Larter is in talks to play Virginia Lake, the "strong but feminine" woman at the heart of the show, says Gratzner. She'd be starring opposite Joshua Jackson, who's playing pilot Paul Foster.

And the new movie is already planned as the first installment in a trilogy — the first screenplay is written, and the second and third movies exist in treatment form. The movie's aliens will still be evil organ-stealing bastards, and they'll be humanoid instead of District 9-style creatures. It sounds like a recipe for exciting G.I. Joe-style schlock, but apparently that's not the goal.

Gratzner, a veteran special-effects worker, tells Forbidden Planet:

What I want to do with UFO is what Christopher Nolan did with the Batman franchise, or Martin Campbell did with Casino Royale. UFO is not a spoof, or a parody or a kids' movie. It's a pretty dark story, actually…it is not a show for young children.

You could argue, of course, that both Batman and James Bond had a track record of being dark and tackling adult themes before those films appeared, whereas UFO has a track record of this:

Great pep talk: "You're doing a fine job — a man's job. But you don't have to do it any better just because you're a woman [in a Lady GaGa costume.] And don't forget, you're a very pretty girl." And then they make the other woman stand with her leg raised , in a silver miniskirt. When she tries to move, they're like, "Hold it right there." As she says, "Not the most flattering of pin-ups."

Anderson's first live-action science fiction series, before Space: 1999, UFO is a delightfully campy adventure show about SHADO, a secret organization that fights evil organ-harvesting aliens. The moonbase staff all wear purple wigs and shiny silver outfits, and the music is jazzay, sixties style.

On the other hand, reading between the lines of Gratzner's interview, it sounds like he really wants to make something closer to J.J. Abrams' Star Trek, keeping a lot of the concept design and silly outfits of the original, but with a smidge more character development and slightly more serious plots. But he's namechecking Batman Begins and Casino Royale because they're the gold standard for reboots right now. In any case, an Abrams-esque remake could be an attainable goal, and could actually do quite well amidst a swarm of Nolan-wannabes. Fingers crossed! [Forbidden Planet]

Jackson, who despite his Fringe smirks and long dramatic pauses will always be Pacey from Dawson's Creek to me, will play Paul Foster, a pilot who joins SHADO (Supreme Headquarters Alien Defense Organization) to combat an alien plan to harvest human body parts in the new feature version of Gerry Anderson's awesome series. The movie will be the directing debut of Iron Man's visual effects supervisor, Matthew Gratzner, and hopefully launch a new craze for purple hair, which was always one of the best things about the show.

Joshua Jackson's captain of 'UFO' [Variety]

Aircraft designer KA Kalinin designed the K-7, a massive and extremely expensive prototype plane that briefly carried passengers during 1933. However, the plane crashed in November 1933, causing the project to be scrapped before more prototypes could be built. These images imagine a battle-ready version of a plane similar to Kalinin's K-7, with enough firepower to take down another non-existent vehicle: the Nazi flying saucer.

Russian Flying Fortresses [English Russia via Metafilter]

The child reportedly crawled into his parent's experimental balloon, untied it, and took off earlier this morning. As of right now the balloon is about 40 miles North of Denver, but the aircraft was built to go higher. It's terrifying and horrible, and our hearts go out to the little boy. Let's hope the authorities figure something out.

Watch it live here.

UPDATE: The National Guard is involved and the balloon has landed, story developing. MSNBC is reporting on the live stream that authorities have not found a body inside the balloon. The child has been identified as Falcon Heene. No one is sure if he has fallen out, or if Falcon was even in the balloon from the beginning. The boy went missing this morning and hasn't been seen. His brother was the one who reported that Falcon was inside the small basket of the balloon.

[MSNBC]

I actually kind of love the Jason Of Star Command credits, for the whizzy spaceship and the friendly dragon, among other things. But it is pretty cheesetastic and insane. My favorite part: about 40 seconds in, we get a tight closeup of the evil Dragos, looking like Brian Blessed crossed with a Borg, and then it zooms out jerkily to show he's sitting with a bunch of coke-snorting lizards. And then we zip back to the tight closup on Dragos so we can learn his name. Awesome!

But that's not even the worst TV opening credits of all time. We'll save time and put that one first. The absolute weakest theme tune and opening montage almost certainly belongs to...

K-9 And Company:

The first ever Doctor Who spin-off: he's a sassy robot who likes to sing his own name! She's an alcoholic who sits around drinking! Together they, erm... get sloshed and sing off key! Yeah, that's it! Seriously, was everyone involved with this drunk the whole time?

Space Academy

A group of well scrubbed young people learn to harness their amazing abilities, guided by Dr. Smith from Lost In Space. And Peepo! Don't forget Peepo the friendly robot! This one has the best "explaining the show's premise" voiceover.

Flash Gordon

Running running running... And then smiling! Nice teeth! Warrior woman. More running! Gateway in space, and then cue the drum machines, because planets are flying at your head. Zoooom! I like that the planets get drum machines.

Ark II

The voice of Landru narrates about pollution and waste. We're in a post-apocalyptic Winnebago — check out the long lingering shot across its side, to let you know it's a stretch Winnebago. Evil, scary flower of doom! But the best part is the bumper, where the guy carefully says everyone's name into the log, while their faces and names flash on the screen. Subtle!

Pain Killer Jane

There's only one type of pain she can't kill. Can you guess what it is? Anyway, dark gloomy city, then strippers! Then explosions! Then action! Then showering. Then bra! Then more montage, showing that these people shoot each other a lot, but they also smile and nod, and share a beer in their top secret lab. Ooh, back scars!

Mission Magic

Okay, so it's more like fantasy, or maybe urban fantasy, but wow. This is the show that launched Rick Springfield's career, before he was a soap opera actor or a pop singer. The show is all about a young witch named Miss Tickle, but Springfield gets top billing. More importantly, check out the incredible psychedelic cartoon visuals:

Prey

It starts with the most boring lecture in history, full of vague stuff about "okay, so there was an advanced species, and we wiped them out, and then there's another advanced species, and now we're the prey. Except when we're not." Confused yet? Cue montage of spermatazoa and monkeys, with words like "EVOLUTION" and "SELECTION" wibbling onto the screen. Now it all makes sense!

