The Avengers assemble themselves into Earth’s mightiest Blu-ray collector’s set

Do you ever you wish you were omnipotent? If you answered yes and you have $150, congratulations — you can buy the Cosmic Cube, which gives you the power to alter the very fabric of reality, starting tomorrow! And as a bonus, it comes with six free Marvel movies on Blu-ray! But that’s hardly the only prize in this week’s DVD and Blu-ray releases…

Marvel Cinematic Universe: Phase One – Avengers Assembled

Holy crap, it’s finally here! Marvel nearly released this 10-disc set last year, which contain every Marvel-produced superhero movie so far (Iron Man, Iron Man 2, Thor, Incredible Hulk, Captain America and Avengers, plus Cap, Thor and Avengers in Blu-ray 3D, plus a bonus disc) only to find out someone had forgotten to license the Tessaract-holding suitcase from the movie. Now the suitcase has been altered, the exclusive props and replica files have been added, the extras have been set (“Never-before-seen deleted scenes, extended scenes, featurettes, animatics and more from each film”), and at $150 for six movies in a very impressive collector’s case, it’s not that bad a deal.

John Dies at the End

Don (Bubba Ho-Tep) Coscarelli’s movie adaptation of James Wong’s hit horror novel come to DVD and Blu-ray, where it will likely become the cult classic it was always destined to be ...eventually.

Hammer Horror Collection

Not the greatest selection — Dracula: Prince of Darkness, Frankenstein Created Woman, and Legend of the Seven Golden Vampires — but still a hell of a lot of entertainment for $8.

Dirk Gently

The BBC’s miniseries based on Douglas Adams’ other greatest series. You’ll be sad that they only made the pilot and the three episodes, but it’s still worth enduring the pain.

Earth’s Final Hours

A Federal agent has to keep the Earth rotaring. Brusimm.com (?) says this is "probably one of the smartest movies that has aired on Syfy in a long time!" which I believe is the very definition of damning something with faint praise.

Dark Matters: Twisted But True

The first season of the spiritual successor to Leonard Nimoy’s In Search Of... swapping Fringe’s John Noble for Nimoy and focusing on bizarre science instead of the supernatural. I’ve heard it’s quite good, actually.

Stitches

An evil clown comes back 10 years later to get revenge on the kids that murdered him. I have a theory: Scary clowns are still less scary than regular clowns. At least with scary clowns, you know where you stand.

Tokyo Magnitude 8.0 Complete Collection

A giant earthquake hits Japan, and basically everybody who lives is fucked. Think Walking Dead, but with the pure physical collapse of civilization instead of zombies.

How to Make a Monster

A group of computer programmers try to make the scariest video game ever through the use of a special telemetry suit, but then there’s a power surge and the suit comes to life and starts murdering people and oh god I can actually feel my brain leaking out of my ears while I type this.