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This is Garrison Dean, io9's resident viscount of photoshopperie, reporting in. Much like your significant other, I've been distant, busy with work, and just not fulfilling your needs. But it's Valentine's Day! And on Valentine's Day, I can make up for all my shortcomings and patch our fragile relationship with a short, cheap, burst of branded sentiment. And that is exactly what I have for you here!

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Come on, we've got a hard R new Conan film coming out with plenty of red band footage online. Did you think I wasn't going to do a trailer? More »
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There will come a day in the future where humanity wises up and realizes the brilliance of Sir Michael Bay. I only hope I'm alive to witness it. Remember: nothing succeeds likes excess. More »
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Did you miss io9's 1980s-style Firefly intro, (now with more awesome), or Simon Tam's new TV-doctor drama? Don't worry — we've got the best of 2010's original video content, tributes, and the most deranged collection of Found Footage right here. More »
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Last week Annalee told me that io9 was going to devote a week to "Disasters", and wondered if I'd like to do something special. Disaster being my "thing," I said yes. More »
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Well friends, let's do it to it, shall we? ON TO DISASTER!!! As always click to enlarge. More »
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Welcome Children to the weekly (when I get to it) spooky recap of this week in io9. Enter if you have the guts to face the terror that is... More »
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For some reason, the Buenos Aires branch of elite ad company Young & Rubicam figured that the best way to advertise condoms . . . is with images of a burning apocalypse? We've got the full (mildly NSFW) ad below. More »
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People complained that we left Simon Tam out of our 1980s-style Firefly opening credits. You failed to realize: That was Firefly's second-season intro. By then, Sean Maher had cashed in on his unbelievable popularity, with a spin-off. Check it out. More »
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Joss Whedon's Firefly was awesome, but its title sequence really didn't sell the show. What Firefly really needed was a kick-ass, old-school, synth-happy, guitar-solo, Yay Spaceships, 1980s-style intro credit sequence. And here it is. Joss, you can thank me later. More »
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This white, foamy oil slick appears almost beautiful in this satellite image — but it's set to become the worst oil spill in U.S. history. The Coast Guard is considering setting it on fire to save the environment. More »
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Happy Easter all. Thought I'd take the short holiday to bring you all brand new fresh disaster!!! Maybe I put my all easter eggs in one basket here, but it's a good basket. More »
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When io9 asked me if I could break away from my busy schedule of being awesome and create some disastrous Valentines . . . How could I say no? I love you all, and dammit you deserve it!!! More »
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Or, at least, it is when they interview moi for a pleasant fluff piece about fan-created trailers. Annalee can have the NY Times. USA Today had color before it was cool.
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Well hello there everyone. The minion is doing well and she gave me a little break from fatherhood to bring you all a new disaster for the new year. More »
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Hello friends. Over the past few months I've been telling you what was a disaster, now the time has come for you to pick your own. More »
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So, I had done a couple of Disasters for you when I woke up Saturday morning to an apartment with no power. So I got some breakfast and went record shopping. More »
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Hello all. I'm sorry I haven't been getting this to you as often, but please enjoy today's Disaster. More »
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Boy, you guys really really like Summer Glau. River more Bad-ass than Brock Sampson?! IT'S A DISASTER!!! More »
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Hello all. It's been a while. After traveling, family visits, technical difficulties, and paid work I am finally glad to bring you a new video, and this ain't no trailer. More »
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OHHHHH, it's spelled Bentl-E-y!!! Well now I know. I want to thank all of you for your many compliments on my 2012 video last week and for kicking it all over the internet. More »
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Well it's a holiday weekend and in an effort to work less on this week's column I probably ended up doing more work... whatever. I hope you enjoy the end result. More »
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Could this have been the biggest week of all time? The King of Pop bites it. A bit player from Saturn 3 and Logan's Run croaks. And ROBOT BAYHEM!!! Disaster! More »
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I am going to plug into the world wide web to surf down... Disasters!!! More »
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It seems that there are some of you out there who don't understand what Disaster is. So for you, I will explain... No, actually I won't. OMG IT'S A DISASTER! More »
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I refuse to believe that giant robots in any way shape or form can be a disaster. More »
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Well, ROACH has definitely not been a disaster, more on that below. But for now! It's Disaster Time. More »
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My apologies if this week is a bit lacking, but that death ray won't build itself. And I'm very happy to see all of you sporting the R.O.A.C.H. Disaster! More »
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Anyone here running a fever or a cough? How about just needlessly panicking? It's a Disaster!!!! More »
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Werewolf. Werewolf? There. What? There wolf, there Disaster! More »
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Hello hello hello. It's spring, a time for babymaking and disaster... Lets do a little of both, shall we? More »
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Is it me or did this week go by quick as hell? Anyways to the DISASTER Mobile! More »
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Well, despite having more God Machines than the Pope's Garage and more loose ends than a Caprican Strip-club "YEEEEAAAHH!" I was pleased. So say we all? LAUNCH ALL DISASTERS!
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Well, yet another Sunday is upon us. You all do anything this weekend? See any movies? Was it a disaster? NO IT WASN'T! Let's do this!!
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Musicals, mutants and the hidden secrets available to us all on Google Earth. Hey kids, what can I say... They're all disasters.
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Well, I kinda put all my eggs in one basket for the most part this week, but I think you'll be happy. Get to tha DISASTAH!!

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Good Day kids. I've got a couple weeks of disasters for ya. I'm too lazy to link all the original articles so an "i09 No Prize" for whoever does.

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Well it's Superbowl Sunday, and the only thing remotely scifi may be the ads. So it's my second week in and I'm already doing a themed post. All ads, all for you. More »
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io9 has called upon me and my fantastic research abilities to dig up (read: fabricate) news items that they missed throughout the week. Get ready for... disaster. More »
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