UFO

If we end up doing a list of the best opening credits as well, this will most certainly be in there. It's easily among both the best and worst TV show openings I've ever seen. The weird typewriter exposition! The men hugging themselves and breathing deeply! The purple wigs and crazy cars! It's all just so great! And yet, terrible.

Project UFO

This one is sort of the opposite. Where UFO was kicky and jazzy, Project UFO is sort of austere, with the Jack Webb-esque voiceover and the slow, dull scrolling across unidentifiable drawings of spacecraft:

Journeyman:

We grew to love this short-lived show, but its credits were part of why we had misgivings about it in the first place. Random years are flying over the Golden Gate Bridge! Now birds are flying backwards! It's Journeyman, the man with the power to confuse birds!

Fantastic Voyage

This one is pure groove, with the Peter Gunn-esque music, and the echo-y voice reading every single thing on the screen. "CMDF! Combined Miniature Defense Force!" If we're invaded by anything miniature, they'll protect us. Authority: TOP SECRET! HIGHEST CLEARANCE! And then there's Guru, master of mysteroius powers. Yeah. This is the sort of thing that fuels a million Adult Swim shows.

Time Trax

This one makes me sad, because Time Trax holds a special place in my heart. But these credits? So bad.

Electra Woman And Dyna Girl

This is another one that's great but awful — they move so stiffly, jumping out of their flying ship. And yet they're so awesome. They fight tigers! And spiders! With lasers! They shoot Sarah Jane Smith's wine glass, so she'll dry out and stop getting drunk when the Zarbi are attacking. They're hip women of today! And they have lyrics!!

Smallville season five

The posters over at Television Without Pity singled this opening out for particular badness, and it's not hard to see why. The weird dissolve-o people, the choppy montages, the cheesy video effects, it's all just a melange of badness.

Alias season four

Here's another one the TWOPers singled out. I used to love the techno music/deep purple mystery vibe that you got from this show's credits in the first couple of seasons, but this version of the opening credits slides over into ridiculousness, with the cheesy dance music getting too overhyped and the medley of Sidney's wigs getting over the top.

Automan

He's so cute and blue and glowy, and his little glowing bug flies around harrassing women! What's not to love?

SeaQuest DSV

There's a dolphin, and it's flying around the show's logo as if it wants to play, but then it gets tangled up in a net of too many clips from the show on screen at once, and the poor thing ends up mangled and destroyed. This is why we need dolphin-safe opening credits.

Code Name: Eternity

More awesome techno music. My favorite bit is at 0:12, where the hero sort of snaps his forearm up and raises his fist, so it looks like he's dancing, and then a defiant closeup of him smashes into the camera like he's striking a pose. But the whole thing is great — the screen being sliced up into vertical chunks, the sillhouette of a guy standing in front of his own wobbly face, the seasickness-inducing zooms. Rockage!

Dollhouse

I wrestled with including this one, because Dollhouse really is a fantastic show in general, and I hate to criticize any aspect of it. And Jonatha Brooke sang a couple of my favorite songs of all time. But these credits? Not doing the show any favors. Whenever you try to get people to take this show seriously, they watch these credits and start giggling. The "la la la la" sounds unfortunately lobotomized, and Eliza Duskhu's magic power is changing outfits as she walks. Also, "Active Secure" as she does yoga — what? It's like a computer scanner is monitoring her yoga progress. Uh, no.

Logan's Run:

They're torturing the dolphin from the Seaquest DSV credits to make those "Chew! Chew! Chew!" noises.

Star Trek: Enterprise.

Both Deep Space Nine and Voyager had similar opening credits: the treacly instrumental music, the slow montage of spacey scenes, the terrible empty dullness. But at least they felt sort of epic. The Trek behemoth tried to set a change of pace, with this schlocky ballad from Diane Warren, writer of timeless gems by Michael Bolton, Mariah Carey, Chicago, Heart and many others. (Plus "I Don't Wanna Miss A Thing" by Aerosmith.) And they paired it with a totally cheesy video. Result: awesomeness! Here's the revised, boppier version:

The Invisible Man (1970s version)

It's the love boat, except with an invisible David McCallum. The way it zooms out when the effervescent Melinda Fee tosses her dice - like she's throwing the camera - is just special. And then there's just too much excitement, so the screen has to split into four cubes of awesome.

Voyagers!

They're being flung at the camera through space again and again! This may actually be the best example of the "explaining the show's premise in the credits" phenomenon, especially with the lost Osmond brother talking us through the whole "red is for temporal wrongness" thing. Zippee!

Crusade

What is your name? What is your quest? What is the wingspan velocity of an unladen sparrow? If you can answer these questions, you'll love these opening credits:

The Phoenix

He's sort of writhing in ecstasy a lot of the time as he strokes his medallion — either that or staring into the camera with a crazed exuberance, like he wants to stick his tongue through our TV tube and lick our eyeballs. But we're viewing the whole thing through a flaming triangle, so it all holds together surprisingly well.

The Powers Of Mathew Star

He's a space prince! And he plays football. But mostly, we have Louis Gossett Jr. explaining the whole deal, and having Louis Gossett Jr. talking about how special you are is probably actually better than being an alien prince with super powers anyway.

Future Cop

Oh, Ernest Borgnine. He just loves to confuse his African American partner, with the help of his wacky android cop from the future. When Borgnine laughs, it's actually really scary - and that's the signal to launch into the 1970s action disco music. And funny pixelated graphics. Whee!

Time Cop

The greatest movie of all time (well, almost) spawns a really sad set of TV credits, with footage of the time-travel train interspersed with vertical wedges of the same bit of footage three or four times at once - because the time-travel train splits the world into simultaneous chunks of sameness! Don't you get it? People who we don't care about are talking, and all we want to see is someone policing. In time!

Star Cops

Another one that makes me sad - Star Cops is a vastly underrated show, a classic from the pen of Chris Boucher (Doctor Who, Blake's 7) but wow - this theme tune is horrible, sounding like Spandau Ballet had a horrible mishap. And the Earth gets squished and turned into a boot sole... why?

Fantastic Journey

Another one with the screen divided up into squares, this time of different sizes... there's a lady walking, and we zoom in on a cat! The cat looks really bored — I can haz glowy portal? Oh, and Roddy McDowell is an android, or just a flasher.

