30 AM on TBS. Plus, you can almost get to the Moon by watching Apollo 13 at 2:30 on AMC. Deep Impact, the armageddon movie that time forgot, is on soon after the dragon hotness, at 2:30 AM on TBS. And lastly, who needs Star Wars when you can watch a spoof instead? ABC Family is airing Spaceballs tonight at 8 PM.

Tuesday

There's an all day Monster Quest marathon on the History Channel starting at 8 AM. Nova will bring us another inside look at "Cars Of The Future" at 12:30 AM on PBS.

An all new Eureka is coming your way on Tuesday night. The second episode of the new season is adorably called "What About Bob." Follow the sheriff as he hunts down Global Dynamics' own Creature from the Black Lagoon. Eureka airs 9 PM on the Sci Fi Channel.

Wednesday

Eliza Dushku will be on Jimmy Kimmel Live on ABC at 12 AM, and hopefully she'll spill some Dollhouse dirt.

The History Channel will delve into the infamous 70s UFO sightings for you, in UFO Files: UFOs of the 70s at 11 PM. Turns out the 1970s were the most active period of UFO sightings ever. (Who knew?)

Movies:

Wrong Turn is on Fox FX at 10 AM, in case you haven't gotten enough Eliza Dushku on Jimmy Kimmel. Watch her get lost in the woods and discover a sinister secret: the people in the mountains have mutated into crazy cannibals, and Eliza's on the menu.

Friday

From 8 AM to 4 PM, the Sci Fi Channel is running a marathon of Doctor Who in case you need to catch up on the tail end of season two.

Movies:

Follow Tom Cruise as he tries to save his ungrateful kids from attacking aliens in War Of The Worlds 8:30 on ABC 10:30 AM. Hang out with Big Red in the first Hellboy at 8 PM on Fox. Escape from a boring Friday night with Snake Plissken, in Escape From New York at 11:30 on AMC. Batman Begins is on at 8 PM (and many other times throughout the night) on Sci Fi.

Saturday

Find out why almost all the aliens we hear about are little gray men with big heads, in the UFO Files: New UFO Revelations: the Grays' Agenda, at 10 AM on the History Channel.

The space and time continuum opens up for another monster series Primeval. Follow the zoologist Professor Nick Cutter as he searches for his missing wife and tries to wrangle the occasional monster that steps out of the show's space and time rift. The creepy creature show is in its third season on the BBC, and the first season premieres on BBC America at 9 PM.

Movies:

Out Of Time airs at 4:30 PM on TNT. And there are back-to-back Flubber movies on TCM. Follow the original Absent Minded Professor as he discovers flubber, at 9 AM. Then follow up with The Son of Flubber at 10:45 AM.

Sunday

If you're up early (or late) feast your eyes on Ghost In the Shell at 4 AM on Adult Swim. Plus, the Venture Brothers will have a new episode for fans on Sunday at 11 PM at Adult Swim.

Because one person demanded it, I'm going back to the "days of the week" format for now. I reserve the right to experiment with it again at some point. And since it's the summer doldrums, I may occasionally have Wednesday's entry just be a LOLcat or something.

Monday

Pretty much the only new thing on TV this week — aside from shows that previously aired overseas — is the second episode of The Middleman, ABC Family's show about a straight-edge, milk-drinking superhero who battles the forces of suckitude. And tonight's episode (at 8) features the Terracotta warrior rampage you've heard so much about. And in case you missed the first episode (You fool!) they're showing it again at 7 PM. Here's a shiny clip!

Also tonight at 8, the Disney Channel is showing Minutemen, the original TV movie about a group of kids who develop a time machine and use it to go back and rescue other kids from social disasters. Over time, they realize that they've upset the natural order of the cosmos, because the now-disaster-free nerds are getting too big for their own britches. Oh, and there's a whole in the space-time continuum, yadda yadda. I watched this movie last time it was on, and it's just as dumb as it sounds, but sorta cute in a disturbing way. Here's a trailer:

Right now, as you read this, the Sci Fi Channel is having a daytime marathon of Threshold, the short-lived alien-invasion show from Star Trek's Brannon Braga and starring Brent "Data" Spiner. (It's also produced by Batman Begins scribe David S. Goyer.)

And tonight at 1 AM, TBS is showing Eight-Legged Freaks, the actually quite decent film about spiders terrorizing a small town.

