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Our Economy Needs A Miracle... Like In Science Fiction
| posts about #voodooeconomics more → |
Our Economy Needs A Miracle... Like In Science Fiction |
11/26/08
11/26/08
Invent a 100% reliable method of suspended animation, then split the population into seven groups. Everybody spends one day out of the week going about their regular business and the other six in suspended animation or "stoned". Each day a different person lives in your apartment, goes to your office, and does your job.
On the plus side, you're only using 1/7th of the planet's natural resources and you don't really notice the difference, other than the seasons passing 7x as quickly, but on the other hand, you've got at least 6 other roommates who leave the cap off the toothpaste and the toilet seat up, and there's absolutely no way you can confront them about their 1/7th of the back rent.
11/26/08
The Charlie Jade method: Step 1: Punch an atificial wormhole into a parallel universe with an idyllic version of The Earth, where everybody recycles and the planet's natural resources remain largely unspoiled. Step 2: Exploit the hell out of those ungrateful hippies! Step 3: Profit!
11/26/08
In this 3rd Doctor episode, the beautiful golden-skinned Axons land on Earth in desparate need of fuel. In exchange for a jumpstart from one of our nuclear reactors, they are prepared to offer us the miracle of Axonite-- a "thinking" molecule capable of replicating any substance (or at the very least, supersizing frogs). In one fell swoop, world hunger can be completely eliminated! All they ask is that the Axonite is distributed equally among the world's powers, so that everyone gets their fair share of this glorious bounty from the stars.
If it all sounds a bit too good to be true, it is. The Axons, Axonite, and their earwax-colored spaceship all turn out to be part of the same parasitic organism, and once activated, will suck the Earth dry of all forms of energy, including human life itself.
The Doctor sends the intergalactic carpetbaggers packing with the help of a handy dandy time-loop but not before reminding us that no matter where you travel in this great and mysterious universe, there ain't no such thing as a free lunch.
11/26/08