Dark Angel

"In a broken world, she is haunted by her past..." The worst thing that happened to opening credits in the 1990s was that technique that lets you have five different versions of someone's face blending into a swirly of awful, all at once. This is a particularly bad example of the multi-face overload:

Man From Atlantis

It feels like he's swimming around, half naked, for several minutes before he finally breaks the surface and we go into the traditional montage of people having Personalities.

Earth: The Final Conflict

Aaaaa it's Enya! I stumbled on this one, when I was searching for the season two credits of Andromeda, which have the overly caffeinated voiceover talking about how Dylan Hunt is the guardian of a dead civilization protecting the galaxy from everything. But this is almost as good:

Well, first off, it looks as though people in the early 1990s mostly saw UFOs in major metropolitan areas — although it looks like there were a lot in Hull. Also — and this might just be obsessive fandom speaking –- but doesn't it look like there's a correlation between the number of UFO sightings per year, and the popularity of homegrown science fiction classic Doctor Who? You'll notice the sightings drop off almost completely after Who gets canceled in the late 1980s.

Head over to the Guardian for the nifty interactive version of the map. [Guardian]

We already know that Syfy is working on reboots for both Alien Nation and Quantum Leap, but why stop there? There are some fine dearly departed shows out there that could easily serve as the network's chance to get back into the space opera genre. Here're some of our picks - and why we think they could work.

UFO


What's that, you say? You don't think UFO is space operatic enough? Well, if you just duplicated the original series - where the secret organization SHADO worked to prevent alien invaders from harvesting human organs without anyone knowing - we'd agree... but what if you took the battle back to the aliens in addition to keeping the intergalactic Cold War going on Earth? We're seeing something not unlike Torchwood: Children of Earth mixed with BSG's silent space battles in our heads, a gritty, political take on the alien invasion idea... and we like it.

Blake's 7


Escaped convicts fighting for freedom against a fascistic government in the distant outer space future? There's nothing about the concept behind Terry Nation's 1970s BBC series that doesn't scream win, and as a plus for Syfy, the British Sky network is already working on a revival so they don't have to do everything from scratch. The potential for political allegory illustrated with impressive special effects rivals Galactica at its best, if done right, and there'd be less outcry from fans of the original - This one was always downbeat and depressing.

Farscape


Yes, we know that people have gotten mad when we suggested remaking Farscape before, and to them - and to those keeping the dream alive with the current Farscape comics - we'll suggest this: How about we don't reboot the series entirely, but relaunch it and find a new focus without undoing everything that's come before? If nothing else, that's got to be better than waiting for the perennially-forthcoming webisode sequels, right?

Lost In Space


It's a classic for a reason, people. Don't let memories of William Hurt and Matt LeBlanc put you off, Lost In Space is ready for a revival. What other show offers the chance for family drama, fantastic aliens and cowardly scientists hamming it up on a weekly basis? Take the Buffy route of using genre staples as metaphors for familiar problems, add a generous helping of humor, and voila: A Space Opera for all the family. Hell, just get Josh Friedman onboard as showrunner and you'll be set.

Star Trek


When you think of Space Opera TV, you can't help but think of Trek... and with the success of the new movie relaunching the franchise, and Bryan Fuller (under contract to Syfy's parent company NBC/Universal to come up with new shows) constantly talking about his desire to create a new Trek TV show, it almost seems like fate. TrekMovie even made the case for Syfy launching a new Trek, leading the network's Craig Engler to respond "A good, new, affordable Trek would be great on Syfy." Take note of "affordable," though; as we've pointed out before, the rights issues involved alone may make this idea financially a bad idea.

What do you think? Would you watch any of the above, or are you aghast at the very idea of yet another remake? Use the poll below to let us know just how wrong we are.

CinemaSpy speculated with production illustrator Eric Chu (known for his work on the BSG reboot) as to how he would redesign and update the series. One idea is to strip down the "cheese" of the 70s and infuse the work with a gritty and dark reality... because space life is hard.

Here are a few images that Chu dreamed up. What do you think about a slightly darker but still purple-haired franchise? Chu is the expert on gritty space opera by now so we can assume, should they go down this path, this might be a fair representation of what awaits us all.

Check out the rest of the speculative art at CinemaSpy.

In an interview with Den of Geek, Anderson acknowledged he had been contacted by the new film's American producers and that he has high hopes this will lead to him having a role in the film's production:

"I got a call from somebody in America. It was very kind actually - they phoned to say, 'Gerry, listen, there's an announcement going out now [about the new movie] and we didn't want it to come as a shock to you', which was a kind move. As a result of that I had a long chat with them. It wouldn't help me to blow this up bigger than it is, but I have a feeling that I might end up being a consultant on the movie."

This marks something of a change from the last time one of Anderson's shows got the Hollywood treatment. The makers of the utterly disastrous 2004 movie Thunderbirds had initially invited Anderson on as a creative consultant, but let him go days later when they decided they already had enough people on the payroll. Anderson has previously described the Thunderbirds movie as "the biggest load of crap I have ever seen in my life", which sounds about right.

Despite this previous bad experience, Anderson is cautiously optimistic that UFO will be different from the mostly awful Hollywood remakes of classic British shows, Thunderbirds very much included:

"Over here there's a rather unfortunate history about remakes; Thunderbirds the film was a disaster, and The Avengers, and so on. But I hope, and I think I probably believe, that this could be the exception."

The UFO movie is currently still in the development stages. The original series is available on DVD and heartily recommended.

[Den of Geek]

1. John Anderton, Minority Report

The Setup:

In the year 2054, John Anderton is the chief of Washington DC's elite precrime unit, which uses three psychics to predict when murders will occur and thus prevent them. Arrested for a murder he actually did sort of commit (which is way rarer than it sounds), Anderton is placed in suspended animation in the Precrime holding cells. The case seemingly closed, his longtime mentor Lamar Burgess goes to comfort Anderton's estranged wife Lara, but accidentally lets slip a crucial detail that suggests he knows far more than he is letting on.

Lara, finally believing John's claims of a deeper conspiracy, goes to free him from his cell. It's then full speed ahead to the film's conclusion, where Anderton confronts Burgess and places him in a no-win situation, where the only way to save his beloved Precrime will mean destroying it forever. Burgess kills himself rather than face such a prospect, and Precrime reforms itself, setting free everyone it was holding captive. But did Anderton ever actually get released from his cell, or was this all just a fantasy he created?