Tuesday

Tonight at 10, the History Channel has the most thrilling-sounding episode of Mega Disasters ever, called "Glow Train Catastrophe." Tell me you wouldn't go see a band with that name, without even knowing what type of music it played. Here's the synopsis:

The U.S. Department of Energy and the Nuclear Regulatory Commission plan to transport 77,000 tons of nuclear waste to a permanent storage facility 950 feet below Nevada's Yucca Mountain. If the plan goes through, much of the cargo will travel through Las Vegas, making an accident there a very disturbing possibility. If history has taught us anything, it's that transporting dangerous goods can sometimes have catastrophic results. Take a look at the potential disaster that such a rail accident would have in Las Vegas.

If Vegas was full of radioactive mutants, would anybody notice?

Sci Fi is continuing its tribute to canceled-too-soon shows by showing a ton of episodes of John Doe, the Fox show about an amnesiac guy who knows the sum total of all human knowledge.

Wednesday

Tonight, PBS has the premiere of a new show, Nova ScienceNOW, which seems to have a sort of "magazine" format. Tonight's episode deals with new findings on dark matter, recovering your lost memories, digital forensics, and the wisdom of crowds. Check your local listings for time. Here's a podcast:

And for those of you who are unemployed, sick or working out of your homes, Encore has a double feature of Bio-Dome and RoboCop, starting at 11 AM. The contrast between the two movies should be... interesting. Meanwhile, AMC is competing by showing The Day The Earth Stood Still, followed by Species, starting at 1:30 PM.

Thursday

FX has The Mask Of Zorro at 5 PM, followed by Batman Begins at 8. Since Zorro was one of Batman's main inspirations, it would be interesting to watch them back to back and see how they present their respective heroes' backstories. Plus, Antonio Banderas and Christian Bale!

Today's daytime Sci Fi marathon covers Stargate: SG-1.

Friday

Tonight is possibly the last time the Sci Fi Channel will show South African/Canadian dimension-hopping show Charlie Jade at a reasonable hour, at 8 PM. We learn more about 01 Boxer, the only person who can jump dimensions without any help, and his mysterious conspiracy. I have to admit one sad thing about these long-canceled foreign programs appearing on Sci Fi (like Odyssey 5 last year) is that you know in advance how many episodes there will be. At least in the case of Jade, apparently, the season ends with a fairly satisfying resolution, although some questions are left dangling.

And then at 9, there's another foreign import, but one which shows no signs of going away — Doctor Who has the second part of its Steven Moffat haunted-library story. After a very cohesive first part, the story sort of scatters in many directions for part two, with Donna's storyline barely intersecting with anyone else's. Here's my writeup of the episode — many, if not most, people seemed to like it a lot better than I did. Here's a big chunk of the episode to get you warmed up:

Also this evening, AMC has Escape From New York at 8 PM and E!TV is showing the Will Smith Hollywood Story at 9. And you can see Smith in action in Men In Black, on TNT at 8.

Also, the Sci Fi Channel is showing a passel of Dark Angel episodes while you're at work.

Saturday

On the Cartoon Network at 10:30, there's a new Transformers: Animated, "Sari, No-one's Home":

When the Autobots are away fighting Blitzwing, Sari must defend the Autobots' home base from the invading Constructicons.

And here's about half the episode, thanks to an overseas airing:

Supergator airs at 7 on the Sci Fi Channel. Sorry, I sort of misled you: it has nothing to do with torts or corporate litigation of any kind. It's purely about a really, really big alligator stalking some people in Hawaii. From some of the same people who brought you Carnosaur, Mansquito, Mastodon and so many other great Sci Fi Channel original films. Here's a clip:

Sunday

Speed Racer: The Next Generation seems to be showing new episodes again on NickToons, even though TV Guide says it's a rerun. I'm pretty sure this episode, "The Fast Track part 2," has never aired before. Strange events at the Redwood Rally startle Speed, and he begins to suspect that someone is tampering with the virtual track. Then Speed and Annelise get trapped on the virtual track together. That's at 9:45 PM.

And there's a new Venture Bros. on the Cartoon Network at 11:30. It's called either "Enter The Bad Seed" or "Dr. Quymn, Medicine Woman," depending on whom you believe. And it's followed, at midnight, by a new Metalocalypse. "Nathan's attempts to date again are ruined by the band."