Tom Hanks’ love transcends time, but not this week’s DVD releases!

Did Cloud Atlas’ insane three-hour running time scare you off when the movie was in theaters? Well, now’s your chance to finally watch the scifi epic near the comfort of your own bathroom! Plus ponies, the Grim Reaper and zombie slayers gone wild, all in this week’s DVD and Blu-ray releases!

Cloud Atlas

The Wachowskis’ epic about a love story that transcends six different ages, many of which have Tom Hanks and Halle Berry in them in hilarious hairstyles. The film says “Everything is connected,” which apparently means “everything but special features,” since this disc has none of ‘em.

My Little Pony: Friendship Is Magic Season 2

26 episodes of pony pandemonium including the “Royal Canterlot Wedding.” Note: I could have written “Pony-monium,” but I didn’t, because even I have more dignity than that.

One Piece: Season 4, Voyage 5

Monkey D. Luffy chases after his crewmate Robin, who was kidnapped by the World Government’s elite CP9 squad, on the sea train bound to Enies Lobby. Sure, it sounds like gibberish if you don’t know the series, but if you do, it’s awesome.

3rd Rock from the Sun: The Complete Series

All six seasons of the lighthearted scifi sitcom starring a super-young Joseph Gordon-Levitt. It does make for a most insane Dark Knight Rises prequel, though.

Doctor Who: The Visitation Special Edition

The digitally remastered adventure of the Fifth Doctor as he takes on the Grim Reaper in 1666 England.

Brave New World

On one hand, it’s an adaptation of Aldous Huxley’s classic novel starring Leonard Nimoy. On the other hand, it’s a 1998 TV movie that both abridges and “modernizes” the original book. You'll have to look deep into your own heart to make this call.

VR Troopers: Season 2, Vol. 1

Those VR Troopers keep trooping those darned VRs in this 26-episode collection.

Power Rangers Samurai: The Sixth Ranger

Time for a game! Count all the delightfully ridiculous proper nouns in Amazon’s description of this DVD: “When a mysterious fisherman arrives, the Power Rangers Samurai meet their newest ally - Antonio, the Gold Ranger! But before he can join the team, Antonio must prove he possesses the true spirit of the samurai. Jayden, Kevin, Emily, Mia and Mike are challenged by the Nighlok monsters more so than ever when Master Xandred sends Steeleto to attack the Power Rangers, Antberry and Octoroo attempt to open a portal, and Splitface traps human spirits. Their new golden friend Antonio shows the Power Rangers he too can be a samurai with his lightning-fast Barracuda Blade, the ink-spraying OctoZord, and the ClawZord's megamodes! “

Mythbusters: Collection 9

Discovery doesn’t say what episodes this set includes and five minutes on the Internet din’t tell me either. If someone knows the deal, if he/she could do me a solid and post it in the comments I’d be most appreciative.

Chanbara Beauty: Movie Vortex

Based on the videogame Onechanbara: Zombie Bikini Squad (and not to be confused with the first low-budget Japanese movie based on the game). Basically, girls in small amounts of clothing fight zombies. I think that’s pretty much all you need to know.

Fangoria Presents: Germ Z

I was really hoping the “Z” in this low-budget horror flick stood for “Zebras,” but it turns out its still zombies. Way to miss an opportunity to do the world’s first zebra plague apocalypse movie, Fangoria!