The Case For:

Somewhat unusually for a project rooted in a Philip K. Dick short story, Minority Report isn't particularly interested in the nature of reality, at least not in the way we're talking about here. Instead, most of the film concerns itself with debating predetermination versus free will, which is a different philosophical question from whether or not the events we experience are real. As such, it doesn't really make much thematic sense, and there's only the flimsiest of circumstantial evidence to suggest Anderton fantasized the whole thing.

Besides, this is Steven Spielberg we're talking about, not David Cronenberg (but more on him in a little bit). It just isn't really his style to reject the reality of his own films. If anything, Spielberg's fantasy and science fiction oeuvre is defined by accepting everything as real, no matter how preposterous.

The Case Against:

Still, that really is an impossibly easy ending. After spending a solid ninety minutes doing nothing but running and hiding from the implacable Precrime officers, the escaped John Anderton has no trouble leaving their facility or breaking into the impressively ritzy social event Burgess is at. Everything just falls into place a bit too neatly, considering pretty much nothing came easy for the first two-thirds of the film. Perhaps the end of Minority Report is a bit like the end of Adaptation - its sheer implausibility is the biggest clue that it isn't exactly happening the way you see it.

Chances That It Really Happened:

90%. A lot of recent Spielberg films have had somewhat weak conclusions, including Munich, War of the Worlds, and Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull, and you don't see anybody claiming those endings didn't happen. Well, plenty of people prefer to believe Kingdom of the Crystal Skull never happened at all, but that's a different issue.

2. Bender, Futurama

The Setup:

In the episode "Obsoletely Fabulous", Bender is sent back to the factory to receive an upgrade that will make him compatible with the new Robot 1-X. Unwilling to go through the painful, personality-altering upgrade, Bender goes on the run, eventually winding up on an island full of obsolete robots. Forsaking his own technological nature, Bender downgrades himself, replacing his metal parts with wood.

After launching an attack on civilization, Bender and his primitive cohorts end up at the Planet Express building, where they manage to do far more harm than even Bender really intended. All of his friends trapped in a raging inferno, a now useless Bender is forced to call upon the aid of Robot 1-X, finally making him realize the new robot has his uses. At that point, he snaps back to the factory, where he is informed the whole thing was just a hallucination, his robotic mind's way of coming to terms with and accepting Robot 1-X. This forces Bender to ask the philosophical question:

If that stuff wasn't real, how can I be sure anything is real? Is it not possible, nay probable, that my whole life is just a product of my or someone else's imagination?

It's a valid question - is any of Futurama real?

The Case For:

Absolutely, yes, all of it is real. By which I of course mean no, none of it is. Much as I'm sure it pains all of us to admit it, Futurama is just a TV show. So, technically speaking, I suppose none of it is actually real. But that's not what we're dealing with here. Much as Bender's line represents a great bit of meta humor, it isn't really meant to call into question whether the "actual" events of Futurama are any less real than any other TV show in the same way that, say, the "Normal Again" episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer did. Am I the only one who's horribly confused by all of this? If nothing else, I need to find some more synonyms for "real."

The Case Against:

The end of the episode finds Bender walking back into the slums of New New York City, which he chooses to see as a beautiful meadow full of friendly woodland creatures. Beyond the fact that that sort of seems like an odd choice for Bender's perfect world, Bender's newfound belief that "reality is what you make of it" really does suggest that, on some metaphysical level, Futurama is all just some idle fantasy.

Chances That Futurama Really Happened:

90%. In the end, you've got to trust in the robot technician's brusque response to Bender's philosophical query: "No, get out. Next!" A man that coolly competent probably has a pretty good handle on the ways of the universe. Now, as to whether Leela ever really recovered from the space bee sting, well...that's another matter entirely.

3. Ed Straker, UFO

The Setup:

In, "Mindbender", one of the best episodes of this British cult classic about an elite but underfunded paramilitary force fighting mysterious aliens (which I've already waxed lyrical about in a previous post), SHADO recovers a bizarre artifact from the surface of the Moon. All those who touch it experience ultra-realistic hallucinations. After two men are killed because they started shooting at fellow SHADO personnel, thinking they were the enemy, Commander Ed Straker takes possession of the strange object.

It isn't long before Straker hallucinates as well, as a heated argument with General Henderson is interrupted with a director yelling, "Cut!" Utterly confused, Straker finds himself on a television set filming a TV show that looks an awful lot like UFO. He wanders around the studio, stumbling into a theater showing previously shot footage. Straker watches in horror as he sees some of the most traumatic moments of his life - all moments previously shown in the series itself - up on the screen as mere entertainment.

Unable to cope with this strange new world, Straker rushes back to his office set and desperately tries to make it return to normal. To his great relief, everything finally snaps back to normal, and he is once again Commander Ed Straker. But still...did he actually stumble upon reality, however briefly?

The Case For:

This is the same fundamental problem we faced when grappling with Futurama. What's the difference between a show acknowledging the fact that it's a TV show and a show suggesting everything we see is an illusion? I guess it's all a matter of degree, and the more and more elements from real life the show draws upon, the harder it is to dismiss the idea that the TV show is really just a TV show.

For instance, one of Straker's costars joins him in the theater to watch the raw footage. On UFO, the character was Colonel Paul Foster, but here he introduces himself as Mike. The actor who played Foster? Michael Billington. It's little details like this that suggest "Mindbender" really was trying to push Straker's hallucination as close to the actual production of UFO as it possibly could. At a certain point, doesn't the false version of reality get close enough that you might as well consider it the real thing?

The Case Against:

Then again, there are plenty of elements that don't match up with the actual behind the scenes of UFO. "Mindbender" would have been much more, well, mindbending if they had given the actor who played Ed Straker the same name as the man who really portrayed him. Considering that was Ed Bishop, they even could have had some somewhat amusing gags over the fact they shared the same first name.

Instead, Straker's actor name is Howard Beale, who was also an actor that, in his cover job as a movie executive, Straker had had to reprimand earlier in the episode. Much as the episode does some truly crazy, fourth wall shattering stuff for something made in 1971, there aren't nearly enough dualities for this to perfectly mirror the real making of the show, and as such it's hard not to conclude it is just a hallucination after all.

Chances That UFO Really Was All An Illusion:

15%. I'd be a lot more conflicted if they'd just been a little more meta. Although Straker's reaction to seeing his entirely life as a TV show really is heartbreaking.

4. The Red Dwarf crew, Red Dwarf

The Setup:

In the series five finale "Back to Reality", the crew find themselves under attack from a giant squid. Facing certain death, they suddenly awaken in a virtual reality gaming center. There, they are told they've spent the last four years playing a total immersion video game, and not playing it particularly well either. Returning to their miserable lives in a fascist state, the four friends aren't completely sure they can face their newfound existences and prepare to commit suicide together.

Luckily, they don't have to, as the ship's computer Holly is able to pull them back from the brink of despair. As it turns out, that squid that was attacking them had release a hallucinogenic toxin that caused them to experience the same hopeless fantasy as a group. The squid's effects disrupted, they are able to escape and resume their adventures. But is the world of Red Dwarf any less illusory than that of the fascist state?

The Case For:

The idea that they actually were playing a video game for four years doesn't really hold up to any serious scrutiny. Kryten alone is deeply problematic, as he didn't appear until the start of series two, when he looked and sounded vastly different (because a different actor played him), and it wasn't until the third series when he became a regular. I mean, I suppose the total immersion game could have had an entire part where one character plays housekeeper on a dead ship for the first year, especially if the players were doing a really terrible job, but it doesn't make a lot of sense.

Anyway, it's not even like UFO, which retained some slight ambiguity in that Straker didn't suddenly snap out his hallucination - he instead had to return to his office and actively choose to return. The Red Dwarf crew doesn't go back to the VR machines; indeed, we actually see them back in the real world for a few seconds before they realize where they are, as they continue to act like they're stuck in the fascist world. That's pretty conclusive visual evidence.

The Case Against:

Still, the possibility that Red Dwarf is just a slightly malfunctioning virtual reality simulation might be one way to explain all the massive, inexplicable changes to the show's continuity. For instance, the show quietly moved the characters' home century from the 21st to the 23rd, and Christine Kochanski somehow morphed from Lister's secret obsession (played by C.P. Grogan) to his ex-girlfriend (played by Chloe Arnett). Even if the despair squid simply created things that weren't there, it might well be possible that they simply returned to another layer of the game. After all, I've heard the levels of immersion involved are pretty total.

Chances That They Really Did Go Back To Reality:

65%. At a certain point not long after this episode, the show sort of stopped existing for me anyway.

5. Sam Lowry, Brazil

The Setup:

Mild-mannered bureaucrat Sam Lowry discovers love thanks to a clerical error, and his single-minded pursuit of what is quite literally the girl of his dreams makes him an unintentional enemy of the state. About to be tortured by his best friend Jack Lint (played by Michael Palin, in one of the all-time great underrated performances), Sam is suddenly rescued by domestic terrorist and freelance air conditioning repairman Harry Tuttle. Lowry and Tuttle proceed to blow up the Ministry of Information, but then things get a bit weird (to say the least). Sam ultimately escapes with his beloved Jill, and the two can now live happily ever after. But did any of it actually happen?

The Case For:

Completely depends on which version of Brazil you saw. Terry Gilliam's cinematic bad luck is the stuff of legend, and he faced studio interference on Brazil from the very start. Unwilling to accept Gilliam's bleak ending, Universal chairman Sid Sheinberg took his grim 142-minute version and cut it down to a breezy 94 minutes, complete with a happy ending where Sam does indeed go off to live in peace with Jill. This so-called "Love Conquers All" version appears on the Criterion release of Brazil, and was once shown in syndication on TV because its much shorter running length made it easier to market.

The Case Against:

Well, you see, the biggest thing missing from the "Love Conquers All" cut is a final scene between Jack Lint and the Deputy Minister of Information, Mr. Helpmann. The two look sadly at Sam, still strapped to the torture chair, and remark that he is "gone" - incurably insane. In other words, any legitimate version of Brazil ends with it completely clear that the happy ending is a product of Sam's broken mind. Which, considering all the crazy things that happen during his escape, is really the only plausible explanation anyway.

Chances That He Really Escaped:

5%, if only as a slight nod to the power of television syndication.

6. Allegra Geller and Ted Pikul, eXistenZ

The Setup:

Legendary game designer Allegra Geller has to go on the run with her de facto bodyguard Ted Pikul when an assassin shows up at a focus group for her new fully immersive masterpiece eXistenZ. The pair jump into an exponentially more bizarre adventure where it becomes impossible to know for certain what's in the real world and what's just the game. Finally, Geller realizes Pikul is the real assassin and kills him, only to find herself awaking as a member of the focus group for the actual game TranscendenZ, programmed by the actual legendary designer Yevgeny Nourish. The entire movie up to that point had all been a game, or so it would seem.

Allegra and Ted are seemingly content with their gaming experience, but then they pull Yevgeny aside to ask him whether he should pay for all the harm he has done and will do to the human race. They then shoot kill him and the head of the focus group in front of a stunned crowd of their fellow testers. They then prepare to kill another tester, who is forced to ask: "Hey, tell me the truth - are we still in the game?" So how about it? Did they ever make it back to reality?

The Case For:

Ooh boy. Let's see now. Well, there's the fact that a lot of the actors in the film only use their real accents in the final scene. That might be taken as a clue that the focus group for TranscendenZ is real, if only in the sense that the characters now actually sound like real people. Look, I honestly have no idea whether anything in eXistenZ is real or imaginary, but I do know one thing: Christopher Eccleston's American accent is the fakest thing in cinematic history.

The Case Against:

It just would seem to fundamentally go against director David Cronenberg's brutally ironic, unsparing sensibilities for the characters to ever escape the game. In fact, I think it's debatable whether there even is such a thing as "the real world" in eXistenZ, and even more debatable whether it makes much of a difference. Honestly, I'm pretty sure the question of whether they're in the real world or not is the least important part of eXistenZ.

And just so we're clear - yes, this argument has come down to a metaphysical quandary on the one hand and the ninth Doctor's terrible accent on the other. Just as it should be.

Chances That They Really Got Back To Reality:

I'm not sure. I guess you'd have to define reality first.

UFO isn't as well-known today as some of Gerry Anderson's other shows, such as the Supermarionation series Thunderbirds (otherwise known as what Trey Parker and Matt Stone were parodying in Team America: Wold Police) or Space: 1999 (which, for all its lofty intentions, might be the one show that can outdo the original Battlestar Galactica when it comes to space opera cheesiness).

But, despite its dated 1970's style - let's just say bell-bottoms were heavily featured and leave it at that - UFO was probably the best of the bunch, offering an uncompromising look at a desperately underfunded paramilitary organization as it attempted to defend Earth against an alien threat it barely understood. This organization was SHADO, or Supreme Headquarters Alien Defense Organization, led by Commander Ed Straker. Straker's cold, calculating character made him an unlikely hero, but it also provided the show with much of its dramatic heft, as his singleminded pursuit of the enemy left him ever more isolated from his friends and family.

The show also had the standard Gerry Anderson assortment of cool vehicles and equipment, including a Moonbase - infamously staffed by sexy young women whose uniforms consisted of sparkly silver catsuits and purple wigs - and a submarine that launched a fighter jet. I'd attempt to explain further, but the opening sequence does a much better job of setting up the premise (it's also unspeakably groovy):

Though the show admittedly got off to a bumpy start, with some poorly paced, woodenly acted early episodes (considering most of the creative team had spent the previous decade working with puppets, that's not entirely surprising), UFO quickly developed into an exciting mix of action and drama. Its last nine episodes, made after a forced months-long production break, represent the show in top form and is some of the best science fiction ever made for British television.

So that's the original show, which I heartily recommend checking out. But what about this new movie? Not much is yet known, although it will retain the original's near-future setting. The TV show was made in 1970 but was set in 1980, and the movie features a similar decade-long gap, as it will take place in 2020.

Joseph Kanarek and Ryan Gaudet are currently writing the screenplay. UFO will be their first screenwriting credit. The film is being produced by Avi Haas and Henri M. Kessler as well as super-producer Robert Evans, who used to be famous for being behind the likes of Chinatown and The Godfather but is now mostly famous just for being super-producer Robert Evans.

Admittedly, this isn't quite the dream team I'd want handling a personal favorite like UFO, but I'm going to remain optimistic. The show's dark tone, uncertain enemy, and complicated characters arguably make it a fit far better with the science fiction of today (like Battlestar Galactica) than it ever did with the lighter shows of the 70s (like, well...Battlestar Galactica). UFO was ahead of its time, but its time might just be right now.

[Sci Fi Wire]

Monday:

Chuck -
When you mess with Scott Bakula (Chuck's on screen dad), you're in for a heap of trouble. Our nerdtastic hero has to dig all the way back into his personal life and pull Jordana Brewster out of jail to save his father. Chuck is on NBC at 8 PM.

Chuck Promo:

Chuck Promo:

Heroes -
We continue on down Angela's rickety memory trip to meet her sister, while her bratty kids argue about baseball and whom mommy loved more. Heroes is on NBC at 9 PM.

Heroes Promo:

Heroes Clip:

Tuesday:

Fringe -
What has the body of a lion and claws of an eagle? Whatever it is, Walter made it - and Charlie now has to fight it. Fringe is on Fox at 9 PM.

Fringe Promo-

Reaper -
Sam and Morgan are under strict orders from the Devil to spend more time together. Plus all the other dudes teach us how to seduce demon girlfriends, using shower coffee. Reaper is on the CW at 8 PM.

Reaper Clip:

Reaper Promo:

Cupid -
Cupid gets political when the Earth-bound god has to match up a liberal lady with a right winged fella, because what are we, if not ridiculous stereotypes pigeon-holed into easy plot hurdles? Cupid is on ABC at 10 PM.

Movies:
Learn all about the Monster that Challenged the World, on TCM at 3:15 PM. And develop a fear of evil mollusks that travel through California's efficient waterways and terrorize the residents.

Wednesday:

Better Off Ted -
Linda "accidentally" takes uppers and Veronica tries to help Rose with her school fundraiser, but we all know why we're tuning in again... Phil and Lem. Better Off Ted is on ABC at 8:30 PM.

Lost -
LIke it or not, it's a Miles-centric episode, where the writers trick us into thinking that we'll find out why or how he talks to dead people. I don't believe it for a second, but the curiosity is piqued. Now bring Daniel back, or I'm going to throw a tantrum. Lost is on ABC at 9 PM.

Lost Promo:

Lost Promo:

Time Warp -
I will never get tired of examining anything in extreme slow motion, especially flipping kitties (see below). This week, Time Warp slows down a medieval catapult, rockets and stick fights. Check it out on the Discovery Channel at 8 PM.

Time Warp Promo

Mythbusters -
Part of Discovery Channel's "Alaska Week," the boys head North and test out how a V-shaped snowplough can avoid injury by splitting in half after a collision. Check out all the Alaska-themed goodies on the Discovery Channel at 9 PM.

No new UFO Hunters.

Thursday:

No new Smallville.

No new Supernatural.

Movies:

My biggest guilty pleasure, Titan A.E is on Cinemax at 2 PM. It takes place a thousand years in the future where Drew Barrymore and Matt Damon battle killer aliens (who blew up Earth) and attempt to unify humanity. There are space angels, energy aliens, blind aliens, a jaded main character and rock music.

Jennifer Garner freaks out about being a 13-year-old trapped in a 30-year-old's body. FX is showing 13 Going On 30 at 8 PM - no doubt to promote 17 Again, the Zac Efron backwards aging flick, which is kind of the same thing.

Friday:

No new Dollhouse.

Movies:

Debbie Reynolds stars as a witchy old grandma who is eager for her grand kid to leave the normal world and come to Halloween Town to attend Witch U. How have I not heard about this? It's like Harry Potter for idiots. The THIRD movie in this Disney franchise will be on at 9 PM. Here is the trailer for the first one - I can't find the third as I assume it's too evil even for youtube. I'm buying the DVDs right now.

Not looking for family-friendly bad movies, but still want a laugh? White Noise 2 (you know, the movie where they talk to ghosts through static - no, not Poltergeist, the sequel to the bastardized version with smoke people and Michael Keaton) is on TNT at 12 AM.

But if you'd rather have your eyes burned out in a different manner you could always watch Star Wars Episode 1 and 2 on Spike TV at 9 PM and 12 AM.

Saturday:

Kings -
So Kings has been moved to Saturday and it's up to us to keep it alive and kicking. So stay in and flip on your TV. This week, Macaulay Culkin stars as the creepy little doll faced nephew-to-the-King who was cast out on NBC at 8 PM.

Kings Promo:

Movies:

The Syfy Channel movie War Of The Worlds 2: The Next Wave premieres tonight. Words kind of fail how ridiculous this looks. Why make it War of The Worlds at all - why not Yet Another Alien Invasion,? But if they kill that annoying teen in this sequel, who had no business surviving in the Tom Cruise version, then I will change my stance entirely. The movie is on at 8 PM on the Syfy Channel.

Sunday:

Movies:

Get twice the Arnold Schwarzenegger for your buck, in the futuristic 6th Day flick on TMCe at 8 PM.

Spike is debuting Robert Englund and Jenna Jameson's Zombie Strippers at 10 PM. Lap dances and brains for us all!

The fantastic, Stan Winston directed, creature feature Pumpkinhead is on IFC at 11:45 PM. Join Lance Henriksen as he avenges the death of his son, with a giant pumpkinheaded demon. If you fancy yourself a monster fan, you must see this movie - preferably in a dark and dingy basement that smells like mold.

Unfortunately for UFO conspiracy buffs, the sunshine that's falling on Area 51 sounds like more of the same obfuscation and cover-up stuff that we've been hearing for decades.

Four Area 51 employees spoke to the Los Angeles Times today about their work during the 1960s. These were:

Colonel Hugh "Slip" Slater, 87, commander of the Area 51 base in the 1960s. Edward Lovick, 90 . . . spent three decades radar testing some of the world's most famous aircraft (including the U-2, the A-12 OXCART and the F-117). Kenneth Collins, 80, a CIA experimental test pilot, was given the silver star. Thornton "T.D." Barnes, 72, was an Area 51 special-projects engineer. And Harry Martin, 77, was one of the men in charge of the base's half-million-gallon monthly supply of spy-plane fuels

These men discuss how OXCART, a MACH-3 spy plane built by Lockheed Aircraft Corporation was tested extensively at Area 51. They claim that thousands of UFO reports during that time can all be traced back to tests of OXCART.

Says the LA Times:

Since only a few Air Force officials were cleared for OXCART (even though it was a joint CIA/USAF project), many UFO sightings raised internal military alarms. Some generals believed the Russians might be sending stealth craft over American skies to incite paranoia and create widespread panic of alien invasion. Today, BLUE BOOK findings are housed in 37 cubic feet of case files at the National Archives-74,000 pages of reports. A keyword search brings up no mention of the top-secret OXCART or Area 51.

The men working on OXCART suggest that the military was "forced" to create UFO-tracking Project Bluebook to deal with UFO reports that nobody realized were OXCART. Really? I'm not a big conspiracy person, but even to my skeptical sensibilities that sounds a little half-baked.

via LA Times

Monday:

Chuck -
The dreamy Scott Bakula dons a floppy hair-don't as Chuck's washed out drunkard Pop. Together, Chuck and his blonde girlfriend convince Pops to dry out long enough to join the family wedding. But all that work goes to hell when Chevy Chase pops in as a lunatic CEO with a dark and twisted past that links directly back to Bakula. Chuck is on NBC at 8 PM.

Chuck Promo:

Chuck Clip:

Heroes -
After last week's not-terrible episode, this week's has a lot to live up to, especially since it's all about Angela. This week, we get answers to Angela's past. Meanwhile, Noah continues to have marital troubles, and Sylar continues his buddy cop journey with Danko. Heroes is on NBC at 9 PM.

Heroes Promo:

Heroes Clip:

Movies:

Possibly the creepiest, and most overlooked, movie ever — Disney's The Black Hole — is on TCM tonight at 5:45 PM. A crew discovers a spaceship on the edge of a black hole with a nasty secret and a mad Captain.

Tuesday:

Fringe -
J.J. Abrams' Scooby Gang is back, with a pale feral child who makes Walter dance. But how does this silent child relate to a creepy serial killer who's been leaving his/her victims splayed out in public squares for all to see? Fringe is on Fox at 9 PM.

Fringe Clip-

Fringe Promo-

Reaper -
It's a Reaper road trip, where Sock tries to sleep with his stepsister, and Sam almost gets eaten by a giant snake creature. You know: same old, same old. Reaper it on the CW at 8 PM.

Reaper Clip:

Reaper Promo:

Cupid -
Trevor continues on with his Cupid shtick, with Claire's friend Riley. And we all learn an important lesson about love, or something. Cupid is on ABC at 10 PM.

Wednesday:

Better Off Ted -
A glitch in the company's sensor system causes Ted to have to battle the execs' cost-cutting ways yet again. But who cares about him? Phil and Lem are back! Better Off Ted is on ABC at 8:30 PM.

Lost -
The horribly misunderstood Ben must atone for all his bad deeds, by coming face to face with the smoke monster. Will we ever find out what it is? Who knows, but Smokey is still my favorite character on the island. Lost is on ABC at 9 PM.

Lost Promo:

UFO Hunters -
Cuba and Florida teem with underwater alien bases — just ask the UFO Hunters, on the History Channel at 10 PM.

Thursday:

Catch up on your Kings from 11 PM until 3 AM with a mini marathon, over at the Syfy Channel.

No new Smallville.

No new Supernatural.

Movies:

Aliens are disguised as creepy little infants in this 90s remake of the classic 1960 film, Village of the Damned. That's at 2 AM on Cinemax.

Friday:

Terminator: The Sarah Connor Chronicles -
It's a face-to-metal-face confrontation. Weaver finally gets the business meeting of a lifetime, tonight in the season finale. That's on Fox at 8 PM.

TSCC Promo

Dollhouse -
The House team figures out that an intelligence leak is coming from inside the house! So the only thing to do is turn Sierra and Echo into super-secret spies and set them loose inside their own abode. Dollhouse is on Fox at 9 PM.

Dollhouse Promo:

Prepare to suspend your disbelief indefinitely for both parts of a movie about a massive 10.5 scale earthquake that threatens to turn the US into some version of hell, only with sushi. Apocalypse parts 1 and 2 is on USA at 10 AM.

Another good double feature is The Fly and The Fly 2, over at AMC at 2:14 AM and 4:15 AM. I'm actually more interested in seeing Fly 2 as it's all about the unfortunate fly scientist's spawn being a teen and dealing with his raging insect instincts.

Saturday:

Movies:
There's a classic SyFy channel low-budget werewolf movie — this time with a military slant because they're using werewolves as soldiers. War Wolves is on at 11 PM.

Another terrible Syfy Original, Monster Ark, alleges that before Noah built THE arc, he built another one for monsters — and one got loose and he hid it in a box in Iraq, and they find it in this movie. So that's what happened to the unicorns, check it out at 5 PM.

Sunday:

Kings -
Macaulay Culkin is finally making his grand Kings debut, and I cannot wait. He's so perfect for the evil cast-out son, it's going to be tremendous. Kings is on NBC at 8 PM.

Movies:

The worst Kevin Costner movie of them all, Waterworld, will come jet skiing your way on Encore at 8 PM.

The opening of this treasure trove of information on UFOs comes during an increase in reports of UFO sightings in England, including this one pictured above, snapped over London last week. The newly-declassified government reports cover UFOs reported between 1987 and 1993. While many of the sightings were proven to be caused by natural (or human-generated) phenomena, one incident in particular frightened the government a great deal and has never been solved.

This incident took place in 1990 over Scotland, where many witnesses spotted diamond-shaped ships [pictured] as well as military jets. According to The Telegraph:

The Ministry of Defence first became aware of the existence of the craft when the Daily Record newspaper presented it with six colour photographs of the object. The UFO seen by two men, one of whom captured it on camera, as it hovered in daylight near the A9, at Calvine, north of Pitlochry, on August 4, 1990.

The witnesses said it hovered for about 10 minutes – during which time military aircraft were also seen making a series of low-level passes – before moving upwards, out of sight, at great speed.

The files show that officials established from the photographs that the military craft were Harrier jets even though, intriguingly, none were operational in the area at the time.

An MoD minute prepared for the then Armed Forces Minister, Sir Archie Hamilton, and dated September 14, 1990 states: . . . "They [the photographs] show a large stationary, diamond-shaped object past which, it appears, a small jet aircraft is flying. The negatives have been considered by the relevant staff who have established that the jet aircraft is a Harrier (and also identified a barely visible second aircraft, again probably a Harrier) but have reached no definite conclusion regarding the large object." . . . The files show that a year after the original photographs were taken, the MoD tasked experts to produce line drawings of the UFO which would give officials an idea of scale.

Even the creation of the drawings was shrouded in strict secrecy. One undated document suggests "very special handling" because of "sensitivity of the material". It also orders "minimum handling by listed personnel".

The papers also include dozens of other unsolved reports that are definitely worthy of X-Files. Here's my favorite:

March 31, 1993: More than 100 people in the West Country and Ireland report seeing two brilliant objects with bright vapour trails flying North to South quickly and silently across the night sky - an episode now known to Ufologists as the Cosford Incident. Officials say some of the sightings may have a been a Russian Cosmos satellite re-entering Earth's atmosphere, but cannot explain away the sightings entirely. An official notes: "Personally I agree that while the decay of Cosmos 2238 might explain the high level 1.10am sightings, it would not explain the other sightings in the night in question."

As for all the UFO sightings in England right now, though, we all know it's that fly-headed alien in coveralls from the next Doctor Who special coming up.

Learn more about the British government's obsession with UFOs in The Telegraph.

You may remember UFO expert Jeff Peckman from his lobbying efforts to get an Extraterrestrial Affairs Commission created in Denver. At the height of his campaign, he promised journalists he would reveal absolute proof of the existence of aliens - via a video (now much parodied online) of an alien sort of jumping up and down outside a window.

Despite public criticism, Peckman soldiers on, continuing his quest to get governments at both the local and federal levels to acknowledge the secret history of UFO research and "X-Files" in the United States.

In a recent editorial, Peckman lays out exactly what the Obama Administration needs to know about aliens:

Sixteen months ago presidential candidate Obama said he did not know and did not pretend to know about intelligent life in outer space. But he’s also probably become aware that he can get a more detailed briefing on the real truth about ‘X-Files’ through the Internet than from U.S.military and intelligence agencies. President Obama's ‘Blackberry’ is his real key to the ‘X-Files’ treasury.

Expectations are high that President Obama will release the ‘X-Files’. But learning about UFOs and sharing that information with the people will not be a ‘slam dunk’ for the new U.S. President. Why? One reason is that U.S. Presidents in recent decades have been denied information about UFO ‘X-Files’. Another reason is that much of the evidence contained in the files was shifted to private corporations to keep it out of reach of Congress and U.S. citizens who might take the Freedom of Information Act seriously.

Are Roberto Orci and Alex Kurtzman reading this? Because I feel like the direction they've taken Fringe reflects this changed belief in the UFO community that the Big Bad who hides alien discoveries is the private sector rather than a secret government organization.

And if Orci and Kurtzman need some more ideas, Peckman's got a few. He thinks Obama needs to investigate the decades-old case of Billy Meier, a Swede who has some of the best images of UFOs ever seen (there's one above). How can Obama really hope to fix America if he doesn't deal with the Meier case? A good question indeed.

Read more Peckman, and see a lovely gallery of Meier images at the Examiner.

The UFO was caught on camera by Mark Schmutter, who claims that he saw it fly across the sky with the speed of a plane, before it suddenly changed direction and disappeared upwards into the clouds:

I decided to go out on the balcony and take some shots of Darwin... I just held the camera up and I saw this thing flash through the sky and I thought 'Oh my goodness what was that?', and then it came back again so I hit it with the camera... [I]t wasn't an airplane, no noise ... it was a fair way away, you know, but I didn't hear any noise.

Knowing how to keep a good story going, Schmutter's uncertainty opens the door for any paranoid UFOlogist or journalist to get excited by the possibilities:

It does look like a car but what would a car be doing up in the sky? ...I've got no idea about aliens, but anything's a possibility, isn't it?

Some are already claiming that the photos are faked, but Schmutter, unsurprisingly, denies any Photoshopping. We remain unconvinced, not only because of the ambiguity of the photos themselves, but because we'd like to think that today's extra-terrestrials would have better taste than to fly around the skies in a blue convertible sports car.

Muscle car UFO hoons over Darwin [Northern Territory News]